Citation: TiHKALmonster. "A *Pr*operly Mextifying View of Reality: An Experience with MXPr (exp115640)". Erowid.org. Aug 10, 2021. erowid.org/exp/115640
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How might an oak see the world? How might a ladybug? If you could consolidate the mycelial net of a mile-wide fungal colony and put it in a two-legged body, how might its perceptions differ from yours? Imagine if it had access to the knowledge, the understanding that you’ve gathered through your years on Earth, but viewed it all through the lens of a creature so far out of our sphere of understanding that it might as well be an extraterrestrial being. How would it think?
A few months ago I received a gift from a friend: a small baggie labeled MXPr, filled with white fluffy powder. A big fan of the dissociative headspace but new to MXE-alogs, I was eager to give it a try. I tested it at 10 mg, then 20, then ~60, but these titrations only affirmed my pressing need to see where this journey could lead. My preliminary findings showed that it induced a markedly clear headspace, more on the stimulating side for a dissociative, and very warm – more so than ketamine. With no plans for the weekend and the house to myself, I decided to push the envelope and aim for the stars.
Mindset: Eager, relaxed, clearheaded from a day of complete sobriety, but slightly tired from lack of sleep the night before.
Setting: My home, in the basement mostly, with psychedelic youtube videos on queue as well as several potential TV shows loaded up on Netflix. A superb soundsystem and music playing consistently throughout the experience.
0:00 I began with taking a 40 mg line. It’s funny – this compound seems very front-heavy. The first 10 minutes of a dose feels not unlike 3-MeO-PCP or o-PCE, with a dulling surge of dissociative energy and fuzzing of thought. After it calms down however, it becomes remarkably clear-headed and comforting, although dissociation is still obviously evident when complex tasks or speaking become involved.
Now to those thinking of trying this compound, 40 mg is a high dose to start with. I was confident from my lower tests that I could handle this intensity and that it felt no more harsh, neurotoxic, or physiologically harmful than other dissociatives I have pushed the boundaries of, but definitely proceed with caution, as you always should.
After the first 40 mg kicked in, I noticed that my mind had begun to slip into an unfamiliar state – one that I couldn’t fully characterize. After enjoying some tranquil acoustic guitar by Michael Hedges for an hour and a half, I decided to take another line.
1:15 Another 40 mg, down (up?) the hatch.
By the time the second one hit I was further down the spiral, but still couldn’t fully characterize it except for “dissociative weirdness”. It seemed very warm and comforting, and had an oddly supportive and motivating feel. Almost like this drug was giving me a pep-talk. I almost felt like going for a run or writing a book. Instead I took another line.
1:48 After washing my nose out well with saline, another 40 mg of powdered inspiration was hoovered into oblivion.
~2:00 Suddenly BOOM. It was as if I had teleported. There was no rushing noise, no DMT-esque tunnel, only a sleepy confusion at having been instantly brought into a new state of mind. Looking around me the familiar sights were still there. If I tried hard enough I could understand that the object I was looking at was a curtain, or a door, or a foot. But there was no familiar ring to any of these sights. A curtain hanging against a window made no more or less sense than had it been an acorn squash. The concept of -bed- was utterly foreign to me, as well as why I was laying prone on it. I lowered my feet to the ground and began to walk. Surprisingly, I had very little trouble ambulating around the house, looking with interest at a nail in a bookcase, my cat eating his own vomit, and other similarly abstract concepts. In fact, it was not that I had lost meaning in the world, but meaning had become so utterly irreconcilable with this material world I was living in that I was needing to translate between the two languages just to interact with it in some basic way.
The clear-headedness cannot be overemphasized. I was astonishingly deep in my own world, yet I had the presence of mind to close the basement door which was cracked, and even texted a friend of mine about the experience, although I later read it and noticed some weird sentence structure. Somehow I even managed to weigh out and rack up one final line, 30 mg, and log it in my drug usage app (I use Tabs) before inhaling it, all with only marginal understanding of cause and effect. [According to tabs this was at 2:22].
With difficulty I managed to recall that pressing the large button on my row of keys would make the glowing TV move and make good sounds, so I did so and spent an unmeasured eon of time letting Youtube autoplay take me on a journey. In fact, the experience lasted about as long as my computer did, as it died right around the time I regained presence of mind enough to notice my hunger and tiredness (it was very late night at this point).
~6:30 I took a small dose of bromazolam to help sleep find me and slowly drift into oblivion to the dulcet sounds of Emancipator. The next morning there was no hangover, but a distinct lack of hydration which I chalked up to not knowing I had a mouth the night before. A bit of a fuzzy head persisted throughout the day, but I was otherwise equanimous and functional. Overall a stunningly bizarre and engaging experience, but one I don’t think I will often repeat, for my brain’s sake.
As objects radiate their hue
In orange and pink embrace,
My mind is overjoyed to feel
So wonderous a place.
So if morning mists be lit like fire,
And reality recedes,
Just know I’ve sought you out again,
Sweet child of MXE
Warning, and musings:
Looking back on the experience, MXPr definitely has some serotonin activity. The warm, soft edges of mind-structures and the distinctive synesthetic pink/orange hue to the experience is something I have only ever experienced, but yet always experience, with empathogens. This has held true from 4-FA to Moxy, and 6-APB to DXM. In light of this, I would be very cautious doing this high of a dose if you are taking any MAOI or serotonin-modulating compound. Serotonin syndrome is no joke, but even more dangerous if you are as impaired and unaware as I was throughout this experience. I am glad for the experience and had a phenomenal time, but I would feel terrible if someone decided to take 150 mg of this stuff and ended up being hurt. Safe research and knowing your boundaries is the first rule of using novel compounds (number two being *use a scale!!*).
I narrowly missed the "good old days" of MXE, and was excited to be introduced to its cousins. MXPr and MXiPr both seem very similar to me, and fit the description almost precisely to how reports of MXE go. Having not tried HXE or DMXE, the other two analogs on the market as of 2020, this holds tight competition for my favorite dissociative of all time.
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