DOSE: T+ 0:00	120 ug	oral	LSD	(blotter / tab)
T+ 2:00	120 ug	oral	LSD	(blotter / tab)

BODY WEIGHT:

150 lb

The day of my 18th birthday, a close friend of mine named Danny, called and asked what my plans were later that night. I told him probably me playing video games. He then told me he had a ziplock bag of LSD, specifically containing ten 120 UG tabs. I was caught off guard but also in ridiculous belief that he could actually be serious. I’ve never done any psychedelics. I was nervous but decided “fuck it.”

That night we met at a nearby fast food with our skateboards and our curiosity. We both took one tab at 10:00pm, we joked around for a bit and proceeded to skate to a gas station by a high school where Danny asked some random guy to buy us a pack of marlboro reds, I called him gross and we laughed but I had no idea a pack of cigarettes would later come into play in our trip. Around this time it was 10:50pm, we were sitting on a curb where we had the genius idea of calling our friend Anthony to join us on our trip. 50 minutes had gone by but I felt absolutely no effects or visuals. Somehow Anthony managed to get his mom to drop him off where we were, we talked with his mom a bit and then she left. Us being teenagers we were absolutely dying in laughter of the whole fucked up, last minute situation. We gave Anthony a tab and proceeded to walk towards the high-school, also we had no plan for the night.

Now the time is 11:45pm this is where I noticed I was different, my vision was kind of brighter and I also felt more happy than usual and I was just feeling a sensation of gratefulness to the sky and spending time with some friends late at night. We walked behind the school and found ourselves sitting on a fence, talking and looking around. This is when my trip started but I did not realize until later during the moment. Out of nowhere we all started saying the dumbest shit and started to laugh so much, the feeling was like never before, I felt calm, happy but also on edge since it was dark and we were outside. The only thing that was hurting was my stomach from laughing so much, still I was not getting visuals at all, just my mind was moving fast with random thoughts and my emotions were happy constantly. We then got up and ran onto the football field laughing and knocking down various hurdles and football equipment that was surrounding the field.

At this point I lost track of time and the three of us decided to run in a circle in the middle of the football field to create a “vortex” leading us to the visuals since we all talked about not having any visuals. We proceeded to run and after 5 minutes of just straight running and staring at each other, I became so dizzy and we all jumped into the “vortex.” I remember laughing and all of us rolling on the floor but we all quiet down and noticed everything changed. I remember sitting on the field and looking up at the stars, they were distorted but in a beautiful way, they kept twinkling and rotating in red and blue glimmers, also the sky was like a dark canvas and the stars were painted on. My mind was receiving so much at once but I was able to think about it and accept it without even knowing.

My trip then confused and scared me. While I was busy looking up, I wasn’t paying attention around me and Danny ran up on the right side of me while I was sitting and I thought it was a random homeless person and not only did I think that, Anthony was also on the left side of me and saw the same fear I had saw, I stood quiet and watched Danny and then he revealed who he was by pulling out the pack of Marlboro reds. Me and Anthony were so relieved it was him, I remember feeling the rush of relief in the air and I breathed in safety. It’s crazy when I was tripping because I didn’t even realize I was tripping still, my mind really made me believe this was reality. Right after that, somehow we had a great idea of taking another tab, which we did and that’s what truly started the night.

I was tripping so hard I lost some memory of the night but where I do remember is Danny chasing us with a pack of cigarettes! Me and Anthony were screaming and laughing at the thought of him wanting us to smoke a cigarette with him, we called him gross, homeless but it was all in good fun, never in the night was anyone mad or sad. This became the running gag of our trip, me and Anthony running and negotiating with Danny about his “cancer sticks” and screaming laughing about it. (Also I’m surprised the cops weren’t called, we were extremely out of our minds screaming.)

