Citation: Mistori . "'Infini-Me' a Story of Self-Discovery via Boofing: An Experience with 4-AcO-DMT, Kratom & Cannabis (exp117014)". Erowid.org. Feb 24, 2023. erowid.org/exp/117014
20mg 4-AcO-DMT boofed + Cannabis + 3g Red Borneo Kratom
“Infini-me” A self discovery story and first time experience boofing.Routes of administration (respective to title): Rectally, smoked, orally.
Prior experience: Mushrooms, LSD-25, 1p-LSD, 4-HO-MET, 4-AcO-DMT, N,N-DMT, Salvia, DXM, 25i-NBOME, Nitrous Oxide... list goes on but this is the major extent of my experience with mind-altering compounds.
Warning: as the header might imply, this trip report is mildly NSFW! If you would rather skip those details, look for the (SFW) header! This is also a very lengthy, long read.
January 7th 2023. I will never forget this day in time. The day I tried for the first time ever, boofing a mind-altering substance. A well-loved topic of many jokes amongst us communities of psychonauts, but to those open to it, it is often regarded as truly pleasurable and enlightening. Words hardly can encapsulate my enjoyment of this experience and evening. To discover so much new about myself, to probe deep inside myself to dose and peer into my own psyche even deeper as a result. It was beautiful.
My substance of choice this evening was 4-AcO DMT. This fantastic stuff has a special place in my heart.
My substance of choice this evening was 4-AcO DMT. This fantastic stuff has a special place in my heart.
I jokingly refer to it as “Clock Powder”, for sake of reference down the line. It's a silly moniker I coined for it after my 2nd trip with it. It’s often described as a substitute for Psilocybin, and it is also very commonly used as such. However, in my opinion as someone who has taken quite a decent bit of this stuff orally, intranasally and now rectally, I think it holds a different kind of torch than good ol psilocybin/psilocin. It is just as enlightening, and in experience, it IS similar - but with its own, slightly differing aspects, nuances and flavors. I would describe it as prominently visual, with a grand, intensely empathetic yet less mentally inebriating headspace. By that, I do not mean it is less intoxicating of the mind or your senses; but rather I find it has more focus. Focus on my trains of thought. My intentions, and my inner desires. It also commonly induces split streams of thought and ego. In just about every one of my experiences with it, I had spoken to a split, intelligent fragment of my own self/ego for at least a small period of time in an intellectual conversation. It once helped guide me out of quite the dark space in my life and in this experience it helped me discover lots about myself. With the preface of this experience out of the way, let’s dive into it!
Our story begins at 6:00pm on Saturday, the 7th. Enter me being a busy bee, on the clock working. Today I had been planning a trip for a matter of days. It had been a decent bit of time since I had a decently strong experience, and I was craving the novelty of an altered state of perception this night. Up until shortly after 6, I was planning to consume a decent dose of 4-AcO DMT orally. This was the easiest way to dose, and it was also quite effective. My excitement had been clouding my judgment up until now, as I was soon to realize I likely couldn’t afford a 6-8 hour trip experience into the night after work. I was scheduled to work both of my jobs the following day and staying up far too late would NOT have been fun for me.
It struck me. Inside, I felt a little soured. On initial realization, I had simply supposed I was just going to have to put off this desired experience until another, more suited day… but a finicky grin flashed onto my face then as I remembered the great deal of research I had done into the art of boofing, and how I had read it's a shorter experience - having a very noticeably shorter time to sobriety. Now, hear me out: I’m definitely not the straightest arrow. I am bisexual, and have enjoyed relationships with many individuals of both genders. What I have not done is anything with my own body, in any sort of penetrative way, at least. I was/am more than open to trying it, especially by myself firstly! The grin grew wider as I thought about it more and more. I felt even more motivated to trip this way, and try something new. My conscience was beginning to be guided by this whim, and a strong thirst for novelty. It was what I was craving initially, and now I had just found out how I could crank the novelty notches up by 3. I worked harder and faster as I began to put together devious, silly machinations pertaining to exactly how I would go about the process. My method was coming together… all that was left to do was clock out.
