DOSE: T+ 0:00	200 mg	oral	Harmala Alkaloids
T+ 0:38	250 mg	oral	DMT	(freebase)

BODY WEIGHT:

80 kg

18:30: I ingest 200mg of a 50/50 harmine and harmaline isolate

19:08: I ingest 250mg of self-extracted impurified DMT freebase

20:00: I log off my computer to start reading “the way of the psychonaut”

20:30: the lines on the wooden floor seem as if wanting to move

20:36: their texture turn from a low-definition 720p to a crisp 4k visual resolution and my processing of the text start to change

Instead of moving from one word to the next, my eyes zoom out and holds the entire page of the book in awareness. As I read the black letters start to flash on the surface of white paper until the entire column of text pushes itself of the page to hover in wavy suspension a few centimetres above it.

20:46: I reckon I may be losing my ability to extract conceptual information from the book and get up to notice the entire room has come alive in the most unusual ways. The physical objects in the space of my apartment stand out before me in crystal clarity and motion takes on an almost liquid feeling.

I walk to the corridor, where the light from the single source of illumination below my bed cuts off at the turn of the doorframe, revealing a box-like transition to a darkened space, almost tangible enough to touch, as thousands of red, yellow, and green laser beams shoot from wall to wall and floor to ceiling to form a fixed and unchanging grid of colour.

I walk to my bed, plop down and put on a soft light-blocking eye-mask, behind which I meet no darkness, as my entire visual field is flooded with activity.

I look out through what appears to be the round porthole window on the side of a boat and into a world inhabited by thousands of small sentient lifeforms, darting back and forth in a maze-like structure, examining every conceivable crevice available to them, as if propelled by a child-like sense of wonder and curiosity. They detect my presence and my view transforms into a spherical pattern of red droplets revolving around a central point of gravity, as if a balloon of red liquid exploded mid-air within a wind tunnel shooting air towards it from every conceivable angle, suspending the crimson droplets in a constant gyrating motion within the central field of the aerial blast.

The vision spins out into several others, with rapidly shifting patterns moving in a continuous flow from the presence of the benevolent emotional intelligence encountered, excitedly reaching a technological artifact towards me in a fast and fleeing pace, exuding an innocent and childlike intentionality.

21:01: after countless transformational sequences, the deep profundity of the visual stream ends abruptly, signifying a stark comparison to the state from which I was just delivered into a mental state much closer to everyday consciousness.

Elaboration
These descriptions mark out memorable aspects of the trip and though several others were to follow, I take peace in this translation of subjective experience into sharable information to rest as the experience pushed me beyond my sleeping schedule, making me feel somewhat hungover and headachy on this following day.

Some of the other psychological phenomena that took place during the experience, was the act of examining the emotional states and various dispositional qualities within the symphonic complex of selves that make up the structure of what I understand as personality.

The observation, interpretation and evaluation of the aroused selves, seemed to happen from the perspective of one to the other and at times from the neutrality of an onlooking bystander.

The overall intent behind this spontaneous exercise, was to identify, understand and integrate every one of these interiors into a cohesive whole, as to enable harmony among the internal structures that shape me.

Every time I met something new, there was a resistance to it, but when I orientated myself towards examining and understanding these sentient embodiments, the tensions dissolved to form a new perspective, which took me close enough to further examine them.

Some of these selves were frighteningly insistent on causing pain and torment, some were hiding, scared and hurt, and some were detached and uncaring to one another.

One took the shape of 2 year old child, humorously oblivious to the existence of anything other than itself, as it walked, crawled and pushed play blocks off a tiny table.

It was an impressive ride that did not grant any significant therapeutic outcome that I am aware of.

But it did match an empirical entry-point to an exploratory framework that I can continue to expand upon, as I work with the multidimensional self within the psychonautic space.

And there is plenty of work to do, trust me, the internal wreck that is me has been needing some kind of resolution for years now. Overall an extremely interesting experience, that I will bump up from 250mg to 300mg on the next occasion and find a way to extend the duration, so I can stay in the realm for longer and uncover more of everything that I need to discover to heal and grow as a human being.

I was able to sleep at 23:30, 5 hours after pre-dosing the harmala concentrate, 4 hours and 30 minutes after dosing the DMT.

Final notes
The phenomena of an entity attempting to pass on some kind of technology is a common experiential narrative in the realm of DMT experience.

My encounter with the small sentient life-forms and their child-like energy appears somewhat similar to the interpretation of certain entities, such as “machine elves”.

The purity of my DMT remains unknown

Exp Year: 2022	ExpID: 116246
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 33
Published: Mar 30, 2022	Views: 548
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DMT (18), Harmala Alkaloids (76), Pharmahuasca (822) : Entities / Beings (37), Combinations (3), Alone (16)