Citation: Squidge. "Ultimate Positivity: An Experience with 4-AcO-DMT (exp104781)". Erowid.org. May 21, 2019. erowid.org/exp/104781
It was an unusually hot day for October in Manchester and I was all set for an afternoon at the city centre's Diwali festival, followed by a spot of shopping and then a wonderful meal seated on comfortable couches on the terrace, in the exquisite company of my 18 year old daughter, her friend, my house mate and my 'partner in psychedelic.' We all decided not to drink and instead enjoyed each others company straight and sober. My daughter and her friend were talking about a blotter they'd been given but they weren't sure what it was. This led into an informative conversation of psychedelics, mainly led by friend who is knowledgeable in shamanic drugs. My daughter and her friend agreed not to take the blotter and instead we would introduce them to a controlled dose of changa at a later date. My friend also said she had some 4 ACO that she thought they'd like to try. All in all the night was a success and we left the terrace and parted ways, all feeling very positive and excited for our upcoming changa experience; which would be my first drug experience with my daughter.
I have described the start of my experience, as I feel the positive and wonderful day that I had, definitely made my first experience on 4 AcO -DMT such an amazing experience. So, my daughter and her mate went out (11pm. Oh to be young), my house mate went to bed and my friend and I went to hers to pick up some supplies. My friend (we'll call her Pixie) continued the chat we'd had with my daughter. I told her that I was cool with her getting hallucinogens for my daughter, but only after I'd experienced the drug first. I'm 41, I tried my first hit of LCD when I was 15. I've experimented with recreational drugs ever since. I've smoked hash on a daily basis for 25 years and probably have ecstasy or MDMA once a month. I've tried ketamine, opiates, changa, and mushrooms. The last time I'd done LSD was 19 years ago, mushrooms I'd last had in Amsterdam 12 years ago. I only drink alcohol probably 3/4 times a year. Tonight I was going to try 4ACO to check its suitability for my daughter!
Tonight I was going to try 4ACO to check its suitability for my daughter!
We arrived back at my house and had 17mg in a capsule. We settled on my couch (known as one of the comfiest couches in existence) and had a cup of tea and a smoke of the finest pollen. We were both still in such positive moods. Pixie was suffering a back injury and had positioned herself in a cocoon like structure. Whilst I waited, I read up on the make up of this drug. After about 30 minutes my body felt amazing. It was as though I could feel my blood moving through my body. I became so body aware, then a euphoric rush, much like the high quality ecstasy rushes that I'm used to.
We were discussing how great we felt, how positive and what a perfect day it had been. I looked up and the visuals had arrived. They were subtle to start, a light hue of colour, blues changing into greens and mauves... It was very pretty. My eyes weren't staying focused, they were darting everywhere. Pixie was loving it, I was too but we both agreed they were very mild, and not as good as mushrooms. Then I closed my eyes. The vast black backdrop was a kaleidoscope of colour, moving into tall towers, the space was ever expanding and it felt like if I allowed it, really focused and be able to travel through it, or with it. I asked pixie her thoughts, she seemed to think there was nothing spiritual, no learning, just pure unadulterated fun. I told her that I think it could be both and would have to try this drug again, on my own, in nature... For now I'll go down the shared fun option with her.
I opened my eyes and things started to get silly. My curtains had seemingly changed material, becoming bewitched. Almost see through, seductive, dream like. There was a mark on my mirror, the mark became a trapped spirit that wanted to come out but I wasn't sure how to help. I looked at Pixie, she actually turned into a pixie type creature, looking ready to cause mischief. Then the laughter came...
We were laughing so much, we were crying tears of hallucinogenic rivers. We found this term so funny that we could not stop, even once we did, pixie told me the river of tears were still flowing. I touched my face and they were...
We we're definitely peaking... I was loving this drug. This rainbow-ness of loveliness, the simplicity of it, the positive-ness of it, it seemed like I could never go under on it; like I have with microdot acid and white windowpanes. We decided it would be better if we could all have joint conscious minds, why couldn't we communicate through feeling, understanding. I thought we should collect our river of hallucinogenic tears and run them into our water system and then everyone would feel as positive as us. This set the tears of laughter off again.
My daughter and her friend returned, their night had not stayed positive, they were in rubbish moods. I explained our altered state... All for the love and safety of her experimental drug journey. And we all agreed they shouldn't do them at this point but instead on a different day. They then tried insisting which music we listen to and asking us questions. I was talking but know I was making no sense. But in my head it all made perfect sense. My daughter and her friend went to bed, pixie and I looked around and wondered in amazement at how we'd made such a mess. We'd not moved in over 3 hours off the couch, but the mess was everywhere... We also marvelled at how dirty our fingernails were... A trait of LSD that I've always found.
I proceeded to tidy up, aware of how great I felt, the visuals were calming down, as I cleared the mess I stepped into water, there was no spilt glass but a trail of water between pixie and I. This set off our giggles again as we realised we really had cried a river of tears...we had laughed so so much. We had a good discussion about shared consciousness and how the benefits of this could allow the power of positive thinking could heal the world. We then decided that we need to start experimenting more on the new and exciting drugs we keep hearing about. We made a list of things to try and decided to become partners in psychedelics.
And we're back... The effects of the 4 ACO had ended, very suddenly, very cleanly, one minute we were in an altered state, the next we had come down. Perfect.
one minute we were in an altered state, the next we had come down. Perfect.
We had a joint and both fell asleep.
We woke up, got showered and dressed and I went to drive pixie home. The sun was out and it was glorious sunshine. We sat in her back smoking pollen, drinking tea and reflecting. The bit that I really loved was the clearness of my head, the clarity of thought was amazing. We both decided it felt like the 4 ACO had travelled through every part of our body, cleaning it out, unclogging all our connections, we likened it to a defrag that a computer should go through. And once a computer has had a defrag it works at a better, clearer speed. So to keep our bodies and minds clear we have decided it would be prudent for us to have this drug every 3 months or so.
I hope I've described my experience in a way that benefits. I am more than happy for my daughter to try this, as I can't see how her experience can be negative. She is going to wait and do it with pixie and I, out in nature.
Since this experience I have tried some other psychedelics; one which was a 24 hour commitment. I will write up my experiences on these at a later date as I am still processing the intensity of it.
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