Citation: kc. "Comfortably Numb: An Experience with Kratom (exp102523)". Erowid.org. Mar 26, 2018. erowid.org/exp/102523
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So I guess I will start with what brought me to using kratom - after experiencing a number of different drugs (marijuana, cocaine, methedrone, salvia and steroids) I decided I wanted to try a depressant after a few bad experiences with stimulants (paranoia and long term anxiety) so I started searching the internet about depressants and that's how I came across opiates which then led to me coming across kratom.
I had ordered 25g of kratom and 2 days later it had arrived, It smelt earthy but not too bad. I called my friend D over and told him I had this natural pain killer and explained to him what kratom is about. My mindset was pretty fine, it had been a relaxing few days although there had been long term stress due to family difficulties, extremely bad back pain and the general stress that life brings. Me and D went out to my shed (its newly built and is being converted into a bedroom) so we pulled up a chair each and I got out 2 glasses and filled each one up with a tablespoon of powdered kratom leaf then added apple juice and stirred well. I would like to add that neither me or D have taken any drugs in over 2 years and that before this experience I had consumed some cereal about 4 hours before.
(T-00.00) we drink the foul tasting, lumpy drink slowly and I begin talking to D about his problems at home and he explains that he wants to move out of the city. I feel happy that, if this drug works, then both us us will stop worrying about the struggles in our lives.
(T+00.10) ten minutes pass and we decide that this stuff isn't working so I put in another 3 heaped tablespoons of powder into my drink and add more apple juice, I then give D another 3 heaped tablespoons as well.
(T+00.30) I'm definitely beginning to feel something, I mention to D that my body is starting to feel really heavy and thus I begin to panic (common reaction I have to taking drugs) but I eventually calm myself down with my first aid breathing technique and continue with the heavy feeling I'm having.
(T+1.00) a whole hour has gone by and now I'm begining to peak, I can feel a knot in my stomach and I think I need to puke but after getting some air I feel better. I've been feeling the drug take a stronger hold on my body and mind, when I sit down I don't have the energy to lift my arms and I feel rather spaced out (feeling spaced out usually creeps me out but it felt okay with kratom, maybe because it was keeping my heart rate down so it wasn't too bad)
(T+1.20) the kratom has definitely peaked on me, I can barely keep my head up and I'm struggling to stay awake. My thoughts are cloudy and it seems too much of an effort to think so I tell my friend I'm going to put my head down (at this point my friend has another half tablespoon of kratom)
(T+1.40) I put my head down on the table and have my first ever experience of a 'nod' and...wow!! It felt amazing, infact it was the best feeling any drug has ever given me, my constant anxiety had completely gone and I felt so safe, not euphoric but just ok, like nothing else mattered except the fact that I was ok, I began to get cold pins and needles all through my body but it was as if they were so cold that they were actually burning. Neither me or D were talking and the only sound was from the water dripping off the roof and hitting a puddle, it sounded beautiful. I lay in this state of half sleep for about an hour and a half. Feeling warm and safe.
When I opened my eyes and lifted my head I suddenly felt completely sober. My friend commented that he was feeling dizzy when he stood up so he just sat back down and closed his eyes for a bit.
(T+4.00) later that night I was due to go on a double date with my fiancee and D and his girlfriend to see a circus show, I felt spaced out still all this time after and my stomach was quite knotted, I tried to eat but it seemed to make the nausea worse. We got into the taxi and I began to sweat buckets (I get travel sick so this was a big part in why I felt so bad) we arrived at the show and I thought to myself 'I'm not gonna make it through this entire performance'
(T+7.00) I made it through the performance and about ten minutes into it I began to feel completely sober again. After getting home I made some food and wolfed it down without any upset stomach then went straight to bed where I had a beautiful sleep although some strange dreams!!
(T+18.00) I wake up to find I don't feel anything, no back pain, no worried thoughts racing through my head and no butterflies in my chest
(T+20.00) I'm walking to a business meeting with my fiancee and I decided to hold her hand the entire time because I felt so peacful and in love with everything about her. On the way to our meeting a man who is a total creepy psycho who my family have been having trouble with drove past us and something surprising happened...I didn't care. There was no anxiety or bad feelings towards him or thoughts of what he thought about me because it just didn't feel important to me. I walked about after our meeting in a haze, I felt as though none of the negative things that have happened in my life were important enough to care about anymore
T+32.00) I just had a bath and everything feels fine, still no back pain or anxiety and my mind feels as though it has had a much needed rest from all the shit life throws at it - the best way I could describe the peak on kratom is 'comfortably numb' it was a wonderful feeling, like being back in the womb - no worries or fears, no hopes or dreams because none of it matters, I just felt...ok.
I understand a lot of people who have already tried opiates or harder drugs may have a weaker reaction to the drug but I think my lack of drug use certainly made this experience much greater for me.
I may use kratom again or I may not, I could definitely get addicted to it if its not used responsibly. I feel like after all the stress I've been under lately, it was the perfect thing to ease my mind and body.
Peace and love to the person reading this.
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