7:00pm; I dose the kratom. I take an extra gram than I usually do of it - roughly 3 grams worth - as I am a tad bit anxious of exactly how strong the upcoming trip is going to be. I had read in my research that boofing was a more intense experience relative to an equal dose taken orally, but shorter in turn. Having no idea what to expect or anything to really base it on, I didn’t want to expect it to be similar to an oral dose of the same amount in intensity. So I took a bit of a sedative to calm my nerves, and tie my kite-string to a pole, so to speak.
8:00pm; This hour could not have come faster. I had finished the entire extent of my job 30 minutes previous to this time on a Saturday, the busiest day of the week by FAR. I was moving with a purposeful quickness. I sang my favorite songs two tones louder as I blasted through my list of tasks. My drive and excitement for what I was soon to do was mounting even quicker than it was previously. I sat up in the lobby of my work place waiting impatiently, jamming out as I had been until I could at last clock out, and begin the 2 mile journey walk home. Now would begin step 1 of the aforementioned process/method I had planned out for the evening.
Step 1: Secure the keys! (Wait, that actually works—) Acquire necessary materials for rectal administration. I did not have the oral syringe, nor the lube, and I needed rubber bands as well. Why? You’ll see later. Near the end of my 2 mile journey stood a beacon of hope for obtaining all of these items in one glorious go. The CVS pharmacy. Engrossed in my ecstatic enthusiasm, I put on some KMD (a group of artists I’m currently really hyperfixatating on, if you like underground 90’s hip hop check em out!) and got myself out those entrance doors at twice the speed. The walk was a blur. I was just happily keeping along with the lyrics of the music and in no time at all, I was at the foot of the pharmacy - it’s illuminated fixtures inside bathing me in a soft glow and bringing my intentions back to light in my mind. I quickly headed to the back of the pharmacy, aiming for the baby aisle, where I had figured the oral syringes would be kept. Boom bada bing, there was only ONE left!! I snagged my tool and a jar of Vaseline, as well as a ruler. I had trouble finding where the rubber bands were kept, so I sought out the help of a store associate. I approached him with the COOLEST, most CONFIDENTLY happy demeanor. Before him stood a curly haired stranger holding a syringe, the jar of lubricant, a ruler and my bright, very much so obviously excited expression.
“Excuse me sir, where are the rubber bands kept?” He turns, “Oh, they’re right in the back left corn-“ he suddenly stops, his last syllable cut off, pausing to visually scan me and my items in hand over. I watch him do so, never once dropping my ear-ear smile. His tone faltered a bit upon speaking again, and there after I would notice him catching small glances at me from the counter. “N-need help with anything.. else while you’re here?” He asked after I had thanked him. I’m near certain he was at the very least, suspicious of the solo guy with a syringe and vaseline. Whether or not he was, I was driven. Once I had everything, I left as quickly as I entered. I held my plastic bag of products to be used for paraphernalia with incredible pride. I was so beyond ready. Homebound, I finished the last 15 minutes of my walk and entered the house, immediately moving onto step 2 of my process.
The Trip Report officially “begins” here. (Beware NSFW; if looking to skip it, skip next three paragraphs!)
