DOSE:	repeated	oral	Smarts
	2 hits	sublingual	LSD	(blotter / tab)
	150 mg	oral	MDMA	(capsule)
	1 cart.	inhaled	Nitrous Oxide	(gas)
	2 bowls	smoked	Cannabis	(plant material)

BODY WEIGHT:

140 lb

A few days after Christmas, the rest of my family flew off for a week to visit relatives. That week, my boyfriend, Thistle, who lives in another state, came for visit from Friday to Sunday. During that time, we had planned to try MDMA together for the first time. Before the college semester ended, I acquired two caps of molly from a friend who insisted it was high-quality stuff. However, I had just discovered that my cannabis dealer had a few tabs of acid. I asked him if he was sure it was real LSD, and he insisted he was “100% sure.” Naturally I was still somewhat skeptical, as the man was in fact trying to sell me something, but I bought four tabs, thinking two of them could be a present for Thistle. I hadn’t considered when we would take each of the drugs we had on hand (namely the acid and molly, but we also had weed, MXE and nitrous on hand). Perhaps recklessly, I figured we could just take the LSD and MDMA together on Saturday. Thistle agreed, although we had each only taken LSD by itself once, and had never tried MDMA.

On Saturday, we walked my dog and watched the second Lord of the Rings movie (Thistle had somehow gone 19 years without seeing any of them. They were better than I remembered), and then at about 1:15 P.M. each took a cap of acetyl l-carnitine and green tea extract, which we had been advised to do with MDMA. I’m big into nootropics and I had plenty of both supplements on hand, although I had no alpha lipoic acid, which seemed to be regarded as the most important one, and I had run out of caps for my magnesium citrate powder. Antioxidants in general are supposedly excellent at preventing MDMA-induced damage, with a few exceptions. We took two tabs of what was sold to me as acid a piece. I had suggested we walk to the woods near my house, and while Thistle was somewhat reluctant, he agreed to it. We had never tripped outside before, and I wanted to see nature for the experience. I packed a bag with all of our remaining drugs, some snacks, my portable I-Pod speaker and plenty of water, and we left the house a few minutes after placing the blotters under our tongues.

It took about 12 minutes to walk to the woods, and then we descended a ravine to reach a place where my ex and I used to go to smoke weed. It is a somewhat secluded little cement dam, and to get to it we had to walk through some vegetation and across the top of a thin cement wall. Thistle was clearly a bit uncomfortable after all this, and he didn’t want to stay long. He said it had gotten a bit too perilous for him, and the place was not private enough for his liking. I understood, and packed back up again to leave, but not before we took our MDMA capsules and Rolaid antacid tablets. I could feel the LSD coming up, and as we walked out of the woods, I got jittery and started giggling uncontrollably. At that point I figured we got what we paid for, that being LSD, and that we were in for quite a time even if the molly turned out to be bunk. On the walk back to my house, Thistle pointed out how odd the angles are in my hometown (the very hilly Providence, Rhode Island), and I giggled even harder, never really having considered how topsy-turvy my neighborhood is. I felt anxious to get home quickly, as we both yearned simply to collapse on my couch for the rest of the come-up. Luckily, we got home safely, and before long I was very thankful to Thistle for convincing me to come back. Things soon got very intense and finding our way back in the state we were in would have been very confusing, unpleasant, and possibly dangerous. However, one good thing came from our sylvan expedition- I found a medicine bottle completely full of marijuana. I left it there until we were about to leave, just in case some rightful owner returned for it, but as none came, I figured it had been lost for good, so I put it in my bag.

Immediately as we landed on my couch, the acid fully kicked in. We felt spectacularly altered, and we got far more open-eye visuals than from any previous drug experience. The walls began breathing slightly and changing color, and moving our limbs resulted in very noticeable tracers. The closed-eye visuals were hardly less impressive, as kaleidoscopes of shifting green and blue energy overcame me. Thistle claimed everything was almost too much; he had never had much of anything in the way of open-eye visuals, and he was overjoyed by the fact that it was really possible, but he said he wouldn’t have been ready for anything much more intense than this. I barely had the facility to set up my I-Pod dock and put some tunes on. Music euphoria and enhancement proved to be fantastic. We listened to Mirroring’s Foreign Body, which is only 42 minutes long but seemed to last many hours and sounded absolutely nothing like what I remembered it sounding like. One of the first albums we listened to was Since I Left You by plunderphonics band The Avalanches, and when the track Frontier Psychiatrist came on, things went BONKERS.

