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Didn't Care What Happened Around Me
Methylphenidate (Concerta)
by antonkarpov
Citation:   antonkarpov. "Didn't Care What Happened Around Me: An Experience with Methylphenidate (Concerta) (exp112328)". Erowid.org. Dec 13, 2018. erowid.org/exp/112328

 
DOSE:
36 mg oral Pharms - Methylphenidate (daily)

BODY WEIGHT: 100 kg


Year on Methylphenidate (Concerta)

I was diagnosed for ADD, got medication for it. Concerta (Methylphenidate). At first things were fine, I got things done like never before. I felt more efficient both at home and work. After a month I told my doctor that everything is fine, no side effects at all. How wrong I was...

My wife started to complain that I've changed, she told me I don't care about anything anymore. I don't listen to her and just ignore our kids. She warned me that she would leave me soon, if things don't get better. I just didn't get it. I was feeling better than ever, got promoted at work and felt fine. But finally it hit me. I got into a small accident and needed minor surgery on my hand. That accident had nothing to do with Concerta but I was scared my feelings. I have always had fear of blood and hospitals. Now I saw blood, flood of it running from my hand and I didn't care. I just didn't care.
I just didn't care.
I went to hospital, and felt nothing, just told what happened and asked them if they could fix it. I didn't feel fear or worry, nothing at all.

It was then I understood that this drug has taken away parts of my feelings, I was feeling good yes, but at the same time I didn't care what happened around me (my family) and even what happened to me (the accident). That hit me hard. I immediadly stopped taking Concerta but it was all too late. I was alienated from my family, had lost contact to them. It was too late to save my marriage. That drug cost me my marriage, the love of my life, everything that mattered to me.

Exp Year: 2017ExpID: 112328
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: 35 
Published: Dec 13, 2018Views: 1,037
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Pharms - Methylphenidate (114) : Retrospective / Summary (11), Medical Use (47), Not Applicable (38)

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