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Eyes Closed Mind Open
by thewhitecrx
Citation:   thewhitecrx. "Eyes Closed Mind Open: An Experience with 4-AcO-MET (exp104063)". Erowid.org. May 16, 2019. erowid.org/exp/104063

30 - 35 mg oral 4-AcO-MET
    smoked Tobacco - Cigarettes


On an oval wood table next to my bed is a cup containing 30-35mg 4-aco-met. The scale said 33mg. I have consumed this compound in the 15 to 20mg range 3-5 times before.

The settings of these experiences have always been around people or in a social environment. The feelings of these primary experiences was that of one similar to a small dose of mushrooms. A difference could be said that it is not as enveloping or deep. That’s what was expected, a recreational substance for a fun “party” type of vibe with psilocybin-like morphing visuals and beautiful colors. There is also a feeling of pure humor and many of us would go on a giggle fit for a good while until tears came rolling out of our eyes. Music also has a very funny almost “foreign” sound to it. There is also a body high associated with it that consisted of feeling weak or “drained” in my limbs. At the same time there is a kind of a stretching feeling in my gut or heart that emulates to the rest of your body .feels almost like energy or my blood moving through my body. After these group experiments, there was a feeling that the social settings and me having to try to keep myself composed hindered on the full experience. So next time I decided It would be taken by myself in a no worries environment.

At some time I had come across an article about john Hopkins university doing psilocybin research study. They were researching into the more mystical or “spiritual” nature of the effects. And I had read of a dosing strategy that was by participants weight. The dosing strategy was .45mg/kg. And 80% or something of the patients had what they call a “mystical experience”. This was going to be my next dosing strategy. I would take it when I felt was right.

That’s how I felt when I consumed the cup containing 30-35 mg of 4-acetoxy-met. There was no anxiousness when consumed. I felt calm, collected, and on top of myself. Only a feeling to see what effects would happen. After it was consumed I lay down on my bed and smoke a cigarette. After I put the cigarette out I lie there for about 25-30 minutes when I started to notice effect. I yawn but It feels a little funny. Some objects have a light wiggle effect when moving my eyes to look around. There is a light haze around everything with a kind of dull sparkle on the edges of some objects.

I lay back down and close my eyes. During this time it feels like my thoughts are slowed and there is a giddy anxiousness. In the next 15-30 minutes my body begins to feel somewhat drained, like my body is a rubber band and is being stretched a little bit. I have been lying with my eyes closed for most of the duration. My body also feels a little cold so I put a blanket over myself and sit up to smoke another cigarette realizing the effects are getting greater. As I smoke the open eye effects are more pronounced and are occurring more often than before. There is light-medium morphing and objects moving slightly closer and further. Shadows are almost colorful. There is a very humorous feeling and I giggle. After I put the cigarette out I lay back down and put the blanket over me and close my eyes.

The next 10 minutes lying on my stomach I begin to feel the body drain but it is different this time. The rubber band feeling starts to dissipate. At the same time it feels like all my blood is moving from my fingers and toes up through my body into my brain leaving my body feeling almost empty. Also there is and intense feeling in my gut that feels like a flame churning, it feels like a stored orgasm of some kind that wants to be released
there is and intense feeling in my gut that feels like a flame churning, it feels like a stored orgasm of some kind that wants to be released
. My heart has a similar feeling but feels like electricity coming from it moving through the nerves in my body. The giggly feeling has turned into a hilarious feeling and my mind space is very stoned. I crack my eyes open a bit to see the blanket hung on my wall, it has a flower pattern and the flowers are turning and twisting and morphing together. When I move my eyes around it feels like my vision is moving in frames, not completely smooth.

I close my eyes again and move to a different laying position. My limbs feel completely drained. With my eyes closed I see very natural looking geometric patterns. They are not sharp like squares and triangles but smooth and round live ovals and hexagons patterning together like a quilted blanket. There are also visuals of bright or neon colored streaks moving around and doing things. I feel tired, like if I wanted to go to sleep I could, but I stay awake with my eyes closed looking at all these beautiful patters, they have a very “living” quality to them. They move similar to bacteria under a microscope moving and forming into new organisms.

The body high has gotten more intense and feels like pure happiness coming from my gut and pure love coming from my heart. The feeling is more intense than mdma but it feels trapped in my body. My mind space is very open and wide. It feels vast. The visuals keep coming like a side show but are turning from beautiful patterns to painting like visions and beautiful scenes. Every now and then I snap out of it and giggle and say “holy fuck” then a second later I'm back in another visual trip. The visuals now have a very mystic and ancient sense to them. Visions of ancient amazonian, mayan, and egyptian symbols and weird mystical looking shaman like people turning into to other mysterious things nonstop. The visuals were always transforming.

Now it feels as if my head has opened up. Instead of seeing visuals in the front of my head I can now roam around my mind freely. There is no control over what I am seeing but there is a feeling of power to travel to which part of my brain to explore. I can see visions and patterns from the back of my head. The body high now is nothing I have felt before I feel like I am having an orgasm of pure love coming from my gut going all over my body, it is very steady but sometime comes on intense waves which feels insane. My heart also feels pure happiness it felt like it was almost too much to control. I also feel I can see or sense all the nerves and bloodlines in my body. The visuals now I am not in control of any way. They are not so much visual but feel as if they are right there in my head, not just the front. Now also I cannot control what part of my brain they are taking place. I cannot remember much after this point but some crazy shit happened.

I made discoveries and inventions and realizations of my life and family and friends that were very deep to me. I had access to any knowledge I wanted and could go anywhere in my brain or memory, I could do anything in my head. They were so profound the happiness and love made me feel like I was going to explode. I had the god moment where it was almost like an onion of pure bright light unraveling as it was shown to me. I don’t believe in god and don’t remember what was revealed to me(or I revealed to myself) but when it happened it was amazing and immediately felt as if I was one with everything and everything was at one with me. It was pure ecstasy. Before or after this time there was also a sense of other forces or beings with me or guiding me. There was good ones and bad ones but even the scary beings would show me negative things but they were true and the ecstasy of realizing the truth would dissolve the being into me and I would feel a wave of orgasmic feel coming from my gut and heart go over my body. There were good ones to that would show me lovely things and feelings and also dissolve into me and give me a another wave of ecstasy. They did not have a look to them but where more of a white aura, kind of like an angel.

The experience was very similar to what I have read about dmt experiences or “breakthroughs”.
The experience was very similar to what I have read about dmt experiences or “breakthroughs”.
After that I continue to come down slowly. The rest cannot be remembered but it was very dreamlike and afterwards it feels like it was all a dream. I can only remember bits and pieces. The visuals overall were very naturalistic and ancient like and also very much like an alex grey painting. People say this chemical has no real deepness or “soul” to it compared to mushrooms or 4-aco-dmt. I feel this chemical has its own unique soul. There is deepness to this chemical but I feel the humor and love feelings are just more pronounced than the mindfuck feeling. Its like going into the void without the fear of jumping.

This is the first trip report I have written, actually the first thing I have written since I was in high school 6 years ago. Now I plan on writing more on past and future drug experiences. Maybe writing will be a new hobby? Thanks for reading guys! Love ya!

Exp Year: 2014ExpID: 104063
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: 23 
Published: May 16, 2019Views: 2,939
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4-AcO-MET (711) : Alone (16), Glowing Experiences (4), Retrospective / Summary (11)

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