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The One Time X Worked
Ecstasy
by Retox
Citation:   Retox. "The One Time X Worked: An Experience with Ecstasy (exp1074)". Erowid.org. Oct 13, 2000. erowid.org/exp/1074

 
DOSE:
T+ 0:00
1 tablet oral MDMA (pill / tablet)
  T+ 1:00 1 tablet oral MDMA (pill / tablet)
  T+ 1:30 1 tablet oral MDMA (pill / tablet)
  T+ 2:30 1 tablet oral MDMA (pill / tablet)
  T+ 3:30 1 tablet oral MDMA (pill / tablet)
  T+ 4:30 1 tablet oral MDMA (pill / tablet)
  T+ 5:30 2 tablets oral MDMA (pill / tablet)

BODY WEIGHT: 250 lb


The first couple of times I Tried X I was disappointed - the pills were 'weak' and everything I had read about wan't happening for me. Then one day I stumbled across Green CK's that changed my mind (literally) and proved that good X was worth the wait.... The plans for this ride had been made a week before. When Friday night arrived, I had 6 good friends (all of whom had 'rolled' before) and 8 pills (for myself) to play with.

I patiently awaited the onset after eating one pill, which after nearly an hour was having no effect on my body or mind. So I ate another (with another half glass of water), and began waiting once again. Thirty more minutes passed and still nothing. Here I was almost an hour and a half 'into it' and I felt nothing. All of my friends were head first into the 'roll' and I could see by their reactions and lovingly euphoric moods that the pills were indeed very real, they just weren't kicking in for me. Another half hour passed, and the decision to eat a third pill just seemed like the right thing to so.

Not more than 10 minutes after taking the third pill everything hit me. Suddenly, without warning the roll began, teeth clenched, slight visual tracers, I felt warm and cold at the same time, and an overwhelming feeling of contentedness with the world. Sitting in front of my computer, it was as if the colors on the screen 'came alive'. Not long after the roll began, a couple of my friends came into the kitchen where I was sitting, even from a distance they could tell I was 'in the zone.'

The three hours that followed were enlightening to say the least. I experienced an incredible increase in mental clarity. My breathing became very deep, as if with each breath I was inhaling all of the good in the world, and when I exhaled it was as if someone reached into the freezer for some ice - the sound was intense, very loud - very pleasant. A warm, tingly 'body buzz' ensued, and it felt like I was glowing, radiating warmth through an invisibile aura surrounding my body. This ride was amazing - I thought it could get no better, until one of my friends came up and touched me, and began giving me a neck-rub.

His fingers were truly incredible - the sensation of being touched was intense, almost as if he was massaging my soul and body at the same time. I couldn't believe how these tiny little pills had transformed my reality into something much larger than life. Once the initial shock of feeling that good passed, I allowed myself to drift further into the roll by 'letting go' and allowing the drug to take control. While the first half hour of my X-perience was 'tentative' (as I found myself trying to think too much and analyze the drug's effect on me) the hours that followed were nothing short of remarkable.

About an hour into roll, I told my friends not to talk to me, or touch me - the feelings I was experiencing were so overwhelmingly pleasant, I wished they would never end. I sat still and quietly in front of the computer and popped in a house/techno CD and turned it way up. Focussing on nothing but the music - the deep bass rhythms became my pulse. I had heard this CD dozens of times before - but not like this - the music came alive.

Over the next 5 hours, I managed to eat 5 more pills, and stayed 'in the zone' the entire time. While most of my friends were dancing and pacing around the house, hugging each other every 90 seconds, I was content to stay in my chair, music pulsing through every cell in my body.

When the roll started to subside, I got up from the computer and stretched, inhaling deeply, and pondered my next resting spot. The couch looked good to me, so I curled up with a comfortable pillow and a blanket - and lay my tired body down to rest. Although I had hardly moved all night, my body was physically drained, my mind was enjoying the 'afterglow' - and my mind was still flying at 100 miles an hour. I thought alot in the hour that followed, reflecting on my life, career, and family. Everything made sense - perfect and complete sense, and I could not have felt more loved and fulfilled as I lay there motionless on the couch.

The most amazing thing that came out of this roll was a new found sense of direction. Somewhere in the X-perience, I came to know a different, loving, and peaceful side of myself. When I 'came back', I was different - I liked myself, and saw my life in a completely new light.

Since that first 'good' or 'real' roll, I have set aside one night each weekend to try and return to and recapture that feeling. It is my time for me - my gift to myself. I try and do something new each weekend while I am rolling - as if I am an explorer in a new world, seeing things for the first time. To date, I can tell you that taking a hot shower in the dark is as relaxing as it is intense. My favorite X-time has become riding (not driving) around town and seeing it as only X could allow you to do. And, if you're lucky enough to be the first one at the tracks when a freight train goes by - open both windows and try to stare straight ahead. The combination of the visuals with the sounds of the train - in a word - intense!

In the weeks that have followed - I am still trying to acheive that same level of physical and mental pleasure that I did the first time I really rolled. I am beginning to think that it's just not possible. Don't get me wrong - I have enjoyed the weeks since then and their varied degrees of 'rolls' - but none have compared to the beauty of my 'first time.'

Sure it's dangerous, risky, and illegal - experimenting like this with one's body and mind..... But if you can really let go of yourself, even if for 3-4 hours, you'll be amazed where the X can take you - God knows I was.

Exp Year: 2000ExpID: 1074
Gender: Not Specified 
Age at time of experience: Not Given 
Published: Oct 13, 2000Views: 1,913
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MDMA (3) : Small Group (2-9) (17), Glowing Experiences (4)

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