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All the Way Down the Rabbit Hole
Alcohol, 4-Methylmethcathinone & Ketamine
by Noir
Citation:   Noir. "All the Way Down the Rabbit Hole: An Experience with Alcohol, 4-Methylmethcathinone & Ketamine (exp113807)". Erowid.org. Apr 13, 2020. erowid.org/exp/113807

 
DOSE:
  repeated oral Alcohol
  250 mg oral 4-Methylmethcathinone
    insufflated 4-Methylmethcathinone
    repeated insufflated Ketamine
  0.5 mg oral Pharms - Alprazolam
[Erowid Note: The dose described in this report is very high, potentially beyond Erowid's 'heavy' range, and could pose serious health risks or result in unwanted, extreme effects. Sometimes extremely high doses reported are errors rather than actual doses used.]

Dosages
250mg Oral Dose 4MMC
200mg Oral Dose (S’s dose of 4MMC)
4MMC Insufflated (Repeated, by both of us)
Ketamine (Unspecified Amounts)
------------------------------------------------------

First, a little bit about myself. I’m very experienced in altered states of consciousness ranging from stimlants to psychedelics. I’ve tried Amphetamine, MDMA, LSD, 2C-B, 5-MeO-MiPT, DMT, Ketamine, DXM, Mushrooms and I’m sure there are others I can’t think of but you get the idea. I’m adventurous. Anyway, 4-MMC has become one of my favorite substances since this year actually. I like it better than MDMA because it’s more easily controllable in social situations. I also like that the comedown isn’t as rough, as long as I don’t go over 500mg in a night. It gives me that rushy feeling I enjoy. However, one of the major downsides is how damn fiendy it is. It’s always MORE MORE MORE. Just one more line! Only while I'm on it though. When I come all the way down the cravings subside.

This is an experience report about one of the craziest experiences I've ever had. The day started out simple enough. It was afternoon on Halloween. I decided I didn't want to wait until evening to have fun so I drank a 5% alcoholic beverage just to give me a chill buzz for the day. I didn't really have anything planned for that day anyway. Seemed normal enough. Then one of my friends hits me up (let's call her S). S asks if I have anything she can snort. I tell her I have some M-Cat. So she comes over at about 5pm and does a line. She had never done M-Cat before so I explained some of the effects to her. Though it didn't seem like she really cared too much as long as it got her high. I explained that it was like a combination of Cocaine and MDMA. We talk for a bit, just hanging out in my living room. She's doing lines and we're just chatting. M-Cat makes you very chatty. Also I find that it makes people apologize for being chatty.

So she's pretty high. We decide to go to the store real quick to get some more booze for me. It was weird being at the store. Well it was Halloween, but everyone was acting weirder than normal. We got some booze and then headed to the cemetery to chill. That's a thing we like to do sometimes. It was freezing but we still did it. I drank a bit and we hugged some trees. What better thing to do on Halloween than chill in a cemetery at night? My friend kept apologizing for talking a lot but I am very familiar with M-Cat's effects and drugs in general, it didn't really bother me at all. I know exactly how it goes with uppers.

Anyway we're having a pretty good time. My friend gets a call from her friend (we'll call her T). They're doing Halloween stuff. Trick or Treating and what-not and we were invited to come over. At this point I really wanted to dose myself with some M-Cat as well because seeing my friend high was making me a little jealous. I wanted to be on the same wavelength. Any excuse to do some drugs, right?

So I take an oral dose because my nose is all messed up. I do remember I took 250mg in a shot glass, I weighed it out proper. I poured some of my alcohol in the shot glass with the powder and stirred it up and drank it. Honestly it was nastttyyyy. Real nasty chemical taste. I also gave my friend an oral dose of 200mg thinking if we both did oral doses then maybe she wouldn't feel the need to keep compulsively snorting more. This stuff is hellish on the sinuses! So we did that and then I decided I wanted to dress up. It is Halloween after all. So I throw on a dress and a witch hat. I was looking pretty witchy.

