Citation: Shamanic Goals. "Gateway to InnerOuter Space: An Experience with DMT (exp107046)". Erowid.org. Mar 25, 2021. erowid.org/exp/107046
||(powder / crystals)
This report will include my 2 most recent experiences with DMT, I write it at a friends house as he reads along, this will be my first time sharing these experiences on a public level.
Some backstory on me, I have had several experiences with hallucinogens, mushrooms being my first, followed by 2C-I, LSA, LSD, and finally, DMT. My first experience with DMT, however profound, will not be mentioned here.
Both of these experiences were in my home, which is very well set up for the ingestion of compounds like these, artwork and different colored lights lining the walls and tables. Many fantastic experiences, conversations, and spiritual debates have been had here, the vibe is very serene, and there is always some grade of psychedelic music playing to keep everything chill.
My co-worker and newfound psychonaut friend (C) and I decided to take a deep venture into the DMT world with questions in our mind's eye. We both had one full blast off experience under our belts, and I had smoked it on cannabis on a few occasions just to try and establish a relationship and level of understanding with the molecule, using smaller doses and purely experiencing the visual effects of it.
We were accompanied by my supplier, someone very experienced with this substance (T) he never really has much to say about his actual experiences, oddly enough, it was more of a religious thing (in a sense) to him.
We were using an 'oil-burner' style pipe which has a small amount of residue from me sharing this molecule with others, however I personally had never actually used this piece of glass, to be honest, I was pretty scared. My first experience was incredible, and I remembered a lot about it, but there was so very much I could not remember, which planted some seed of fear of the unknown that was stronger than what I had before I knew what to expect.
My supplier went first, didn't quite get where he wanted to, and decided to wait to go last to try again. C and I looked at each other both with a noticeable level of trepidation in our eyes, 'I'll go.' I said, and moved over to the papasan cushion with pillows stacked against the wall that was to be our 'launch pad.' C then in a moment of bravery (or weakness perhaps) suddenly asked if he could go next instead, I agreed. I'll not try to explain C's experience, but will instead move on to my own.
C decided to take notes on my experience, it truly helped me recall this whole thing top to bottom, and I highly recommend if you have a sitter that is willing, to have them do this. I had loaded 50 mg of this, just barely not white, fluffy powder into the pipe already, and had a butane torch on the lowest setting at hand, through trial and error with friends I had practically perfected the technique of getting it all vaporized in one toke. I brought the question into my head, and sort of prayed the DMT lead me into a means of understanding.
Another friend had recently introduced me to the 'Flat Earth Conspiracy' and mind you, I'm not one who is easy to sway, I had however through my own research found some very interesting and compelling mathmatical equations that had essentially sparked my curiosity to a degree that, in hopes of achieving some level of understanding, I found myself asking this substance to propel my consciousness to a place where I could hopefully obtain some sort of esoteric information. Boy, did I get what I asked for, and then some.
I melted the material down, brought the pipe to my lips, carefully applied the flame, and inhaled like it was going to be my last, long, fateful breath, still with these 'Flat Earth' ideaoligies in mind. As always, the effects began to take hold before I was even done finishing my inhalation, I closed my eyes, layed back, and held for as long as I could hold it. When I finally exhaled, it felt very loud and dramatic, and the slightly noticeable effects on the backs of black eyelids suddenly exploded into color.
Immediately I lost touch with my body, and ribbons of neon orange-pink-green materials that I can only explain as being 'DMT-textures' began swirling everywhere. I tried to blink, or something like blinking, and I realized that I was actually breathing, I could hear it, but I could not comprehend what was happening, I was reflexively doing anything to try and comprehend everything I was seeing. Finally though, things slowed down (probably because my breathing slowed down) and I realized I was looking at a city park. People were walking their dogs, sitting on benches, wearing hats, but at the time none of this made any sense to me at all.
Things zoomed backward, and I became aware that I was inside of some bulb-shaped room, and I became somewhat overwhelmed with the sensation of being able to see all sides of things, like the walls were my eyes, and I could see every aspect of everything inside this room. I now realize that what was once the park I was looking at is now our entire planet, stretched out to look like a landscape from a tabletop miniature war game, with all the mountains jutting up and the oceans held in by a ring of ice.
I now begin taking into account all of the details of the room, beginning to understand I see that the 'walls' of this room appear veiny, like the petals of a flower. The 'legs' of this 'table' that are holding up the world, are actually hands, whose arms come down from the veins of these flower petal walls. The hands have a black symbol on the backs of them that resembles the Horde symbol from World of Warcraft (took me awhile to figure that out actually).