The funniest part of the trip was when Anthony was laying on my leg, I was sitting up, and Danny was standing above us smoking. We talked about the craziest things but they all made sense! I mentioned how if acid is just a room, like scientists invented and created a room so small, you can only enter this room by placing it on your tongue and the tab was the room. We talked about our deepest desires in life and explored different conversations together about the world and growing up. I’ve never felt such a greater bonding experience, also we weren’t speaking full sentences and mostly rambled random words but we understood each other completely fine and had normal but deep philosophical conversations, it was like we made our own language up. All while this was happening, Danny looked at both me and Anthony on the floor and pointed at our hands while laughing. I looked at Anthony’s hand at first and screamed! He had a cigarette lit and was smoking! He then screamed at me and pointed at my hand! I was also smoking!!! We started to cry and laugh and scream all at once in a three man group, it was the funniest thing that happened that night, we became the one thing we were running from!

A while after this, this is when the “bad” part of the trip came into play, while I started to peak I wondered off from Danny and Anthony, I went down to the 30 yard line while they stayed at the center of the field. I remember staring at the stars and thanking God for such a beautiful experience, the only light source we had was the moonlight, we could only see that and the field, everything around us was pitch black but it was so beautiful and peaceful. Up until Anthony yelled at me and Danny. I looked back and noticed Danny also had wondered off towards the sideline and as we both looked towards Anthony alone at the center, he whispered to us, “The Devil.” I can’t make this up, somehow I had super hearing and I heard this man whisper “The Devil” to me. Immediately as he said this, the moon turned off and it was complete total darkness, I felt the greatest fear of my life, the anxiety consumed me and I immediately ran through the darkness to find my friends, they also were experiencing the same thing cause we all kept yelling each other’s names to find each other, we then huddled together and called Anthony an idiot and told him never do that again.

He apologized and we quickly started preaching out to Jesus to rid of this darkness and evil that was around us, we kept shouting “Jesus!” Then the moon came back! We started to laugh hysterically once again and kept joking about how we almost lost our lives. I remember feeling anxious but calm after that. Time went by so fast, it was already sunrise, our phones were dead and we decided to skate all the way to Anthony’s uncle's house. We got there and I remember constantly thinking I had to use the bathroom, it was absolutely annoying, I realized we were coming down and I felt so drained, my body hurt from laughing, my mind wanted sleep, my thoughts were then focused on school that day, I forgot that we dropped on a school night and we had to go. We all went to different schools and had Anthony’s aunt drop us off, I was the last one to be dropped off but as soon as I got out of the car, I ran home, did not stop once. As soon as I got home, I laid in my bed, thinking I was okay but I still felt like I was tripping still and it panicked me, I drank water, used the bathroom, tried watching a movie but I couldn’t help but notice I was sad, I remember crying and not knowing why. I laid in bed depressed all day, I’ve never felt total loss and sadness and despair all at once, I wanted to die but didn’t have the motivation to get up.

Doing LSD that night made me realize a lot of things about myself, one thing specifically, I was in a relationship at that time and I wasn’t happy with it, I tried ignoring that I wasn’t happy in my relationship with this girl, I put on a fake smile everyday thinking I was happy with her and isolated the fear of losing her and that inevitable “heartbreak.” We were still in high-school and I knew it wasn’t gonna last forever although I tried to not think about, LSD made me into this better version of myself and then quickly opened my eyes and forced me to pay attention and dwell into those feelings I neglected. For example, I locked the sadness of that relationship in a room and LSD threw my ass into that room and locked me in there for hours. I was completely broken.

A month later the girl broke up with me and it made me realize more of my trip. That’s the beauty of psychedelics, even after your trip, you realize the meaning and lessons that come with it later on in life, and thankfully I received that later on. Even as I type this, I’m happy to say I’d redo that whole night again, I had a beautiful bonding experience with my close friends, I experienced the most loneliest feeling in the world but I came back knowing more about myself and the way life works, it shaped me for more the good rather the worst.

Exp Year: 2020	ExpID: 114814
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 18
Published: May 21, 2023	Views: 376
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LSD (2) : General (1), First Times (2), Difficult Experiences (5), Glowing Experiences (4), Relationships (44), Therapeutic Intent or Outcome (49), Small Group (2-9) (17)