DOSE:

450 ug

oral

AL-LAD

(blotter / tab)

BODY WEIGHT:

180 lb

I acquired three 150ug tabs of AL-LAD.

I tasted the first tab, mainly because I wanted to make sure it wasn't an NBOMe, and satisfied, swallowed it. Approximately an hour later, not being able to notice any effects I couldn't be sure weren't placebo, I bucally administered a second blotter tab under my top lip.

After a little while I noticed mild color enhancement and a bit of stimulant-like euphoria. Not satisfied, and worried that I wouldn't get where I wanted to go, I swallowed the tab and stuck the third tab under my lip. (I don't like chasing a high that never arrives.) Approximately two and a half hours after I administered the first, my nose started getting really cold, and my sinuses opened up. My eyes began to dilate -- my left eye not so much, but the dilation response from psychedelics never seem to affect my left eye like my right.

The lighting in the house took on a sunset pink hue, almost a dusky rose. The stucco ceiling began to heave and subside, even crawl over itself. The corners of the ceiling swirled--nothing was squared anymore. The doors were skewed and the floor was no longer level. I noticed that it seemed to bulge in spots, and when I placed my face on the ground to get a straight sight, I couldn't see past the bulges. (I just went to the same spot, and the bulge is gone.)

I listened to a couple great songs, including Wishbone Ash's Sometime World and Yes' Siberian Khatru, and I couldn't help but smile. As a musician, I ordinarily appreciate the complexity and nuances of such virtuosity, but under the AL-LAD's influence, everything had enhanced dimension and crunch, especially the bass.

My mouth became somewhat itchy. And there was a very annoying sensation of having super thin strands of hair stuck in it, and between my teeth. I've experienced this before with psychedelics. These 'hairs' seemed to be attached to my lips, but there was no removing them.

I had a slight headache during the come up and peak, which disappeared after about hour five. I didn't get the kind of patternization I get with psilocyn or LSA, but it was there. It didn't really stand out in full color. Actually the heaving and swirling, as beautiful as it was, was more of a distraction, as I was going through thought processes like I do when effected by salvinorin-A, but I wasn't on autopilot. I was able to think coherently, and didn't have the normal paranoia that I get (that I got w/ LSA!) -- in fact, I was not nervous at all about going outside to smoke. I did this approximately every hour or so, and every thirty minutes during the last three hours. I was saddened by a lot of my revelations, but it was more of a practical acceptance of the limitations of everything, and how we need to appreciate what we do have, especially family. I found myself thinking of my own children, and put myself in my parents place, and became very aware of the bond that exists between us all.

There is this vent that has some rust on it, and I couldn't look at it without the rust constantly boiling and seething into smoke and morphing back into its original form. Vapor trails and static patterns started to hit me hard at this point.

I practically live in an arts and crafts warehouse, and yet I couldn't find a pen when I needed it most. Once I located one, I began scribbling in tiny print: 'Thoughts are slipping away from my lips like tendrils of a forgotten sensation, as if the nerves have been burned away, or have lost their form and are waiting for a new one. A new form. Kittens. Adorable kittens, with red things around their necks, forced to wear them, and we, their human overlords, amusedly watch as they fight to remove the accessories from their bodies. As soon as they free themselves, we put put them back on, laugh at their toil, and call it cute. It is the same with us, as whatever overlords watching over us muse over our own struggles.' I then remember pondering chemical energy and how I forgot what it is to enjoy food.

Then, suddenly, I became aware of this wind. I could feel it in my soul just as much as I could hear it. I hadn't heard it since I was young, when the simplest things fascinated me, and the world was full of so much potential. I think had a lot to do with losing my ego, and I certainly did. I disintegrated to the point of seeing all the cigarettes I'd ever smoked strewn around ground, able to sense the tiny decay of the dying embers even months after they'd since burnt out. Phosphenes cluttered my vision quite a bit. I became aware of every speck in my home. I was distressed at how chaotic and messy everything was. The cobwebs along the baseboards. Tiny insects that looked like blue spatters of ink crawling across the porcelain tub. I became supersensitive to how old everything was. But my reflection in the mirror seemed so fresh, so new and alive in contrast to any objects around me. I found myself thinking of a particular concept of Philip K. Dick's: 'Kipple.' To quote a passage from 'Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep':
________________________________________________
JR - Kipple is useless objects, like junk mail or match folders after you use the last match or gum wrappers of yesterday's homeopape. When nobody's around, kipple reproduces itself. For instance, if you go to bed leaving any kipple around your apartment, when you wake up the next morning there's twice as much of it. It always gets more and more.
Pris- I see.
JR - There's the First Law of Kipple, 'Kipple drives out nonkipple.' Like Gresham's law about bad money. And in these apartments there's been nobody there to fight the kipple.
Pris - So it has taken over completely. Now I understand.
JR - Your place, here, this apartment you've picked - it's too kipple-ized to live in. We can roll the kipple-factor back; we can do like I said, raid the other apartments. But -
Pris - But what?
JR - We can't win.
Pris - Why not?
JR - No one can win against kipple, except temporarily and maybe in one spot, like in my apartment I've sort of created a stasis between the pressure of kipple and nonkipple, for the time being. But eventually I'll die or go away, and then the kipple will again take over. It's a universal principle operating throughout the universe; the entire universe is moving toward a final state of total, absolute kippleization.'
________________________________________________

I tried to follow the wind, and allow myself to be carried by it like a kite, but the more I tried, the more I realized I was reintegrating and losing it. It was approximately this time that I had a visitor at my door, a friend, ignorant of psychedelics. I was forced to try to act normal, immediately mentioning that I'd been drinking all night, to excuse my unusual behavior. The visit was short, but it was enough to have changed the dynamic of my experience.

My dog kept showing up where it shouldn't be. I'd have put him outside, and then I'd find him sitting down beside me, staring at me. Then, I'd go back outside and there he was! I kept wondering if my dog was a ghost of some sort. Smoking more cigarettes outside, I realized that reintegration is kind of like plugging back into the matrix. I was unhappy to return to the shallow perception of the ordinary world. Ultimately, I kept thinking about all things that I usually don't think about, things I ordinarily avoid, and felt like a glutton for punishment as I delved into some serious issues and found myself cornered by all these decisions that I know I have to make. I haven't made them yet, but I'm sure that facing them is an important. I thought about the unanswered questions I had from my last psychedelic experience (with LSA), especially that of what lies in the center of the fractal patterns. Because I just know it's important, and I can never get to the center. It keeps going inward. I took a shower, shaved, broke out the six pack of high-proof beer, and started drinking myself into a sleepy state. I woke up four hours later, tired, but without any hangover. I'd kill for a massage though.

All in all, this is a potent chemical, and worth experimenting with if you are ready for some serious reflection and want to disintegrate enough to change your outlook. During the comedown, I had tremendous bowel activity, and a ton of gas. I must have used the toilet ten times. I'd do it again, but my appetite for psychedelics has been sated for at least a month. There was a definite fulfillment to the experience, and I have a lot to hold on to.

Note: 450ug is a large dose. I was impatient, and I tend to experience to extremes. It's in my nature. Be careful.

Exp Year: 2013	ExpID: 100818
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 40
Published: Jul 23, 2013	Views: 16,847
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