Citation: Joan Clark. "I Was Surprised at the Strength: An Experience with Ibogaine (exp113307)". Erowid.org. Jun 30, 2019. erowid.org/exp/113307
This was Voacanga africana-derived Ibogaine. I did not want to contribute to the disappearance of the Tabernanthe iboga species. I previously tried microdosing Ibogaine HCl from this same batch over 15 days in increasing doses with the last day potentiated with Cannabis, and obtained some behavioral insights. I had trouble finding non-flood dosage reports for Ibogaine.
Drug Identification: High degree of certainty that the Ibogaine HCl was properly identified because the lab referral came from a well known Ph.D. and had numerous lab results on testing and a certificate. I performed no analysis or testing.
Measurement: I weighed it using a Gemini Series Precision Digital Milligram Scale (20G X 0.001G) made by American Weigh Scales.
Combinations / Food / Interactions: I started hunger and underfed for the day and ate a fair amount of carrot/ginger soup during the trip, plus a protein drink and water.
Supplements / Medications: None taken in days prior to the experience.
Set & Setting
I have some severe process/behavioral addictions that seriously degrade my life. So far, despite lots of inner work, many therapists, prescribed medications, journaling, dreamwork, somatic experiencing, yoga, meditation, etc., Iíve been unsuccessful in stopping the downward slide, which has become frightening. Searching for the root causes and more importantly, the solutions to my behavior were strongly on my mind.
Searching for the root causes and more importantly, the solutions to my behavior were strongly on my mind.
Iím a tall, thin vegan and took this 3 days after a short, but violent, intestinal flu. I took the Ibogaine without a sitter while alone in a friendís empty apartment. The apartment is small, cozy and comfortable and I felt at home. It has a small, but private beautiful zen garden, although I stayed inside. (Taking Ibogaine without a sitter is NOT recommended. It is dangerous and possibly deadly.) I had my phone, but didn't tell anyone what I was doing.
Temperature in the apartment where I journeyed was probably about 70 F. I listened to Steve Halpern type music for about 20 minutes, but then turned it off. I thought later to turn it back on, but lost that thought.
Emotional state: My boyfriend was refusing to contact me and sent me a text highly suggesting our relationship was likely very close to over. I had lots of thoughts around that and feelings of sadness, disappointment, frustration. But I was generally calm for me and such circumstances. I was motivated to do what was best for myself.
At 5:30 pm, I ingested 100mg of lab certified Ibogaine HCl, and resumed a sewing project. After an hour or so, I felt flushed, warm and tingly, especially in my forearms and face. My consciousness seemed more aware of my tinnitus, although I couldnít notice any change.
At 7:50 pm, I ingested another 254mg for a total of ~350mg. Within 15 minutes, I had no doubt I was feeling the effects.
By 8:30 pm, my tinnitus had extra noises including a repetitious sound. I saw tracers of the brighter lights as I would turn my head. When I first experienced the tracers, I alerted, because it seemed that something, perhaps a bat or large moth, was flying around in the room. The tracers were also unpleasant.
I felt generally capable of rational thought and mostly coordinated movement. But the tracers, sounds and bodily sensations were distracting when trying, for example, to get to and use the bathroom.
I felt flushed, hot and somewhat sweaty. I felt nauseous and wondered if I was going to vomit. My bowels got loose, although I had recently recovered from an intestinal flu. The bodily feeling was unpleasant, but did not cause any serious distress.
My heart rate elevated, but never scared me or was unduly intrusive or unpleasant. I felt thirsty and had, with the nausea, no appetite.
I turned most lights off and sat down in a comfortable position on the floor with a pillow against the couch and immediately started having many closed eye visuals/daydreams. After a bit, I felt like lying down and got into bed.
A couple of times, I got up to take care of things. My coordination had further degraded. A very short task that I was familiar with felt frustrating.
I laid down on the bed too hot to get under the sheets. It was odd I was that hot and opened some windows. With all lights out, I experienced many images from my childhood. I got insights that reframed my story of my childhood regarding my mother. I re-experienced a horrifying event of my father choking my pet dog. I saw many disembodied fists that were punching each other and solo fist that were coming at me. They seemed angry and violent. (I think of myself as a pacifist.) I heard my inner dialogue more clearly than usual.
I heard my inner dialogue more clearly than usual.
I was surprised at how angry and self-critical I was with myself. Several times, I heard me call myself ďStupid!Ē Of all the stuff I saw, I jotted down that we are trained consumers.
In my life, I have a deep sadness around my distant/nonexistent relationship with my brother. I saw many "pictures" of him at various ages with no memorable emotional content or message. As I type this, I wonder if I was resetting my mind to think of him in a more neutral way.
Urine seemed stinky. I was sensitive to light. I was guessing that I had nystagmus. I mostly felt lethargic with a heavy body.
By midnight, I was coming down quickly . . . or so I thought. I had been tripping at a friendís apartment (he was out of town). I got in my car and drove back to my place.
In bed by about 12:40pm, I realized that I could still feel the stimulant and was mostly awake tossing and turning until about 6 am. Around that time, I was still seeing some tracers. Yikes! I was then able to sleep for maybe 90 minutes and then finally got up and journaled.
This afternoon, I was generally productive at my desk for a few hours. Itís now 8 pm, 24 hours since my 250 mg booster. Over the last hour, the body high (tinnitus, slight tingly, feeling like my brain is in a different mode) has finally been diminishing. It could be a lull in the waves, or maybe the noticeable effects are about over. I hope I sleep well tonight.
I was surprised at the strength of a 350mg dose. Some effects are still noticeable 24 hours later. I experienced significant bits and pieces of emotional history review in a way that was not emotionally overwhelming.
If I do it again, I'd allocate at least a day for journeying and integration without any need to drive a vehicle. I'd also take Ibogaine soon after waking in order to have a chance of sleeping at the end of the day. I'd consider taking Dramamine to ward off nausea.
I wish I had my phone ready to record audio to easily capture thoughts, insights, and visions, in the dark. I kept turning on the light, which was painful and disturbed the journey.
Over many decades, I have used:
* Cubensis mushrooms roughly 13 times,
* Light doses of LSD 3 - 5 times
* Cannabis hundreds of times
* DMT 3 or 4 times
* 5 meo-DMT twice
* MDMA ~12 times
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