Citation: Jungbrother. "Seven Years On: An Experience with Spice-Like Smoking Blend (exp111436)". Erowid.org. Jan 11, 2018. erowid.org/exp/111436
(2017) It has taken me years to get over this experience and probably number one in my recovery has been my partner, number two has been exercise and number three has been finding a good job and getting good money.
I have spent a long time coming to grips with my negative spice experience and I think that writing about my experience may serve to either warn others of the danger of spice and potentially deter someone from trying spice who might have otherwise or assist someone in their recovery.
I will write the experience as accurately as I can however descriptions of the trip may be difficult to put into relatable words as it was an abstract experience. I will however try to describe recovery as well as I can - unfortunately this is the hardest bit however it is likely the most important bit.
It was my 19th birthday. I was living at university college with 300 other 18-19 year olds. I was really enjoying living out of home and meeting so many new friends at that place. My new friends has bought some 'Spice' or 'K2' not sure which it was however I use the two terms interchangeably. They had suggested over dinner that we head out to the ovals next to the college after dinner and smoke this synthetic weed. I excitedly agreed and postponed birthday cake with my floor mates to get 'high'.
We went to the ovals after dinner and excitedly took turns taking hits from the 'bucket bong' then waited at a nearby area for the effects to kick in. When my turn came around I filled the cone piece up fully, captured all the smoke from the burning 'Spice' effectively and burned the 'Spice' completely and efficiently. I captured all of the smoke in my lungs. In other words.. It was a big hit.
The effects were apparent rapidly and very noticeably. Firstly I became giddy and laughed hysterically and uncontrollably with and at my peers. I felt very self conscious and paranoid as is commonly experienced from getting really high. That was fantastic. Gradually I wandered further away from the group as I was feeling too self conscious. I was laughing during this time. Sporadically I would fall down ie loss of motor skills (as if I were very drunk). Gradually I would become unconscious for a period of time as my mind would be overtaken by a positive psychedelic experience. Gradually though as I became aware this was an uncontrollable experience. I stopped enjoying myself and completely lost my mind.
Experiencing loosing grip of reality is a very lonely and terrifying experience. I found myself unable to escape from the spectators who were watching me loose my mind (albeit they may have been having a similar experience, although I know that a couple of the girls were completely sober - I don't know what they think of me now and aren't really that concerned. If I were to talk to them about it I would be more interested in asking questions about my trip from their perspective as an outside perspective may change the way I perceive the event). The actual trip was a mix between extreme self consciousness, trying to negotiate with reality and be social and later descended into screaming into the sky 'kill me' kill me' as I thought I was the devil and was going to 'the dark place' again.
I will try and explain this. I can't remember the exact details of what happened, especially the sequence of events however I think it went something like this. The events mentioned before, an 'out of body experience' where I observed myself from above (birds eye view) with amazing clarify and detail I was able to control myself the concept is relatable to playing pokemon on a game boy. That was awesome and exciting and something I will never forget. I knew I was in trouble however and may have been asking other people for help. Another of the distinct experiences was my family arriving to help and settle me down. They all arrived. I remember feeling a lot of concern for me and I felt feelings of guilt and embarrassment. In my trip however my family were members of 'Veggie Tales' the christian cartoon. And my dad in this experience repeated the phrase 'weet woo' while thrusting his cucumber hips.
It was Weird.
The worst it yet to come however. Soon my vision turned into fractals and it was the most amazing most beautiful experience I have experienced. The colours were gold and shiny and deep and bright and colourful. It was truly an enlightening experience. This changed however as I started to focus on the black and darker colours. As experience shifted into the darker colors everything became pretty terrifying. I descended into hell. It was the worst most unimaginably bad place that a mind can enter. I fully relate in the unrelateable way that others have described their bad trips. I also have a very clear understanding of hell. It's way way worse than one can imagine. The devil can get you where you didn't even know existed. This was a bad place. Nobody is suppose to experience that place. It's so bad and so unrelatable to reality. I can't talk about it because no language exists to describe it. Apart from hell. But it's hell times 100 x, you can't imagine it. Nothing equips someone for the experience and further no tools or language exists for being in the aftermath. But one is still required to function as a human. It's tough. Honestly I believe life is hard for everyone and most people can relate to the struggle of life. Which is good and it's how I enjoy relating to people.
A traumatic experience, like the one described above however doesn't do any good. There is no tangible benefit to it however there are tangible disadvantages to it. If you have been pretty messed up by this drug I know your pain. I wish you all the best. You are on your own. It is as bad as you think. You will get better. Then you will get good.
Good luck, keep exercising.
COPYRIGHTS: All reports are copyright Erowid and you agree not to download or analyze the report data without contacting Erowid Center and receiving permission first.
Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the individual authors who submit them.
Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid Center.