DOSE:	200 mg	oral	Pharms - Sertraline	(daily)
	1 hit	sublingual	LSD	(blotter / tab)
	repeated	smoked	Cannabis

BODY WEIGHT:

78 kg

I was on 200mg of sertraline (for my pure O OCD) at the time of this trip, so I thought I would test if my ability to trip had been affected in any way. This was the first time I had taken LSD but had experience with other drugs. Lots of methylphenidate, weed since forever, cocaine (it replaced my methylphenidate habit, horrible drug in my eyes), alcohol, MDMA a few times and n-bome-25-I.

There were a couple of psychological and emotional issues I wanted to feel and reflect upon while tripping. I wrote a list of the various problems, as a guide. The list included: accepting my ego and potentiating the various abilities I enjoyed practicing and/or percieved as useful, my weed addiction which had gotten a bit out of hand, my tendency to avoid difficult circumstances instead of facing them to the best of my abilities and a couple of other things.

The tiny tab was in the freezer. I put it in my wallet and prepared some sandwiches since I had decided to go hiking in the beautiful mediteranian woods that surround my village. I strolled up to the beginning of the path that led into the rich vegetation and placed the hit of acid under my tongue. The walk was peaceful and relaxing.

A massive tree cast its shadow on the ground, I sat between its roots and meditated for a while. I continued my journey onwards, nowhere in particular. A clearing appeared in the woods that gave way to grassy fields. They were soft and inviting, so I lay down and ate half a sandwich.

The effects started to come on so subtly that I didn’t realise I was tripping until the trip was in full swing. I decided to walk to the “coffee shop” in the next village along and smoke a spliff, since I was hardly feeling the effects and an hour had gone past already, or so I thought. As I left the woods I was greeted by the sound of the cars and lorries driving down the motorway. It was really windy and I started to feel as if the wind was lifting me off the ground, as if gravity had been turned down. There was a tunnel that led you under the motorway. As I passed through it, I made noises and the echos seemed to take longer to come back. It was Tuesday so the industrial complex on the other side was busy. I saw all these people working and driving lorries, I realised that they were struggling to survive and that the fruit of their effort was being stolen by their bosses. At that moment, I wanted to live in a commune or something. But I knew that the rich didn’t give up their privileges easily. A feeling of acceptance flooded my soul and I realised I just had to get on with my life. I couldn’t wait to get back home and prepare the english lessons for my students. Then the sensory input overwhelmed my thought process and the immediate reality around me occupied all my mental space.

I sat on a bench in a shopping center that was nearly empty and drank some water. Looking in my rucksack I found a pair of sunglasses and was really excited to stumble across them. I put them on and went in a supermarket. I wanted to eat a mango but thought it would be a bit messy so I bought some strawberries instead. To my dismay they were not as nice as I had imagined, they were out of season so they were kind of watery.

Finally I reached the coffee shop, thinking it would be open because I had set off at 1 o’clock and felt as if I must have been wandering through the woods for a good 4 hours at least. But no, it was only 3:30. At this point I became a bit disorientated, so I just ambled round the village looking at people and things. The lazy afternoon sun poured slowly down the streets filling the atmosphere. I felt so lucky to be alive, and saw all the little tangible and intangible details that I had been ignoring recently. The sertraline had been leaving me kind of numb emotionally and the LSD reconnected with this plethora of feelings. I was getting goosebumps because of the wind, my whole being had become an extremely sensitive entity.

I sat down on a wall in a park. On the other side of the wall there was a 6 or 7 meter drop, I gazed down. After a while I got a bit scared because I thought I might fall or jump, so I decided to go to a museum but it was closed.

Everything seemed more alive than usual, I could feel the trees breathing. The bark made wonderful patterns, like celtic designs. I hugged it and wished it luck. Just beyond the tree there was a young lad playing with his dog, they were having so much fun and it was such a simple and fulfilling happiness.

I made it back to the coffee shop. At first I was a bit apprehensive to go in, because the people knew me and I didn’t want to tell them I was tripping balls. They must have seen there was something up with me, but I’m quite weird normally so maybe not. I bought some California orange and rolled up. God, the taste! It was like drinking freshly squeezed orange; The juices of mother nature’s pussy.

A mate asked me if I wanted to play table football. I doubted for a second but then thought fuck it! Let’s play. We won 3 times in a row (which was surprising), I was really agitated at times because it was overstimulating, and I couldn’t keep track of everything that was happening. But there were certain moments that played before me in slow motion, and I could control the ball with great precision. People’s expressions were also in slo mo.

At this point, I felt really high. I continued to smoke and got higher and higher and higher. This guy sitting next to me had a bit of snot coming out of his nose, but I wasn’t sure if it was part of his nose or not, so I didn’t say anything. But then someone pointed it out and I said “so it was a bit of snot”. Luckily they were stoners and didn’t mind too much, but I felt embarressed. The mate with whom I had played table football, asked if I wanted to go to the cinema. I was like “great, is it discount day today”. He said “I don’t know, but I was talking about the projector in the other room”. We chilled out on the sofas. His face started to desintegrate very slowly into fractals. His features created a symmetric pattern that made him look like an indian deity. I lost track of time and thought I might miss the bus, so I said goodbye and made my way to the bus stop. But as I was leaving I ran into a wall and got a bit lost. A women said “what are you laughing at?” I continued to laugh thinking of a response but nothing came to mind so I said “nothing”.

The bus trip induced a trance. I got off at my stop and contemplated the horizon as the sun was going down. The colours were mind-boggling. I saw a certain number of shades but the longer I looked the more I could zoom in and more nuances came to life.

I got back home and hugged my Grandma. She was pleased to see me, but saw something weird in my eyes. Possibly the massive black holes that engulfed my irises. I went upstairs and talked with my aunt about her problems with her mother and her ex-boyfriend. We really connected and she opened up more than usual. She smelt the pungent weed smoke on my clothes when we hugged and laughed. I made myself some dinner, just soup and the left over sandwich. I enjoyed this meal so much and have enjoyed food much more since this experience, life in general. Everything I took for granted before, I appreciate profoundly now. The mango was the icing on the cake. I had forgotten I had one in the fruit bowl and ate it slowly as if it were a gift from the gods. I reflected that everything religion has classified as heavenly is actually from this earth, and that this classification has subtracted importance from this reality. It’s through existing fully here that spiritual fullfilment is achieved.

I was feeling kind of burnt out, probably the weed. I went to the bathroom and was pleasantly surprised by my reflection, I breathed in deeply for a few minutes. My lungs filled up completely, and I felt my thirst for air quenched. But breathing deeply was so nice I just kept on inhaling with my belly. It was giving me life! The hot shower made me tremble with pleasure. I could feel every droplet on my skin. I could have just melted there and then. Being naked was wonderful, I felt as if my skin and flesh fitted just perfectly. I dried off and lay on my bed. There’s a painting on my wall of a stream, a cow, a village and mountain in the background. The paint was slowly dripping, dense and deep in colour. Sleeping was difficult so I took a couple of benzos and floated into the realm of dreams.

I woke as fresh as a rose, reborn and more me than ever.

Since then the obsessive thoughts have been less intrusive and I don’t overthink things so much. I haven’t smoked weed since the trip and I’m feeling much wittier as a result. Life has more meaning and I feel genuinely happy without drugs. Life is the best drug.

Exp Year: 2015	ExpID: 105706
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 21
Published: Mar 5, 2021	Views: 585
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LSD (2) : Combinations (3), First Times (2), Public Space (Museum, Park, etc) (53)