Citation: Trulie Humbled. "Lost in a Sea of Ten Thousand Puppets: An Experience with 1P-LSD, MDMA & 4-AcO-DMT (exp114787)". Erowid.org. Oct 13, 2020. erowid.org/exp/114787
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A quick background, at this time in my life I had acquired plenty of experience with LSD, Psilocybin, and MDMA. I had combined LSD with MDMA, as well as Mushrooms with MDMA. Never before however have I combined two psychedelics, and I had very little experience with the "research chemical" counterparts, 1p-LSD and 4-AcO-DMT (psilocetin). I had saved up for tickets to my first music festival with a friend, and planned to attempt what I know to be called a Jedi Flip.
Day one of the festival passes smoothly, with moderate cannabis usage. Day two is when I decide to push my psychedelic expertise beyond what I ever had before. Why I decided to take the aforementioned doses is beyond me. Psychedelics, they have a certain way of humbling people. Especially those who get cocky with them... Skip to 10:20 if you are only interested in the effects of the combination of all substances mentioned. However I advise you read the rest, as it may dissuade you from following in my footsteps.
6:00 P.M. I remove the bag containing the reliably sourced 1p, and take two 100 microgram blotters. Roller coaster has left the station, time to kick back and wait. Can't exactly relax, as the only music playing is dubstep, but I plan to let nothing stop me from enjoying myself.
6:30 P.M. First mental effects begin to emerge, producing a quiet headspace and a very familiar body load, almost as if my bones were becoming denser. I was with some friends in hammocks, some that came with me and others that we met. I experienced no intimidation by the massive crowd. My previous experience at EDM shows had given me the impression that the turnout was probably 99% friendly people, and I did begin to relax there in the hammock.
7:00 P.M. Visual distortions started becoming very apparent at this time. The stage lights and effects were very bright, and quite mesmerizing. Trees in the distance began to wave in ways that wind alone could never produce. All the people in the crowd in front of me looked so funny, each one wearing a particularly interesting outfit. A new performer was coming on, and I decided I would take my MDMA pill and join the crowd. The pill had been tested, both personally and by a reagent, and I felt comfortable with the effects the 1p was producing. It seemed like a good idea. Oh boy.
7:20 P.M. Over the last twenty minutes I slowly became more and more mesmerized by the sheer magnitude of the stage in front of me. The closer I got the more the bass rattled through my existence, and the more entrancing the lights became. I started losing touch with everything around me and was only focused on the music, and dancing.
Before very long I had gotten tired of dancing and wanted to sit. That was a problem, though, because everyone was aggressively dancing around me. "Why is everyone dancing? Oh yes, the music" I thought. I felt very silly just standing there while everyone is dancing, so I began dancing again. It was fun to express myself anyway. The 1p-LSD had only intensified up until this point, and it was fairly easy to get lost in the music and enjoy the energetic light show. The mental effects were very pronounced as well, I was losing touch more and more with my ego and began questioning a lot as to how an event of this proportion could possibly exist. How so many people could gather for one purpose..
7:45 P.M. Due to my previous experience with psychedelics my experience up until this point was manageable. I would get constant "reality checks" when my mind played tricks on me, but could make sense of the situation. Then the MDMA hit me. 200ug of LSD (or a molecular counterpart) is a reasonably strong dose, even for those who are experienced. The same can be said about MDMA. I would never recommend taking high or even moderate doses if you are going to combine psychoactive substances. The M Pill hit me like a freight train. I suddenly got very dizzy, thirsty, and nauseous. My body was heavy and it got hard to think, and to reason. I had quickly gone through my camelback full of water while dancing, and was able to get one last sip. "I need more water." I turn around, and realized that not only had it gotten dark, but I was toward the very front of the crowd, which was much denser than it was when I had been walking forward. Everyone was looking at the stage, moving as if they were in a trance. I was forgetting more and more why I or anyone else was there, and I started exploring much deeper meanings than simply to dance. The DJ is playing very heavy music and people are headbanging left and right. I convinced myself that he was trying to throw a party so hard that everyone died of exhaustion. Water. Oh yeah.
