Citation: magiqksquirrel. "Meeting the Melting Mysticism: An Experience with 1P-LSD (exp108914)". Erowid.org. Aug 1, 2016. erowid.org/exp/108914
||(blotter / tab)
It was a golden day, and a spontaneous decision to eat a square. I had been waiting for a very long time, you could even say years, to finally put this little bit of cardboard under my tongue and it finally felt right to do it. I was going to take one tab by myself and go to Bath and walk around the botanical gardens and up to Victoria Park and see where I was taken. Thankfully, two of my best friends caught wind of this and came with me. They kept me safe and grounded and I am very glad they were there. Had they not been I know I would have had a wild adventure but who’s to say how it would have gone down. Had they not been there think I would have ended up staring at the sunset until it disappeared and I think I would have felt very lonely afterward.
So at around 2pm I gathered some supplies, two chocolate bars, a coat, a hoody, a 2 litre bottle of Ribena water, my iPod and headphones, a book: the Doors of Perception and 4mg of etizolams (AKA trip killers, just in case).
I live in a fairly busy city and I didn’t want to be anywhere near this place when on acid - there isn’t nearly enough nature or space here, so I took the train to the far calmer town next door which I know very well and feel very safe and familiar in. My intention was to go to the botanical gardens, so I got on a train and put the tab under my tongue and kept it there for a good ten minutes. Oddly enough, this train journey I was so used to felt unfamiliar, it took me longer than usual to recognise where we were along the track and I couldn’t tell if it was placebo or it actually kicking in very subtly already.
I got off the train. The sun was warm. I began heading up to the gardens and the park and was feeling excited, confident and content. The walk was uneventful but pleasant, I was smiling most of the way, mainly from anticipation and excitement. Got a text from my pals and they said they were on their way. By the time I got to the foot of the park I could feel it. First in my fingers, like a very slight twitch, and then on my lips. The plants were beautiful, of course, but they always are. Twice along the path I noticed Narcissus flowers and both times I saw them and they were small and shrivelled whilst everything else around them bloomed and towered, and I couldn’t help but draw parallels to narcissistic personalities, something that was entirely apt for the situation one of my friends was in (my friend not being the narcissistic party, by the way). It was beginning to get slightly more vivid.
I went further up into the gardens, and here you meet a gate, a road and another gate. This leads into quite a special little hideaway full of very old trees and two stone monuments and I don’t think it would be outrageous to say this area has a sentient hum to it. I used to go there quite a lot when I was on my own, it’s a cool place for peace and quiet but it’s not uncommon for people to walk through. I sat down on the stone monument and looked up, appreciating the trees. No visuals yet, just heightened colour. My pals found me, they are an awesome couple let’s call them A and G, and they jokingly tried to spook me out when they arrived by making strange animal noises and trying to sneak up on me. We caught up a little, they asked me what I was feeling, which I wasn’t very good at describing but I think I essentially said “I feel good”. I gave G half a tab, he’d had acid before so knew what to expect. A didn’t take any and kept us safe. G was excited, he always is!
We stayed in this spot for about 10-15 minutes until some kid in the distance started making a racket with his scooter and it was time to go. We walked out toward Victoria Park, a lush field with a good view, found a good spot and settled. I laid on my back with my shades on, staring at the wispy clouds in front of the lucid blue sky and then they started swirling. Turning into pretty fractals. They became very much alive and were moving very fluidly. When I moved my head I could move them in different directions. Strangely things on earth took a little longer to move; I could look at the earth and the sky simultaneously and the sky would still be going crazy but the earth would still look normal.
A left us briefly to get some food and G and I opened up my canned headphones and listened to music out of them. He asked me to listen to one of his songs whilst on acid to see what I thought. We both play music so I was admittedly a little apprehensive about it being the first song I fully immerse myself in whilst on acid. It was good though and we discussed how it had a soul to it it just needed to be edited slightly. I looked to my right and the silhouettes of the trees began to weave amongst themselves like spiderwebs.