Now we’re at her friend’s house. We were just chilling, the three of us. We smoked some joints and I drank more alcohol. Then the oral dose of Mephedrone started to hit me HARD. I started to feel really speedy. I was just going from one room to another, sitting down, moving around. Just feeling like I wanted to move around a lot. Then it would be a little too much and I'd have to sit down. I felt pretty euphoric as well, especially when I relaxed into it. My friend S dosed T with what she had left in the baggy. So we were all pretty much on the same page. I don't know how much was in the baggy but if I had to guess I'd say 50mg or so, just from looking at it. I remember we were all just dancing in the kitchen at one point having a fair amount of fun. The Mephedrone made me really outgoing. All my inhibitions went out the window. Normally I'm a somewhat shy and introverted person but get some 4MMC in me and I'm a beast. I could talk to random strangers like it was nobody's business
Normally I'm a somewhat shy and introverted person but get some 4MMC in me and I'm a beast. I could talk to random strangers like it was nobody's business
, which I did. Everything just seemed to flow together, socially. I didn't even feel a little awkward. We were all having fun and then S and myself decided we wanted to go back to my place, basically just so we could do more M-Cat. This was a couple hours, maybe three hours in, so we were both feeling a little fiendy. More, more, more, that's what this drug is about.

Anyway so we take off and it's just S and myself now at my place. T said she'd come by to join us later. So I lay out some lines on my coffee table for all three of us. I've been experimenting with adding 25-30mg of Ketamine at the end of M-Cat lines and I find that it really makes me feel amazing. It just gives it a slightly more psychedelic feel combined with a slightly blurrier vision. Well, I should say it gives me double vision. With a small amount of ket added on I still feel grounded from the stimulant effects of the M-Cat. It's just that double vision and euphoria really hits the spot for me. The Ket adds to the euphoria as well. So S and myself snorted a line of 100mg M-Cat with 25mg Ketamine. I know I said I didn't want to snort anything but I was so fiendy from that oral dose so fuck it. My poor nose. I turned on some rap music and we were really enjoying ourselves. Just chilling and vibing out, dancing in the kitchen. T came by and did her line. We talked about drugs for a while. S gets a call that one of her friends wants her to come to the bar and hangout. Somebody called a cab for us, thank god, because I don't think I could drive while on Ket. Stimulants, maybe, but Ket, no way. Even a small amount. I was just too uncoordinated for serious things.

The cabby picks us up. I'm chatting the cab drivers ear off about her job. I think she enjoyed the conversation though. I'm pretty sure she knew we were all fucked out of our minds. All you had to do was take one look at my pupils. They were expansive. Haha.

We arrive at the bar. Then I start peaking. My mouth is dryer than the Sahara desert so we order some drinks. I was chatting strangers ears off about fuck all. Having the time of my life. Hilarious for somebody that's normally quiet and introverted. Tonight I was a god damn social butterfly. Everyone kept complimenting my witch costume. I felt so good. My friends didn't know but I snuck into the bathroom to do another line of M-Cat while I was at the bar. This was when I was already peaking from the line I did at my place. Then I invited S to do another line in the bathroom with me also because I wanted her to have fun too. We both just snorted some straight out of the baggy. No idea exactly how much it was. Not a lot, probably about 50mg each. God damn I felt like a fucking boss though.

So 2am comes around and one of our new bar friends gave us a ride home. Blessed soul that he is. Love it when people are nice like that. It's just S and myself now. She had to work in the morning so she decides to crash at my place so we get in bed together. I have some awesome blacklights so I turn those on. It adds a nice ambiance to the room. I had been drinking a lot at the bar and all those drinks I had earlier in the day so I was actually pretty drunk. I took .5mg of a Xanax so I could come down and go to sleep. Threw on some Rick and Morty so we could watch it while we fell asleep.

Then... for some reason I think now is a great time to do more Ketamine. I guess I was just so inebriated from all the drugs that I forgot Ketamine and alcohol can be a bad combination.
I was just so inebriated from all the drugs that I forgot Ketamine and alcohol can be a bad combination.
I did a little bit and started tripping... then I did a really big fat fucking line and got into bed. I gave the remaining M-Cat to S and she got into bed with me and laid down.

This is when shit starts to get real bizarre. I was sitting in bed and the Ketamine hit me full force. It's actually hard to remember all the details from this part of the night. Mind you it was 4 or 5 in the morning. Here's what I remember...

