Citation: Squeakymouse. "Rollercoaster of Emotions: An Experience with LSD, MDMA, MDA & Cannabis (exp104562)". Erowid.org. Oct 4, 2019. erowid.org/exp/104562
Psychedelics are some of my favorite mind-altering substances to consume. My experience with them breaks down to:
LSD: approx. 15 times
Mushrooms: approx 5 times
MDMA: 5 times
RCs (various): approx 10 times
The experience I wish to tell you about happened in October 2014. I was at a Burning Man regional event in Ohio. It was a Saturday, the busiest day of the event, and there were around 350 people in attendance. The weather was wet and cold - it had rained most of the day and night prior, and the temperature had dropped into the low 50s, wih heavy cloud cover that showed no signs of breaking.
I spent most of the day preparing for the journey I knew was to come.
I spent most of the day preparing for the journey I knew was to come.
I had managed to acquire a hit of acid from a trusted source, as well as a MDxx (I believe it to be mostly MDA, but it was untested) pressed pill. My plan was to take them immediately following the effigy burn, come rain, cold, sleet, or tornadoes.
While preparing my mind, I spent time resting in the warm and recovering from the psychedelics I had taken the night before (a hit and a haf of acid, and an unknown amount of 4-ACO-DMT in a pressed pill that came from a trusted source). It had been a plesant journey, and I was expecting tonight's to be more mild because of raised tolerance. Boy was I in for a surprise.
As night fell and the effigy was lit, I became a little more anxious. It was only getting colder, and while the rain had stopped, it was still soggy and gross outside. I made my way to my tent to collect my things, and then went and met up with a friend.
I consumed my roll and tab at around 9:30pm. From here on out I am not sure of times. I also gave a roll to my sister, who was on a hit of acid as well.
After consuming my party favors, I wandered off for a little while. I ran into a friend who had a bottle of alcohol-based THC tincture, which I took a couple drops of, as well as two weed-infused rice crispy treats. As I nibbled on half of one, I realized I was out of water, and wandered back to camp.
At my tent, I ran into another friend who invited me to smoke a bowl with them. I agreed, and made my way into their tent. While we were smoking, I was also offered a bump of some crystal MDA in exchange for one of the weed edibles I was given, which I accepted and took immediately. At this point, I was starting to feel slight effects, but nothing too strong. Just a light, bouncy feeling and a slight increase in colors.
Once we were done smoking I went and grabbed my LED hoop, and trekked out to see what was going on. I found my sister by one of the communal fires. She was already rolling and tripping HARD. It wasn't until I looked into the fire that I realized I was too. Way harder than I had been expecting.
Just as I was about to sit down and take a couple deep breaths, another friend walked up and asked if I would safety him while he spun some fire. I am a fire performer as well, and so safetying while high is not a new experience for me. I agreed, grabbed his safety blanket, and lit his wicks.
At this point, everything was hitting me full force. I felt flighty and anxious, and had a hard time standing there steadily while he performed. I realized too late that this was not at all a good idea, but I planted my feet and waited out his spin, forcing a smile onto my face. Once he was done, I returned to my sister, who suggested we go wander and find some music to dance to. I agreed, hoping that it would help.
As my sister, her husband, and I wandered towards the nearest music, I found myself nearly unable to walk. The ground seemed to wave and undulate underneath me, and even though I wanted to hoop, I was unable to keep any kind of balance or coordination. All of the lights and sounds washed over me in an entirely new and overwhelming way. This was not my first time taking psychedelics in this environment, but never before had I been so utterly uncomfortable.
After dancing, we wandered further back into the quiet camping area, where there was another communal campfire. I stood there awkwardly, staring into the fire and getting warm while my sister and her husband socialized with the crowd of people who populated the camp. At one point she wandered over and offered me a small piece of chicken that she had been gifted, which I forced down, hoping food might help settle me a little.
When my sister was ready to move on, we wandered back towards the lights and sounds. I stopped for a moment, trying to explain to my sister that something was wrong - that I was tripping way too hard. I couldn't get anything but gibberish to come out of my mouth.
We eventually stopped in front of one of the heated domes, and my sisters husband went inside. I stood outside, on the verge of tears, and it was then my sister realized something was wrong. She walked over and enveloped me in a hug.
I broke down. Everything that had been pent up inside of me since the beginning of the weekend came rushing out like a waterfall. As I cried into her shoulder, I gurgled out my insecurities in broken sentences. My worries for my best friend back at home, who has been going through rough times. My worries for my friend I had brought with me (it was his first time at anything like this) and how I felt like I had abandoned him. My worries about my relationship with my boyfriend. All of it just flew out of me. When I finally stopped crying, I was shaking and drained. I left my sister and returned to my tent to lay down.
At this point things become fuzzy. I have no idea of how long I laid there, writhing and overwhelmed. It was probably only a couple hours, but it felt like years and years and years. Finally, miraculously, things started to calm down
Finally, miraculously, things started to calm down
, and I was able to sit up, get dressed into warmer clothing, and make my way out of my tent again.
I very slowly wandered to the communal fire where I started this rollercoaster of an adventure, and there was my sister and her husband, chatting it up with a group of mutual friends. She walked over and gave me a hug. At this point I was also given several more drops of THC tincture, a cigarette, and I consumed the rest of my THC edible.
After readjusting to the sights and sounds around me, my sister and I made our way to one of the heated yurts. Everyone inside except for a small group of tripping people was asleep. My sister and her husband cuddled up under some blankets, and I joined the small group of awake people.
Sitting in the yurt with familiar people, talking lightly and smoking hookah, I felt the best I had all night. The soft, rainbow LEDs that lit the room swirled in soft, friendly waves, and the hookah filled me with a warm sort of comfort. I stayed mostly quiet, listening to conversation and idly drawing with a UV laser on some glow in the dark paper.
Shortly before sunrise I said my good nights and wandered back to the fire. Another small group of dedicated campers huddled around it, too tired to do anything else, but too cold to go to sleep. I joined them, and we sat and talked and laughed until well after sunrise. As people started to trickle to bed, I headed that way as well, and quickly fell into a deep slumber.
I woke up feeling hazy and tired, my head stuffed to the brim with the wild adventure I had had the night before. I had definitely learned a lesson - just because something worked once, doesn't mean it's going to work again, and don't assume how your body is going to react to something.
Overall, while there were definitely some rough patches, this was a positive learning experience that I will not soon forget.
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