However, it was not long before the MDMA kicked in and, in my opinion, it overpowered even the two labs of LSD and really stole the show. The euphoria was kicked up to a whole new level, one beyond anything I had felt before. Any anxiety and discomfort we had felt were completely erased, and absolutely everything we felt became not only positive, but incredible. Just touching each other felt great, as did talking; for what felt like a long time, we could do hardly anything but talk loudly and nonstop about how wonderful, beautiful, excellent, perfect, etc. we felt, acknowledging that we had absolutely no reason to keep talking, but that it too felt fantastic. I remembered that we should take more supplements, and that we should be drinking water. We took another cap each of ALCAR and green tea, and I moved a full bottle of water next to the couch, which we would nurse every few minutes for the next few hours. I figured that was the only chore we had left to do, but Thistle told me he had started grinding his teeth, and that we should chew gum. It was no trouble to run to my kitchen and grab a full pack, for once thankful for my mother’s habit of buying far more chewing gum than anyone in my family chews. Once I sat back on the couch with Thistle and put a stick in my mouth, I had no more reason to get back up for several hours.

Music continued to sound incredible. After the Avalanches album ended, I put on Primal Scream’s Screamadelica and then Shpongle’s Nothing Lasts… But Nothing Is Lost, those being the most upbeat and pleasant albums I could find on my I-Pod full of sad folk and industrial music. Each album sounded amazing, but we were barely paying attention. Between smacks of gum on tooth, we were talking loudly and endlessly to one another, very glad we had done this in my house while nobody else was home (there’s no way my parents would not have known we were really goddamn high). We behaved exactly as I had expected we would while rolling: we felt extreme empathy towards each other, but also towards just about every human being we thought and talked about. We thought about old friendships that ought to be rekindled, people we never liked but suddenly felt sorry for, people who deserved to be thanked and genuinely appreciated, and people we had seen or met briefly at college and should have tried to befriend when we had the chance. We were chatting like schoolgirls and practically inhaling chewing gum; the pack was empty by the end of the roll. Thistle’s face looked very glittery, which I had read was a common minor hallucination from MDMA. During this time we were still totally euphoric. Thistle pointed out, amid tears of joy, that every passing moment was better than the last, and that the universe had been entirely too good to us: why did we mere mortals deserve such bliss?

We had “gone further” with hallucinogens, but never had we felt so good on or off them. We even got up to dance at one point, although the two of us normally dislike dance. We were completely at ease with ourselves and each other, trusting each other completely and not worrying whatsoever about acting sappy. This sort of thing made me feel wonderful and continues to. I was diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome as a child, and while I felt I had overcome most of the negative symptoms of the disorder, I still felt cut off from other human beings. One of the main reasons I had so looked forward to trying MDMA was because it is regarded as being extremely beneficial for autistic people in terms of long-term empathy for and understanding of others. Finally feeling like I had a good grasp of things like theory-of-mind nearly brought a tear to my eye; I could really do it! I was not fundamentally unable to understand people at the level of at least the average “neurotypical!” In addition to Asperger’s, I have a mild case of Generalized Anxiety Disorder and I have been depressed for nearly my entire post-pubescent life, and I went into the roll hoping it could help with those as well. Writing this several days later, I firmly believe it did.

