Citation: Burroughs. "As if the Weight of the World Was Crushing Me: An Experience with Ether (exp101476)". Erowid.org. Apr 14, 2021. erowid.org/exp/101476
Our understanding of the literature is that there is no such thing as safe recreational use of volatile solvents, aerosols and other street inhalants : their psychoactive effects are inseparable from nerve and organ damage. We have chosen to include these reports to help document the real world use of inhalants, but their inclusion is not intended to imply that they are anything but dangerous.]
Devil's Ether Binge
It began like any other day, really. I've done ether before, and I've experienced great things, bad things, and things that I have no right to ever experience. The Ether Binge, as I call it, occurred just a few hours ago, on October 5th, around 9pm.
I began cleaning my room, and in my closet, underneath piles of old clothes and underneath my collection of drug paraphernalia, I found a liter sized bottle of diethyl ether, half full. I laughed to myself, remembering the things I've done under the influence. I decided then, when my mom left for poker night with her buddies, I would do the entire bottle.
I closed the curtain to my room after she had left, and making sure my grandmother was placated and sleeping soundly next door. Along with the bottle, I had found my lucky rag. Beforehand, I had washed it well to ensure that if any ether had remained from old highs, it hadn't gone bad and would get me sick or something of the sort.
I started by sprinkling liberal amounts into the rag, and mentally prepared myself. I told myself the experiences were always great, and chuckled when I remembered what Hunter S. Thompson had told Johnny Depp. 'It's like drinking twenty-three bottles of wine in under five seconds.'
I started slowly, breathing deeply. The high came on just as slowly. I felt as if the weight of the world itself was crushing me underneath its girth. My brother, who was in the next room, told me later on that I yelled something along the lines of 'The fat rolls of the Himalaya's are on top of me. The Grand Canyon in holding me in its arms! ' I could move, I know I could move. But the feeling was holding me down, as if someone had climbed on top of my chest, another person on each limb, and finally another person on my forehead and stomach. These people held me there, and the moment the high lifted, I flailed wildly, knocking against my dresser and bed. Things flew everywhere. The high lasted only a minute at most
The high lasted only a minute at most
, and when I came down further, I began laughing like a lunatic. I inhaled again, after resetting the rag. The laughter didn't stop this time, and instead of sitting down paralyzed, I rolled on the floor laughing for the extent of my second high.
I repeated this, over and over, the actions of the highs slowly melting into each other, and making a sort of master action. The key was in my hands, I remember thinking, and nothing else comes to mind, no matter how hard I try to piece my memory of the events back together.
I blacked out, and woke up around ten with only a small spattering of ether left in the bottle. My room was a wreck, and I cleaned up once again. I wasn't nauseous, and experienced only a very light ache in my sinuses and behind my eyes. After a quick but hot shower, the pain left me.
At the end of it all, I'm left with a sense of great satisfaction, and I washed my rag yet again.
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