~8:00 P.M. The walk back through the crowd to the water station was a nightmare. I became more and more uncomfortable of my situation, more and more critical of myself, and subsequently more aware of how much more fun everyone else was having. I didn't want to make anyone worry about me, and felt very self aware of the fact that I was pretending to have fun for everyone else's sake. The visual distortions were miraculous, but far more disorienting than I expected. I was instinctually checking on my possessions like my phone and wallet, but found myself unable to fathom why I had any of them. I was fumbling them through the crowd, even dropped my wallet at one point. A kind stranger let me know, and I very awkwardly took it from him and left, as I did not want him to know I was tripping. I did not want anyone to know. I had taken illegal substances and if anyone knew I could be put in jail. Or so my altered state lead me to believe. After getting water I knew I wanted to find my friends so they could ease my mind, but when I returned to the hammocks (after what felt like an eternity), they were nowhere to be found. This sent me into a very panicked state, and I frantically tried to find the exit to the festival grounds back to my campsite. This took what felt like another eternity that included a porta-potty stop where I got visions of EMTs pulling my body out after the festival was over. I didn't want to overdose in such a dishonorable place, and decided if I would die then I would at least do it where I could be found by my friends, and made it my life's mission (literally lol) to make it to the tent. It seems I had forgotten that my dosage, while very strong, was nowhere near enough the amount it would take to kill someone. I walked through the campground, without a flashlight or a single clue of where my campsite was within the sea of tents, until I finally stumbled upon it.
~9:30 P.M. The immense amount of fear that had previously filled my thoughts was almost instantly washed over by an equally immense amount of relief. I was alive. And I don't think I have ever been more grateful in my entire life. I had checked my pockets and managed to lose my phone, wallet, and vape somewhere in the crowd. Yet somehow they all seemed so insignificant considering I managed to keep the one thing I feared I would lose. After sitting under the canopy gaining my mental bearings for a while, I considered completing my goal of taking the psilocetin during the same night. This, rightfully, scared me, and I decided I would take another 15-20 minutes to get comfortable. My fear of death had not come back, and I inevitably decided to take it and walk back to the festival to find my friends.
~10:20 P.M. The psilocetin began to make itself known to me very quickly, the first effects arising after only 20 minutes. The effects were not overwhelming, however. Taking the 1p roughly 4 hours prior allowed me to become comfortable in the psychedelic headspace, and with the occasional gaps in my understanding of reality. I no longer questioned why I was there, I simply was. I could do as I please. I could even sit if I wanted to, and I didn't care if it harshed someone else's groove. My anxiety was gone, and I could focus on the effects of the substances.
The interaction between psychedelics was not quite as I imagined. I expected an entirely new headspace and visual profile, and in a sense it most certainly was. More specifically though, it was a steady flow between the effects of the LSD and psilocetin. I noticed this very prevalently when I walked past a mesh net that was forming itself into very sharp angled geometric patterns that caught my eye. After staring at it for maybe 10 seconds, the visual profile would shift. The lines produced by the net were no longer sharp, they were quite wavy and tangled, and appeared to start growing eyes around my peripheral vision. This was incredibly fascinating to me, but I proceeded onwards to find my friends.
10:30 P.M. My friends were still nowhere to be found at the hammocks, and in fact, some stranger had taken residence in mine. I asked him if he could share it, and he thanked me for letting him use it and happily obliged. He offered me a bump of cocaine, and I stupidly accepted, without testing it. Coke was never really my thing, but I saw no harm in a single bump. (The year following I have gone through more cocaine than I thought I would in my entire life. I know this is unrelated to the report, but I believe this decision broke an important barrier for me. I can't say cocaine has ruined my life, and I am, to this day, successfully avoiding it. But it made a financially difficult year even more stressful due to the addictive nature.) Anyhow, some time passes as we discuss our favorite artists at the festival, and I decided to join the crowd again for the performer I was most excited to see. While in the darkened crowd of nearly ten thousand people, I randomly bumped into my friend, who apparently had been looking for me for some time. It seemed almost impossible we just bumped into each other, but it seemed to put both our minds even further at ease. That and the dab pen he had.
??? P.M. Without a phone and not having memorized the set times, I lost all track of time at this point in my trip, and I was fine with that. I found it pointless to even try to guess, as the only important time would be when the music stops. I went to a merchandise booth and tried to buy a bandana. I was having a hard time justifying the price, until the attendant at the shop shined a laser on the bandana and left very long lasting tracers. She told me that it was made of a special kind of material, and for only another ten dollars I could get a laser pointer too. I very happily obliged after, giving no care to whether or not it was a good decision.
On the way out of the booth I had a revelation, a sudden feeling of understanding. I came to the conclusion that while every person is different, the essence of our consciousness is the same throughout us all. We are simply one unit, working together to help itself. I had the feeling that everything happens for a reason, and everything has a purpose. It was a miraculous feeling beyond words.
Back at the campsite everyone was very silent. Many people in my group had taken psychedelics that day and were still reveling from the journey they had just been through. This experience profoundly humbled me, and gave me a lot of respect for psychedelics. I do not advise the overuse or abuse of these compounds. They can be incredible healing tools, but then can also actually harm the psyche if used improperly. Subsequent trips have since persuaded me to steer away from psychedelics. I believe that I personally have gotten all the benefit I can get from them, at least for this time in my life. Stay safe, Stay within your limits, and test your drugs.
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