DOSE:

1 tablet

oral

MDMA

(pill / tablet)

BODY WEIGHT:

110 lb

I have taken E several times in the past two years. I have enjoyed most of my experiences although they seem to be getting more uncomfortable. The amount of time that I stay up does not seem to last as long or effect me as much spiritually as in the past and the feeling of complete discontent and lethargy at the moment I fall seems to impact me more.

I am not sure why this is happening. My main problem is the uncontrollable urge to do it again. I know that I will not enjoy it as much as I want but I can't seem to stop thinking about it.

People say over and over again that it is not addictive but then what is it that I am feeling? I also have the problem of realizing that all that I had “realized” during my trip was drug induced and meaningless. I don’t want to feel that way. My first time, I thought that all I was talking and thinking about was real, just harder for me to say and feel when I was sobber. Lately when I am high I don’t even want to talk because I feel that it is all bull. I want to do E again I just want the experience to be more worth it.

Exp Year: 2001	ExpID: 11265
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Dec 31, 2001	Views: 14,766
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MDMA (3) : Retrospective / Summary (11), Addiction & Habituation (10), Various (28)