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The Final Nail in the Coffin
Heroin
by Damien
Citation:   Damien. "The Final Nail in the Coffin: An Experience with Heroin (exp113510)". Erowid.org. Aug 18, 2020. erowid.org/exp/113510

 
DOSE:
  IV Heroin

BODY WEIGHT: 130 lb


I had been in love with anything derived from opium since my first experience with hydrocodone three years before. (yes, I moved very fast.) I had even experienced insufflated and I had been a semi-regular user for about three to four months at that point
I had been a semi-regular user for about three to four months at that point
, but this is the story of my first time taking an intravenous injection.

Like I mentioned above, I had experience with heroin. But I didn't know how to inject myself, because I was the only person out of all of my friends who even used it, and I wasn't sure that I even WANTED to inject. However I met a guy while acting as movie extras who was not only into heroin, but a full blown IV addict. I exchanged numbers with him, as crazy as that sounds looking back on it, and started using him as a hookup because the only guy I knew up until then had been giving me poor quality product for poor prices. Now remember, this guy was an IV user, and a heavy one at that. And after being around him getting high all this time, after being around his circle of fellow junkies, after seeing people who have been dependent and tolerant for so many years get so high off of this route of administration, it fascinated me. And as crazy as this sounds (it wouldn't be an honest experience report if I lie to myself and pretend this didn't happen), I had broken up with the only girl that I have possibly ever been in love with, who had experience with IV heroin use, and wanted to...be like her. To be just as good, if not BETTER than her. I've had to work on that issue of mine.

So I finally decided to jump in and take a bite of the forbidden fruit. I had some old, clean 28 gauge insulin syringes in my house, and took them over to our regular shooting gallery hangout spot, where the night before I had agreed with my "friend" that he would do the injection for me the next day. We ended up getting some very potent heroin, it just so happened that the day I decided to try this ROA, was the day we got the best batch of product that I had ever had up until that point. It was a very dark gray, almost purple color, and I remember that the liquid inside the syringe was a thick black color.

The first attempt was mostly a failure, because it was December and we were in a camper with no heat at around 9 in the morning, so he had trouble finding a vein and even then, he missed some. However, I did feel a sudden, but gradual, opioid feeling very similar to my first experience with hydrocodone, but it was still mild. We still had some product left and decided to save it until later on in the day when it would be warmer and could more easily find a vein on me.

[Erowid Note: Driving while intoxicated, tripping, or extremely sleep deprived is dangerous and irresponsible because it endangers other people. Don't do it!]

That time came, and this time we loaded up the same amount into the syringe, except this time, my veins were bulging, and he got ALL of the shot in. I remember waiting for about 10 seconds, waiting for when it was going to hit me, nervous as a wreck because I had no idea what I was about to experience. I remember saying something along the lines of "when is this stuff going to kic...OOOOHHHaHaHa!!!" it was just a subtle twinge of a feeling in my core, but it was so pleasurable that my mental state almost felt sexual in a way, especially since my vocal reaction reminded me of a vocal reaction of an old ex I had when we were doing sexual things. From then on, I felt this liquid warmth spread out from the original spot in my core to every reach of my body, spreading out and growing in intensity more and more by the second. This rush lasted about 10 seconds, after which it faded into yet another "liquidy" warmth that I felt all over as I drove down the street (I had taken the shot in my car in the driveway of the guy's house) and I remember saying "oh my god, this is better than sex." And it was, I remember thinking that it was like 10 minutes of the best sex I had ever had crammed into about 10 seconds. After a while, the feeling faded in intensity, and I was left with a warm, fuzzy afterglow.
After a while, the feeling faded in intensity, and I was left with a warm, fuzzy afterglow.


But I named my report what I named it for a reason. Because from that point on, I had a fixation on the needle that, long story short, eventually dragged me down extremely far until I ended up a convicted felon serving a year behind bars with over $3,000 owed in restitution. But that's an entirely different story in its own right.

I've always seen heroin as the perfect drug-representation of the yin and yang, it has a very beautiful side, and also a very sinister side. Usually you can't have one without the other, some people can avoid the addiction but with someone like me with an addictive personality and a natural love for opioids, this method of using this drug is one of the worst things to have introduced into my life. That being said, I don't necessarily regret the experience. I regret some of the outcomes, but I don't regret that I was able to feel the beauty that comes along with something so addictive. The forbidden fruit tasted just as good as everyone warned me about.

[Submitted in 2019]

Exp Year: 2016ExpID: 113510
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: 22 
Published: Aug 18, 2020Views: 637
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Heroin (27) : Small Group (2-9) (17), Glowing Experiences (4), Addiction & Habituation (10), Retrospective / Summary (11), First Times (2)

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Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the individual authors who submit them.
Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid Center.


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