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Beating Drums
Meditation
by gek
Citation:   gek. "Beating Drums: An Experience with Meditation (exp79402)". Erowid.org. Jun 20, 2020. erowid.org/exp/79402

 
BODY WEIGHT: 150 lb
I had a great meditative experience tonight. I began meditating about 3:00 in the morning with a great feeling. I had been excited to begin with and knew that since I was determined to make the experience a good one, it would turn out that way. Almost immediately I felt an great calm, one that was deeper and stronger than usual. With lights out, computer and phone off, anybody else in the house asleep, it became very easy to concentrate and there were few distraction besides my own internal chatter. Soon, though, as I continued to concentrate on breathing, that calmed too, until finally I felt as if I hit a more complete calm. With each exhalation, I could feel all thoughts being pushed out. It was as if I was cleaning out my head. With each inhalation, fresh cleansing breath was renewing me. I began to become a less active part of my breathing, and soon felt as if I was standing away from myself, watching my breathing, taking notice of how my body reacted. This became a passive or objective stance, and allowed me to look inward without feeling trapped within myself. I felt that I had escaped by body and was suddenly free, part of everything. I realized, though, that my breath itself was the only thing I was sure of. Each breath was the only sign of existence I could see. Since I was feeling as though I was a part of everything, I began to feel as though I was nothing except my breath, because of this revelation of my breath being the only thing to exists.

I became distracted a few times, and for a bit let myself feel trapped again within my body, tied to thoughts. I returned my focus to breathing, though, and reoriented my attention. I felt, now, as if I had once again left my body. There was a strong disassociation between where I was physically sitting, and where I felt I was in relation to my surroundings. Each breath became like a drumbeat that sounded deep within me. I felt as if somebody where pounding on an old drum, beating the rhythm of my life. My eyes had been flickering a bit, but know I was unsure of whether they were opened or closed. Despite the rooms darkness, I felt as if I was completely in my head, and whether or not my eyes were open or closed did not matter because I had left them somewhere else.

I eventually stopped meditating and went into bed with a great feeling of energy and happiness. Each breath I breathed as I was falling asleep gave me pleasure and I felt as if my body was reminding me of my existence at every moment. I was extremely happy and felt a new sense of purpose. A general feeling of well being washed me to sleep.

Exp Year: 2009ExpID: 79402
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Jun 20, 2020Views: 782
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Meditation (128) : Glowing Experiences (4), General (1), Alone (16)

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