Citation: YoungFirstGrader. "Falling In Love For No Reason: An Experience with Methallylescaline then LSD (exp102589)". Erowid.org. Dec 2, 2016. erowid.org/exp/102589
I was at a party with my trusted friend M and before he had came and picked me up I had taken seven or ten milligrams of Clonazepam.
The reason for this party was that it was the last day that my cousin E was going to be living at his Dad's before moving out. So of course, to celebrate, what else do we do other than have a good drunk lousy night? I had already began to feel the effects of the clonazepam before we arrived and I was feeling 'normal' more social as I have a high tolerance to benzodiazepines. After a while of drinking, smoking, and talking my friend M motions me to come over to him.
'Hey man, want to put this drug inside you? Haha,' I smile at him, drunkenly, 'Of course I would love to. what is this drug called and what does it do?' He told me it was methallylescaline, a test chemical with a feel between molly and mescaline. I was wary of the drug telling him I had doubts about it. He quickly reassured me letting me know that he himself, and others had taken it and were on it currently. He also told me I didnt have to 'accept the free drugs' he was giving me if I didnt want to.
Of course, this made me want to ingest it more. So I did, he cut a threshold dosage of the strange chemical and put it on the surface of a book. It looked like cut cocaine, but yellow-ish in color. He had told me to only take it orally though, not to snort it because it was crystalline so I slid my tongue across the surface collecting all methallylescaline of the top and gulping its pharmaceutical taste down with a swig of beer.
I have extreme social anxiety, often, but after a while when the methallylescaline began to start working I felt hysterical. Laughing at every human folly present in the room. I noticed a girl, in the corner of my cousins room. She was alone (she was alone but not lonely looking), but was evidently really interested in the book she was reading. 'God' forbid I ever begin a conversation with a cute girl sober. I walk over and crouch right next to her and ask what she's reading. She smiles at me, obviously pleased with my interest. She begins explaining she was just skimming over poems. She reads a few select to me, they made me want to cry. The words were so heavy. So real, I could feel them, they gave me goosebumps. I found all of them delightful and amusing at the same time though. Talking to that girl about poetry (I, being a reader myself) felt extremely content with the fact that she, and poetry existed.
As it begins to get late my mom calls me and asks if I need a ride. Arriving with my friend M I asked him if he wanted to leave (Everyone was passing out by this point even though it was only about seven o'clock) He said yes, he had things to do tomorrow Saturday. On the ride home I felt happy and sleepy, I had put in my favorite black flag album and just mostly had on and off conversations with my mother and friend. This is when I recall during my fucked up escapade at my cousin's house I had bought 3 hits of acid off of my friend R. I felt them in my pocket, protected by a small thin layer of aluminum foil.
My friend was dropped off, I was home, and the drugs I had taken that day began to wore off. Surprisingly the methallylescaline had no hangover-like effects afterwards. I went home, put on a boring movie and fell asleep peacefully. (best sleep ever)
When I woke up I remembered the three hits I had in my pants pocket. I was overly excited to trip that day (alone because both friends I had wanted to be sitters or partake could not make it to my house) so I immediately got up and got fully dressed for it was heavy winter and I had planned to go to one of my favorite places, the woods. I read a few trip reports and blared some music while I packed my backback with blankets, water, headphones, a snack, and a good book, as well as my phone and some really tasty djrum clove cigars. I took two hits initially and decided to take the third while peaking. I had done acid before, but only one hit so I did this to 'test the waters' Which I shouldnt really do with acid I know, but at the moment...No fucks were given.
I tell my mother I am leaving and I'll be back soon I give her a kiss goodbye and walk out the door dressed just enough to fight off the cold. Everywhere I looked. Snow. Dead trees. It was already beautiful enough on it's on that day. I start playing Portugal. The Man's album Satanic satanist and begin walking towards the secretive trail in my woods having to lift my foot nearly a feet off of the ground to make it to the entrance through the snow.
I felt very drunk and stoned, as well as lucid. I continued on walking. The snow in the woods was no longer very tall. the trees had protected the paths and made them somewhat clear. I went to one of my favorite spots running like a wild man. It felt so good to breathe and to feel my heartbeat as I ran. I stopped peering over the edge of a wall of dirt I used to call the cliff as a child. It had a running creek beneath it that caused it to form. I sat and I just stared at the water Playing tricks with my eyes. I felt as though the tree sunken underneath the water was going to rise any minute now. The snow beneath me was not cold. underneath it looked as though I was standing on top of snow covered ice masquerading an underwater current.
I crouched down and pressed the surface of the ground and I could see and feel water leaking out of cracks of ice. this amused me. very much. I would jump all around watching the 'water' under the ice seep through the cracks I had made. I can't remember very much afterwards. So many thoughts. I loved hallucinogens, but the thought racing always made me hesitant to ingest them. I figured I had circled the woods twice, somehow replaying every song I listened to initially again in the same order. It was as if I lost my mind in a time loop. I felt like a wandering homeless man. I decided it was time to turn back. I headed deeper into the woods towards a bridge I often frequent to get back to a road so I could walk home faster. On my walk back the side of the road and the actual road were separated by great length and waving and it was very hard to maintain balance and normality in my strides. Cars were slower than usually and I could feel the stares from many drivers as I walked towards my house (This being a road leading to an interstate) I couldnt wait to get back home and do something interesting that would play with my senses.