I had double vision, then triple vision. Then it seemed as if reality made copies of itself. Except they were overlapping each other. It wasn't just my visuals that were like that. It was as if my consciousness made copies of itself. Layering over each other. Different timelines started playing out. I could see myself waving my hand in the air but I wasn't in control of my hand. I started doing weird things with my fingers and it felt like I was interpreting energy. I was just watching myself have this experience from a distance. I was really far away from my body. I knew there a person, me, on a bed, but it wasn't actually me. I wasn't inside of my body, I was just watching myself like a movie. I kept saying "Woah!' and "Holy shit!" and I'd get sucked out of my body and be really far away. Reality became absolutely completely distorted. I wasn't scared though, it seemed like that's the way it had always been. Then I got stuck in a time loop. I'd say something or move my fingers and I'd see that happen but then time would repeat. I'd see myself repeating the exact same scene over and over again like time was looping and glitching. I also had an intense feeling of Deja Vu the whole time like I knew what was going to happen. It felt like I was stuck in a time loop and I was never going to get out. In fact time had no meaning at all. Where I was on that bed was all that had ever been and all that ever would be. This 3D reality that we exist in felt like it was gone. A distorted perception of an old image of existence. I was apart from that. Then there wasn't me at all. I had complete ego death. I guess this is when I was peaking on the Ketamine, though I failed to recognize that I was even on any drugs at all. The me that I knew existed on the bed was in another dimension that I was completely disconnected from.

It's soooo hard to explain this experience with just words but I'm doing my best. Imagine you're looking in a mirror, then you smash that mirror into a bunch of fragments. So now you're looking at yourself but it's all fragmented and not all put together. Reality was overlapping and splicing over itself and repeating itself in time loops. Then my consciousness was somewhere else entirely. I wasn't seeing with my eyes anymore. I was seeing through my third eye or something. I was understanding parallel dimensions and alternate timelines. The material world seemed so 2-dimensional and far off. Like looking down a long tunnel and seeing an image on a computer screen in the distance. My perception of reality was shattered.

Eventually reality seemed to put itself back together for me again, thank fucking god. I mean really put itself back together. Everything was made up of cogs and energy. Little pieces that all fit together like a puzzle. I saw my room and it was made of energy. Like when Neo goes blind in The Matrix but still sees everything in digital code. It was almost exactly like that.

Then I was sick... so very, very sick. I fell out of bed onto the floor and told S I was dizzy. I had intense vertigo. Everything seemed to be sliding. Things were super far away or super close. The corners of the room were slanted at weird angles. My whole body was vibrating and tingling. I asked S if she could feel it when she touched my fingers and she said she did. I told her it felt like some kind of divine energy was flowing through my entire body. To my surprise I didn't actually puke. Slowly but surely I came down from whatever the fuck just happened. Then I had crazy visions when I closed my eyes. I was seeing alien landscapes. Various geometrical shapes were flying around and shifting in my inner vision. Then I saw a blue sky and white clouds. I broke down and started crying my eyes out. I was so fucking happy to be alive and back on Earth inside my human body again. I felt such immense gratitude for being alive and no longer trapped in any time loops. Everything started to make sense again. I just kept saying "Oh my god, what was that?", "What just happened?", "What the fuck!", "Where was I just now?". Like my human brain was trying to catch up with the experience I just had. I was so emotional. S just held me in her arms while I cried. Seeing that blue sky was so beautiful. It was like everything else had been so alien and here was this beautiful part of reality that actually made sense.

Well that's my trip report. I absolutely would NOT recommend mixing Xanax, Alcohol, and Ketamine in combination with each other. I feel like that's just not a good idea. This was one of the most intense experiences of my entire life. I consider myself an experienced tripper having done lots of LSD, Mushrooms, 2C-B, 4-Aco-Dmt, DMT, and other analogs. This experience with Ketamine was beyond comprehension. Words can not properly convey the experience. It was ego death, then rebirth. I do feel that Ketamine is a spiritual drug. I don't think I'll ever look at life the same way again after that Halloween night. I'm glad to be alive. This world isn't perfect but god damnit I'm happy to be here. In all the realms and dimensions of existence, this one’s not too shabby. I'm also thankful to have a friend like S who sat with me through the whole thing and made sure I was physically safe.

Exp Year: 2019ExpID: 113807
Gender: Female 
Age at time of experience: 28
Published: Apr 13, 2020Views: 1,369
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4-Methylmethcathinone (458), Ketamine (31), Alcohol (61) : Combinations (3), Various (28)

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