8:45pm; Step 2: Ascend from Darkness! With the same speed I had on the clock and jamming home, I quickly entered the bathroom and laid out each of the necessary tools, as shown in the original post. I made that Reddit post just moments after then. First orders of business, measuring out my dose. I got my Gemini-20 Mg scale, the little baggie of 4-AcO, a toothpick and I began to scoop out little portions of the powder. The dosage I had initially prepped to take up my bum was 24mg; which - through conversions made by experienced users of AcO - is roughly equal to 3g Shrooms in intensity. The excitement was nerve-wracking now. I trembled in anticipation just the tiniest bit as I carefully continued to scoop the compound out of its container. With the dosage laid out, I tossed it into the little red sauce dish filled with roughly 3ml of water. I did not measure this amount of liquid out, but rather I took note of how much was in the syringe after plunging it up. In an optimal world I would do a perfect volumetric dose, however, I was far too excited to try and do so with the syringe, and I lack a beaker. Simply made do. I set the tiny dish down once nearly all of the powder had been dissolved, I set forth on preparing my anal weapon. In my research, I had read that 2cm was just as far as you needed to go inside the poop chute. I was very keen on just doing the bare minimum amount of insertion this first time around, as I did NOT want to mess this up. To ensure I hit the mark, I measured 2cm down the syringe, and fixed a rubber band on the mark I had left. The rubber band would act as a sort of stopper, giving me signal just when I needed to stop.
With everything ready, it was time. I was just seconds from being “fucked by The Universe”, as I had envisioned it and had put it in my own goofy mind. I was having far too much fun just in the perception of the experience and idea, but now it was time to see if this would be nearly as fun as I imagined it to be. I undressed, taking off my bottom layers and observing myself in the mirror expectantly as I did so. With the target exposed, I opened the jar of Vaseline and generously applied it to the target area. The cold touch of my fingers and Vaseline made me shiver just a bit on contact, but it felt good. I donned my boof contraption in hand, and inserted the tip into the off colored pool of sweet, sweet Clock Liquid. Steadily, I pulled the plunger back until I couldn’t anymore. I had it on the 2.5ml dosage setting, which I realize I most definitely should’ve set higher. Due to this, I did not get the full dose. In the syringe was most of the liquid, but in the dish must’ve sat like half a ml of liquid still. Still a bit anxious, yet even more excited still, I did not try to refill the syringe. I just said fuck it to the ~3-4mg that was likely floating around, and decided it would be best not to overdo it anyways. Clutched in my grasp was the ready to rock syringe, and my hand began it’s descent to my land down under. I look myself in the mirror one last time, close my eyes, and in it goes. Wow. Just for sake of public opinion, I won’t describe as extensively how much I really enjoyed this part of the experience, but there was no pain. I expected it to hurt and feel uncomfortable, but it was quite the opposite. The pleasure only ramped up as I got it far enough inside to feel the rubber band stopper, and dropped the load. What a strange sensation. I could feel the liquid seeping in, and it felt cathartic. The deed was done.
For a moment, I only stood there. Like a deer in headlights. Did I really just do that, for the first time? And did I really, really just enjoy it? Yes. Yes I did. Yes. I can now say that I’ve taken drugs up my ass now. And worse yet (in a comical sense) I can tell others I enjoyed it. I was just giddy, laughing to myself and thinking it all through. This experience simply shredded my previous fear/discomfort of any sort of penetration stuff, and I was there just processing the implications of this brand new self discovery. After a few minutes of looking at myself in the mirror and feeling incredibly happy with myself, and what I had learned already; I began to clean myself and my things up. The trip was now set in motion, all I need do was wait.
(SFW) Roughly T+00:05, 9:00pm; I took myself to the living room where I began conversing with the many people starting to appear under my post. It was blowing up! The interactions I had with others on Reddit really did positively influence the experience, I cannot entirely express my gratitude for all of those I had met and spoke with that night. I felt connected to all of them, and loved by them too. If you were there and now you’re reading this, thank you. Genuinely thank you so much for positively contributing to not only the experience, but supporting me too. To any new, first time viewers; firstly thank you sincerely as well, but maybe do consider going back and looking through the post! My conversations with others in the post does a good job of highlighting some of the psychological shifts I was experiencing under the influence. There's also a plethora of fantastic jokes/puns there. I trusted the internet to play with my butthole and it didn't disappoint. Anyways, onwards!