We went for a wander after A came back and ate and the sun started setting. We walked again through the trees and they were magnificent, one tree trunk looked like it had glitched out and looking upward toward it’s canopy was even more surprising. The smells were gorgeous, typical scents of nature, I guess heightened but I didn’t notice them too much. We walked up higher and up a golf course where we found a spot. We looked all across the city. It was still daylight but the moon was out and you could see the full moon, the sun, the whole city, the trees and the sky all at once. We stared at a tree and spoke of how they are conscious, one tree in particular starting swaying and dancing in an incredible display. I think the acid revealed just how much they are moving, they are moving so much more than meets the eye. We spoke of love and a love in my life that was falling away, it was emotional to think about, I got a little choked up. Then G started messing with ‘the flow’ and spoke of how you can easily disrupt the flow by doing what isn’t expected of you. He was right and as he did this, the words in my head became very distorted and mixed up. Made up, melted words came to my head.
The sun was beginning to set and a gorgeous azure, scarlet melting pot was stirring in the sky. I would have loved to have seen us at this point, we would have looked pretty funny, carefree wanderers. We walked back through the city to head to the canal. I was constantly staring at the sky and looking up and all around in childlike wonder. This is where I could really feel the ‘Isness’ that Aldous Huxley describes so well in Doors of Perception. It’s a completely mystic sensation. It was innately peculiar and fantastically bizarre. There were question marks in everything. It was like ‘oh yeah’ and ‘huh?!’ both at the same time. I could feel the magic squirrels. My bag was full of them. I had felt them before ever so slightly on truffles but I could really feel them now. It’s hard/near impossible to describe what they are but I think they are the things that put everything together when you’re not looking.
We met up with a friend, D, when we arrived in town and it was good to see him. A walked us to the perfect bar for such a situation, it was quiet, comfortable, slightly enigmatic and very out the way. The four of us went outside to the bar’s garden area and sat down on a bench. There was nobody else in the garden, except an apple with a small bite out of it on the bench next to us. We had drinks and spoke of dreams and all sorts for an hour or so and then we went our separate ways. Just before we left we noticed the apple had seemingly a larger bite taken from it. G noticed it first. “D, you MUST have taken a bite from that apple”. D swore he hadn’t. I was ecstatic - I felt that the presence, whatever in all the heavens the presence was, that I had felt was watching us had made itself known. Maybe it was the magic squirrels. Only G and I seemed to find this an important revelation.
So we left and I walked off alone. My phone battery was dead. It was about 22:30 by this point. I had to get a train to get back to Bristol so I walked to the station. As I was coming up to it then train was pulling in. I ran but I missed it. This was a minor station and because it was late I couldn’t be sure another one would arrive so I had to walk back into town and go to the main station. I was frustrated at myself and paranoid because it was funnily enough 4/20, so I was worried there would be cops at the train station searching people for some reason. I got myself out of this negative thought loop, and knowing that the 1p-LSD I had on me was technically legal anyway I put worry aside.
When I got to the main station there were no trains. They had all long gone it seemed, the station was empty. I had to wait for a bus which felt like hours and there were some strange characters around. I went to an ATM and a girl dressed in gothic attire immediately made me feel uneasy (I’m sure she was lovely though, she didn’t do anything malicious whatsoever) and I could see how very quickly things could spiral out into a bad trip, even this late after taking the dose. Waiting for the bus was long and these two kids (15-17?) were going crazy with impatience and being very loud, vandalising things and drawing lots of attention to themselves. I tried to pay no attention and just listen to my music. On the bus I wrote down what I could and was just wishing I was home. The kids were banging on the windows at everyone who got off the bus. Eventually got to Bristol, got a taxi and was exceptionally relieved to be home. I highly recommend planning a good route home if you’re alone and on these love squares, it makes you pretty vulnerable when you are worried.
I excitedly greeted my girl and I was very bouncy whilst she was sleepy. It was late so we stuck on a show on the screen, I had no desire to watch it. Instead I just looked elsewhere around the room, it was more interesting. Eventually decided I had to settle and sleep though, so stuck on Adventure Time. The first episode was beautiful and the next episode was terrifying. I mean his guardian angel turned on him mid-rescue, just about the most terrifying thing my acid meddled brain could comprehend. It took me a very long time to get to sleep.
The rabbit hole really is the perfect encapsulation for what I experienced, and I felt I only dipped one toe inside it. ‘Curiouser and curiouser’. I can only transcribe the bits that really permeate me. One tab of 1P-LSD asked far more questions than it gave answers.
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