Walking back, a cop pulled next to me and told me that a few people had called in and said a suspicious person was walking near their house. His face (typical cop, typical cop stache) was growing larger and smaller coming at me and receding and so were the frames of his driver seat window. I told him nonchalantly, 'Of course I look suspicious I've been walking these roads with a backpack on and a bandanna on my face to keep the wind.' He replied, 'Oh yeah of course well see you later now,' 'Have a nice day!,' I replied with a fake smile as he drove off. I was angry, yet so thrilled I did not have to come in contact with anymore officers. It almost enraged me. It made me feel robbed of my privacy and rights. I thought 'What? Can people not fucking walk around anymore in un-designated areas? Fucking Cop, Pig, Bitch.'
Such rude thoughts made me happy. As I got back home I decided to cut through a cornfield to avoid sight and the road since I was now beginning to trip really heavily.
As soon as I arrived home my mom was outside taking my two puppy huskies outside. I was more than happy to take them off her hands. They were so cute it made my brain feel like it was taking a warm bath. Like the girl interested in poetry I was also glad that cute animals existed.
I went inside afterwards exclaiming to my mom that nothing really matters and I was laughing hysterically. I told her she should have dropped acid with me and she just laughed at me and said to go to my room. I told her I didnt want to. The confined space. I told her I wanted to talk to her. She was laughing (My mom having done this before a lot and also being open minded about drug usage and is an advocate for marijuana and also very trusting of me). She told me she loved me and hugged me and it felt so good and correct. She said that it was about to get a lot more intense though and I needed to be somewhere away from my Father
She said that it was about to get a lot more intense though and I needed to be somewhere away from my Father
(Head of the house, bible thumper, hypocrite type o' man). So she called my dear friend M and had him pick me up. Everything felt as though it was 'Going according to plan' I gave him a hug when I saw him and and just simply said hello and off we drove, talking like normal. He didnt know I was tripping so he was planning to take me to a party at his friends.
Staring out the window of the car watching the clouds play with themselves I really didnt even think much of it at all. We went back to my cousin E's house and picked him and his friend R up to accompany with us. We stopped to get some food at Taco Bell and as I went inside I immediately felt kind of sick and like I didnt belong so I went outside to smoke a djrum clove cigar. It tasted wonderful and smoking was so pleasurable, it felt nice to get away from the interiors of taco bell and the people within it. I watched the traffic from afar on the main road. All the cars driving back and forth were so boring so...stupid looking. Like a majority of monkeys driving 2,000 lb machines of death. We left to continue towards the party something I had completely (constantly) kept forgetting about. It was also the super bowl (the reason for the party) which everyone seemed to remember during through intervals as well.
Looking out the window watching the clouds I began to feel extremely intense. Anthony Green's song Dear Child I've Been dying To Reach You was blasted in my friends car and I was peaking HARD. I had to grip the seats of the car as if I were on a rollercoaster. The roads ahead would break off into different roads like they were from different areas of the worlds. One tall and snowy the other low, dusty, desert like, used. My friend would always follow these roads though. To him he was just simply driving, To me he was some sort of rock I was holding on to that knew exactly what was happening and why. I felt like something big was going to happen. Like a nuclear weapon was going to set off and we were all going to die. If we did I thought to myself many times I would be perfectly okay with it. Still peaking, He put in a Tchaikovsky cd and it got REALLY INTENSE I felt every movement of the song. Like first, beautiful calm, then BAM war tunes! Battles! The clouds were changing to the musics emotion! It was INCREDIBLE. I saw vines grow back and forth on trees and the ground and I saw Snow cover the land and then recede. It left me speechless.
We arrived at the party, Bam, OPEN.
Door opens. A cute girl greets me and hugs me and I realize how disparate I appear and that I had mud and snow on my clothes and a crazy look in my eye. Everyone was staring at me. I just walked over to the corner of the room and set my backpack and shoes down and took a seat. Everyone there was drunk and high and watching them was strange. I felt like a wallflower not really interacting with anyone. What could I possibly say anyways? 'Yeah man I'm fucked up on some L right now, good shit,' No I actually was really coherent when talking to people. I myself, am an awkward person and to have to be social is terrible, and being social on the most acid I've ever ingested was even worse, but I got over it and I feel as though its helped my anxiety today... Anyways as I was there I had super man lungs and enjoyed everyones ridiculous conversations. Every time I was offered pot I would clear the owners bong at least four or five times in a row everytime it came round to me, but I could not get high at all off of the weed.
There was a girl there dressed as a 1920's esque prostitute and she showed everyone her ass. I didnt want to look though I was indifferent to most of everything at the party. There was a girl there though. She looked so insecure. she had really big eyes and was unbearably cute...I fell in love with her. Well I actually didnt, but I looked into her eyes and felt like I did. It felt so good. I went out to their balcony for a smoke as I did not want to socialize or drink. She came outside and talked to me briefly. She didnt know I was on L, but I made her laugh a lot and it made me really happy. As everyone was passing out I couldnt sleep and she gave me a pillow and for the rest of the time until my cousin woke up for the drive home I laid awake half tripping playing with my faded tracers listening to music.
My LSD experience was speechless. It was beautiful. It was a good clean memorable trip. I'll do acid soon again and have a little more fun knowing what to expect at higher doses.
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