So as I am finally registering all of these details, it becomes apparent to me that I am inside the bulb of a flower that is getting ready to bloom, and the earth is the pistil of this flower, pushing towards the top. In an intense magnitude of light, the top of the bulb bursts open, and all of mankind ascends into the heavens. It literally brings me the feeling that I am witnessing our universe as a single flower bulb on the tree of life, and I was lucky enough to see the most beautiful part.
Finally as the light of everything dims, I realize I am coming down, I open my eyes to see my familiar house, my two friends, and I am still hallucinating harder than I ever have on LSD (pretty hard). I ravenously recount my experience to my friends worried that I might lose some piece of it, C is amazing at taking notes, however I found that I retained almost all of this experience without much issue.
I am left with a feeling that the experience was complete, I was able to see in my DMT state the Earth as being flat, along with this message that we are being propelled toward this blooming experience of ascension towards something greater.
My next experience was a little over a week later, C and I wanted to to have a DMT session propel us into an LSD trip, same set and setting, but my girlfriend is in place of my supplier. I went into this experience, again, asking for something from the substance. I asked for questions, ideas, things to ponder, food for thought if you will, and once again, the DMT provided...
I went first this time, taking my seat on the 'launch pad' I held the pipe, once again loaded with 50 mg of the same fluffy powder. This time however, I had no fear, I was purely excited and without hesitation, this would prove to be a bit of a folly.
As I was holding my toke and laying down, the ribbons of color once again began to swirl, I was propelled, much harder than last time, into an infinitely larger space. I became aware that I was in the presence of an entity, something I had never experienced before, and in that moment of lucidity, I felt what I thought was my heart stop. Some part of me reached out to my corporeal body, for fear that I was actually dying, and the entity noticed.
The entity made its entire self apparent to me, and this was no mere 'entity,' this was the God Head, this was all conscious non-matter, and it was very upset that I was no longer 'letting go,' the amazing greens and pinks changed to very hostile reds and greys, I felt the full pressure of this thing's consciousness bearing down on me, forcing me to relax and let go. I apologized to it with every ounce of my being, and it forgave me. It smiled, and in a way, 'told' me 'It's ok, now I know what you need to see.' Everything faded away, and I watched my consciousness shoot back to the material plane.
I did not return to my body however, I only returned to the room where my body was, back in my house, but everything looked vastly different. I couldn't see my companions, but I could see my body, except instead of being me, it was a pale skinned ape, with a dark, powder blue hair covering its body (my body). My third eye blazingly open, emitting a powerful yellow-white light and my hands and feet in the air like a newborn in a crib, confused and unaware.
Again I find myself experiencing this feeling of seeing all sides of things, like a 4D being in a 3D world, understanding more than even the beings inhabiting the space. I also begin seeing things through the eyes of the ape (me) at the same time, and during this time I become aware that I can feel my body as well now, still seeing these intense shapes and energies around me, completely unable to see my house as I'm used to seeing it.
The 'all-sides' sensation fades and I am purely in my body now, I begin moving and talking, making very strange hand gestures that resemble some mix between mudras and gloving, uttering incomprehensible whispers to my trip-mates. C asks me a question, it is so boomingly loud and resounding that I can't understand it. I start noticing that my hand gestures are actually interacting with these weird balls of energy floating around my living room, sometimes I eat one, sometimes I swirl one around and then push it away.
These energy balls, I come to understand, were my experiences, feelings, thoughts, every part of my human experience I had ever had in this room, I could see, in some diffracted way that only I could understand. Finally I begin blinking, the lights in the room become noticeable first, then shapes, patterns, and finally my friend and girlfriend. I do my best to recount what happened, I ask about my strange movements. They tell me that I looked like I was doing some sort of mix between a sun salutation and some ancient lost martial art. I guess this makes sense considering what I was seeing.
All in all, I wasn't able to make much of any sense of this initially, which is funny, because it took me awhile to remember that I had actually gotten, once again, exactly what I wanted from the DMT, intense, profound questions. So much to understand, comprehend, and process. The one thing I truly learned was that some degree of fear is necessary, it is ingrained into our instincts to help us survive, to prolong life as long as possible to make sure that we accomplish something that helps promote humanity towards the blooming of this flower we call our universe, towards our ascension.
These experiences, especially the latter one, truly gave me a new lease on life, an abundance of new perspective. I am wholly grateful that I found this substance, it has become my goal to in some way help establish this as medicine, and to try and help people, with or without it, to promote the ascension of humanity. Keep in mind there are many details left out, either because words can not define them, I can't properly place them, or they aren't truly to the point of the experience. Ineffable is truly the only word to describe these experiences.
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