Is it important to you that the world have accurate information about drugs?
Please donate to support Erowid Center's vision!
Ripped Apart
Salvia divinorum, Cocaine & Alcohol
Citation:   tawam. "Ripped Apart: An Experience with Salvia divinorum, Cocaine & Alcohol (exp116729)". Erowid.org. Oct 29, 2022. erowid.org/exp/116729

 
DOSE:
6 glasses oral Alcohol - Beer/Wine  
  3 lines insufflated Cocaine  
  1 hit smoked Salvia divinorum (extract)
BODY WEIGHT: 125 lb
I was visiting a friend up when he was in college.

Let's call him L. He was in a frat at the college so we go to the frat house and drink three or so beers over an hour. Another friend who joined us on the trip, A., offers me some cocaine. I do a few lines in the bathroom with him and we go back to everyone else and drink some more beers.

After about an hour after my last line of cocaine, L. says we should go visit some of his other fraternity brothers at their apartment which was a short walk away from the frat house. These other friends (S. and R.) apparently enjoyed drugs and the such, which made them looked down upon by the other frat brothers. We walk over and at this point I'm feeling pretty good after 6 or so beers and a few lines of cocaine. I had never done cocaine at this point in my life so I was definitely enjoying my first experience with it.

We get to S. and R's place and they are hanging out low key, smoking some weed. We aren't there very long when S. offers me some Salvia. I had never done salvia at this point, but I had a few friends who had tried it before in my presence. They didn’t do much other than laugh and giggle, maybe talked gibberish for a bit and then came out of it. I didn’t think very much of Salvia, it was legal to purchase at smoke shops and the such, and I thought to myself it couldn’t be too crazy if it was legal and purchasable over the counter. Big mistake.

So S. starts packing a gravity bong with what I believe was 60x concentration Salvia. He lights the Salvia and motions me to hit it. I go to hit the gravity bong and quite a bit of smoke is pushed into my lungs as is customary using gravity bongs.

I start coughing quite a bit, and I look up at all my friends around me, they start moving in slow motion, and I’m pretty amused by this. Suddenly they stop moving all together and then everything becomes pixellated and crumbles away.

I am now at a complete loss as to who I am, what I am, where I am, why I am. I have no recollection of how I have gotten here. I am being ripped apart and reformed in every second. I am in complete sensory overload, I can’t really comprehend what I am seeing or feeling. My consciousness is adrift and cannot find any reference points to anchor itself.
My consciousness is adrift and cannot find any reference points to anchor itself.
It felt like I was rolling down a hill but I could not stop myself, I am completely terrified and struggle to make sense of what is happening to me. I am colors, I am shapes, I am patterns, I am reformed and destroyed in every second. Time does not exist for me anymore, this is everything that I have ever known or will know.

I have a vague recollection of having done something previously, that brought me to this point, but I cannot remember myself or any details of my life. I presume that I have died. As I continue to be ripped apart and reconstituted innumerable times, I am suddenly catapulted forward at immense speeds. Think like hyperspace in Star Wars or something of that nature. I am now bombarded with images and visions that I cannot remember or understand.

Suddenly I come to a complete stop. An incredibly bright light is shining towards me, three giant beings of light are standing there watching me. Behind them is everyone I have ever known, or will know. My friends, family, lovers, co-workers all staring at me. I am under the assumption that I have died and am passing on to the next plane of existence. I am no longer afraid, but joyous – dare I say ecstatic. The three light beings do not speak to me, but I understand that I have escaped this world and have ascended to a higher level of being and existence.

Just like that I come to and I am sitting on the couch in S. and R’s living room. I am screaming: “WHAT THE FUCK! WHAT THE FUCK! WHAT THE FUCK!” at the top of my lungs. I have pissed myself from fear. Everyone is trying to calm me down, and after a few seconds I come back down to Earth, and am calmed but mentally shaken. My mind is blown, I had never done any drugs of this magnitude before, nor experienced anything like this.

My friends said that after hitting the gravity bong I just sat down and slumped into the couch. I had my eyes open the entire time and was just saying “what the fuck” over and over again, until I started screaming it at the top of my lungs. We all laugh about it and start making our way to L’s dorm room. We smoke a little weed and then head off to bed.

I still think of that trip from time to time [it happened 10 years ago], it is still the most powerful and terrifying experience I have ever had, and at this point I have tried many different psychedelics and substances. None come close to the intensity of this experience with Salvia.

An interesting side effect for a few months after this event, was that sometimes when I was hanging out with friends and smoking weed, I’d sometimes get this strange feeling
when I was hanging out with friends and smoking weed, I’d sometimes get this strange feeling
and look up at something and it would almost feel like I was getting pulled back into the strange world I found myself being torn apart and reformed in. Each time I would get this immense feeling of dread and my vision would get distorted, I would see repetitive patterns like I did while tripping, and it would feel as if I had never stopped tripping and the last few months were merely a continuation of the Salvia trip. This probably occurred for at least 8 months to a year before it ceased.

I tried Salvia a few times after this trip, but I never had an experience like this one ever again. I did not experience the strange “ego death” I had experienced from my first trip. An interesting aspect of this trip for me was the complete lack of time, it felt like an eternity to me, and I never experienced this again after using Salvia. After a few other trips, I ceased using Salvia and swore to never use it again.

Exp Year: 2012ExpID: 116729
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: 21
Published: Oct 29, 2022Views: 442
[ View PDF (to print) ] [ View LaTeX (for geeks) ] [ Swap Dark/Light ]
Alcohol (61), Cocaine (13), Salvia divinorum (44) : Small Group (2-9) (17), HPPD / Lasting Visuals (40), Entities / Beings (37), Combinations (3), First Times (2)

COPYRIGHTS: All reports copyright Erowid.
No AI Training use allowed without written permission.
TERMS OF USE: By accessing this page, you agree not to download, analyze, distill, reuse, digest, or feed into any AI-type system the report data without first contacting Erowid Center and receiving written permission.

Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the authors who submit them. Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid Center.


Experience Vaults Index Full List of Substances Search Submit Report User Settings About Main Psychoactive Vaults