DOSE:	120-150 mg	oral	MDMA
	100 mg	oral	Pharms - Trazodone	(daily)

BODY WEIGHT:

60 kg

First things first: I do not promote using any type of illegal psychoactive substances when on meds, as it may cause serious problems not only by making your illness worse, but in case of specific antidepressants like IMAO, can even cause a serotonin syndrome, which can be deadly. Always take this in consideration before using MDMA or any other substances.

I´ve been diagnosed with depression and anxiety about 3 years ago. Even before my mental illness got worse, I´ve had problems with society and going to parties as I always felt like the one who surely does not belong there. This have changed roughly 2 years ago, when I first tried ecstasy. I don´t want to repeat what have been said before by millions of people, all my problems suddenly faded away and I could enjoy the event on 100 %. Not being my first experience with these substances, I realized after the first use that taking ecstasy too often could be dangerous and so like 6 months after the first experience, I have made a promise to myself not to use it more than once in a month. These periods were, most of the time, longer than a month, in average I would say 2 months between each roll. I have also always tested my pills and searched for them on the internet to assume the actual amount of MDMA in the particular pill.

About one year ago (my total number of rolls at that time was 5), my mental problems got worse after a breakup and I got on meds – Trazodone in my case. These meds showed as very useful in my fight against the depression and anxiety. Despite I knew it was not the best idea to take MDMA while still on meds, I continued to do so and still apply my „only once in a month“ rule. From my personal experience, I have to say that it felt to me like Trazodone was lowering the potential of MDMA a little bit, but still had good rolls with 120-150mg / night. I did not want to use higher doses as I knew it would make the comedown even worse. In this case based on my experiences I have found that less is better.

During my rolls, it felt like they had shorter duration (about 2.5 to 3 hours instead of proclaimed 3 to 5 hours), with quicker built-up (which could be also a placebo) and rarely with vomiting. Its emphatic stage has slightly vanished. The second day I felt great and always decided not to take my meds right after the roll, as there was no or just a little serotonin left to reuptake. With the third day came the depression, which always took place for like 1 to 2 weeks. Piracetam seemed to be useful in these situations, taking 2400 mg two times a day.

Recently, I have found that maybe complete lack of MDMA in my life would be better for me, despite I love that feeling of being high from it. I have encountered that the proper stabilization of my serotonin levels to lower the impact of my illness took about 2-3 weeks after the roll completely broke them. During the summer holidays, when I had a 2 months break from MDMA, I now retrospectively think that I was feeling better and the AD was doing its job properly.

So, in conclusion, MDMA is (in my opinion) relatively safe when on Trazodone, I did not find records that it could have caused some serious problems, but it surely goes against the effects Trazodone or other antidepressants have on one's illness and should not be taken simultaneously. As I see it, MDMA have left an overall positive impact on my life and I do not regret using it.

Exp Year: 2018	ExpID: 112768
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 22
Published: Jan 24, 2019	Views: 1,094
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MDMA (3) : Retrospective / Summary (11), Depression (15), Combinations (3), Unknown Context (20)