During the peak of the experience, Thistle and I agreed, in complete euphoric honesty, that we had been made for each other and that we ought to spend the rest of our lives together. Although we are only 19, he told me that he could gladly legally marry me at that very instant. A bit later, we opened up a zone in which to share whatever we disliked about each other, so that, without fear of judgment, we could give advice about how to be better and more likeable people. It did not surprise me that we only had a few little things to say here, as there are very very few things Thistle does that I dislike, and he feels the same way about me, but it was a wonderful idea to share them, as it helped the candyflip feel more “cleansing” and ultimately helpful. We also spent plenty of time sharing the things we appreciated and hadn’t mentioned about each other. Thistle is a gifted photography student, and for one of his projects two semesters previous, he took a series of pictures around the theme of what his life would be liked if I were erased from it, a la Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. I told him that it had touched me deeply that I had meant so much to him at the time, and that I had felt honored to be the subject of so many pictured by such a talented artist, adding that I had no idea why I hadn’t told him how much it all meant when he showed me the pictures. Thistle burst into fresh happy tears at this point, and responded that that was the nicest thing anyone had ever said to him. Thinking of it as a sacrament of our love, I suggested we each do a whippet simultaneously, while holding hands and staring into each other’s eyes. This we did, but, strangely, we barely felt a thing from it, although I had had truly incredible experiences with whippets on cannabis and methoxetamine and I had read many people online say LSD+Nitrous and MDMA+Nitrous are mind-blowing combos. In my state I did not feel the least bit disappointed though, as we were on Cloud 9 anyway. We just laughed about it.

Eventually, we started to come down. It was a surprisingly gentle comedown for two extremely artificial and powerful chemicals. I had worried that we would get an awful ecstasy crash while still tripping hard, but I have a very hard time pinpointing when exactly either drug wore off. We got up to urinate several times, and each time was torrential and ecstatic. We thought of our good mutual friend Nicholas, who is very hard on himself and considers himself an awful person whom nobody likes, despite having the kindness of a saint and being quite bright and talented. We decided that he needed MDMA in his life and that it would be well worth buying some for him as a good deed; he has never done drugs but is surprisingly open to the idea. I texted my ex (still a good friend- we split up on very good terms) and several friends from college and the dealer who sold us acid, telling them I loved them and was having a lovely time, and wished them a happy new year. Thistle and I were in agreement that this had been the best day of our lives, and that we deserved it and needed it. Being very much in the mood for good deeds, I decided I would just give the jar of weed I found in the woods to my ex to do with as he pleases. He smokes a lot more than I do, and he deserves it. Thistle and I still felt great, but started to feel pleasantly dumb and lazy. I made each of us a mug of hot chocolate, with which we took more supplements to prevent MDMA-induced toxicity: more green tea and ALCAR, 12mg of Melatonin, and some 5-HTP to help replenish serotonin. Later I made a mug of actual green tea, which was the best mug of tea I have drank. We listened to Dan Deacon’s ablum Bromst, which made of feel very nice although it was no longer very magnified by the drugs. In my favorite track, Dan repeats many times the line “I’ve been wrong so many times before… but never quite like this.” Hearing this nearly made Thistle cry with joy again.

A bit later Thistle started to feel mildly uncomfortable, mostly physically. He had to keep chewing gum to prevent tooth-grinding, and he said he felt a bit anxious and looked forward for things returning to normal. I prepared a small bowl of cannabis to smoke, suggesting it might make him feel a bit better and take the edge off; neither of us was looking to get higher, as such. When we had finished smoking and drinking tea, we went up to bed. We were both tired, but not quite ready for sleep. We took our various usual sleep aids and cuddled for a few minutes, and then tried to sleep. Unfortunately, several hours went by without sleep, although we had gotten into bed much later than we usually do. We tried smoking another bowl of weed for sleep, which worked for Thistle, but didn’t do much of anything to me. I eventually went back downstairs and got on my computer, not knowing what else to do. I let a few people online know how much they mean to me, and then went back upstairs and finally fell asleep, without having woken Thistle.

The next morning we felt quite nice, although we had mild headaches that went away in a few hours. We showered, and I walked Thistle to the bus station. We had made a pact involving various ways we would try to improve our lives, and I reminded him, before he left, to uphold that pact. The rest of the day was quite quiet. I was sad to see him go, but still in a wonderful mood, and I think I will be for quite some time.

Exp Year: 2013	ExpID: 102183
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 19
Published: Feb 23, 2026	Views: Not Supported
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LSD (2), MDMA (3) : Combinations (3), Glowing Experiences (4), Music Discussion (22), Relationships (44), Small Group (2-9) (17)