DOSE:

1 capsl

oral

MDMA

BODY WEIGHT:

110 lb

A lot of people are afraid of psychedelic drugs because of “ego death”. I’ve done psychedelics several times in the past and never really experienced what I would call ego death, more like an overwhelming of the senses with the contents of the mind – which I think might be the opposite of ego death.

But recently I did experience ego death when I popped a Molly, and it was nothing like I expected or could have ever anticipated. It was very pure stuff and my best friends roommate hooked me up. I went out to a club to celebrate a friend’s birthday and just felt bad vibes all around. I decided to go back to my friend’s house and chill. I started thinking about my family and started having overwhelming fear – a normal experience for me whenever I think about them, well at least before now. I thought about them and I was flooded with lots of different fear based emotions like worry and resentment.

All of a sudden I heard a voice, a still quiet voice, or maybe it was an intuition, a pure thought from God, I don’t know, but I heard something say “breathe into your heart.” So this is what I did. I took deep breathes into my heart. I slowly began to recognize the difference between the heart and the mind. The mind is the architect but the heart leads. If the mind leads it is chaotic. The heart feels the world for itself, it seeks its own reflection. The heart always leads us to love. Keep in mind that I’m talking about the physical organ that is beating inside of your chest. I went outside and sat on the porch and gazed up at the trees, flooded with the Sacred Epiphany. That everything and everyone just wants to be loved, seen and appreciated. That’s it. That is the Answer to Why. History was created by the mind, but we are entering a world that will be created by the Heart. If we are led by our Heart we will experience miracles. I’ve experienced many miracles in my life, and they were all in the presence of great love.

This experience I consider true ego death, because I no longer believed my ego. I know that the mind creates illusions – perhaps illusions isn’t the right world. The mind is the hands, the Heart is the head. Everything exists within the Heart. The Heart is powered by Love, that is its fuel. When we appreciate the Heart, we appreciate love and we appreciate miracles. When you feel uncomfortable, breathe into your Heart. There you will find the peace that surpasses all understanding. This is why the mind is so afraid of love. Because love is infinite. The mind cannot grasp infinity. It can only grasp mathematics. But you can experience love, the infinite love and infinite grace. Walk with your chest out. Stop smoking. Eat more garlic. And breathe into your Heart. I love you.

Exp Year: 2015	ExpID: 106842
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: 30
Published: May 8, 2019	Views: 595
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MDMA (3) : Entities / Beings (37), General (1), Various (28)