It had only been a little over 10 minutes later at 9:14 pm when I began to feel the comeup in all of its glory. I was feeling a bit of a mental shift previous to this, but since I had been feeling it since very shortly after the boof, I attributed it to placebo. There was no doubting the onset this time though. It began with warm, pleasurable head pulses. An out-growing warmth from the back center of my head. Pulsing, seeping into my thoughts and turning them into a churning soup of gold & amber. I felt incredibly warm and euphoric in the cranium at this time. The onset of psychedelic pleasure came even stronger this experience, and it was coming as a solid burst. Not in waves, as is classic of the oral experience. A smile grew on my face as a familiar voice began to speak internally, and make himself known. My inner, subconscious me.
On a day to day basis, I often converse with this inner me about thoughts, big decisions, or when I’m really focused on something. It genuinely has its own, slightly different perspective on my experiences in reality, and it’s quick to speak up when it has a different perspective to offer. It’s no more than a segment of my own mind-voice, however I believe it is not one that I fully pilot like my own. However, when I’m tripping - especially on 4-AcO - it’s like it becomes its own fully segmented person. One who cares for me incredibly deeply and only wants to see me succeed in my dreams and pursuits. One who is very akin to I, but with its own nuances. It sometimes feels like the best possible version of myself I can be. In my mind’s eye, I’ve always seen it as constantly morphing, always taking different forms sort-of-shadow-being. However in this experience, its form took a more descriptive, concrete shape of many amalgamations. And even now, post experience; the form that I imagine for it hasn’t changed. More about that later.
I believe and have believed for a while this imagined self/ego I possess is due to my trauma, and is a manifestation of it. I had a horrific upbringing, and spent a lot of time alone in neglect. I won’t dive into much detail in this report, although nowadays I’m a happily independent, much stronger individual. I’ve gotten through a lot of my trauma and hard feelings, but that mental mechanism never left. And I hope it never does. It’s been with me ever since a very young age in adolescence and has only grown in depth. It is a way of comforting myself, a method of analyzing data and information efficiently, and a novelty of my own mind.
T+00:25; 9:20pm: My thought streams and perspective in conscience were beginning to split and segment quite noticeably. My brain just felt absolutely BRIMMING with ideas upon this swelling onset, as the rush brought on by my chosen route of administration was quite strong. Much stronger than the rush of the oral route, although indeed comparable to what I had experienced through insufflation. In a matter of minutes, I had gone from sober, to coming up, to now tripping. As my skull became entirely engulfed in the euphoria, the visuals elicited themselves. They were most prominent following onset and for about 1 hour afterwards. Occasional shadows danced in my field of view, and items at a distance would wave gently. Colors were slightly enhanced, however it wasn’t particularly strong. The empathy and love I felt for the world, my family, my friends and myself was rapidly growing. I felt a heartwarming glow all over myself at this time and it stretched somewhat to what I was experiencing on Reddit. I spent a large chunk of this trip just talking to such lovely people there, just having a good ol time and spreading the love. I will admit; there was a time in the night I had a negative reaction to the criticism/confusion of a small portion of people under the post who wouldn’t/just couldn’t grasp my intentions. They were criticizing me for “wasting the time” to boof and for “being impatient” (regarding onset), but save for my initial, somewhat over the top reaction (which I apologized for and extended an olive branch over shortly there on), I would say it was well-handled.
I chose this route of administration because it greatly excited me from a novelty-chasing perspective and I was also feeling very confident in the pursuit of exploring myself. So I simply communicated that much to the naysayers and ignored them from there out if they continued with the rude advances. All part of the process of growth. The entire time I was on the platform, I was also conversing with and speaking to my own inner ego. It had manifested internally as a mash-up amalgamation of characters, people, and concepts that were role models for my development. When I closed my eyes, I could see it. Clear as day. It’s torso was a screen, one that constantly flickered through various pieces of media, it’s face, featureless. It had hair that resembled my own, curly long locks; but it was also modeled after a fictional character I closely associate to myself. It’s arms were nothing but geometric shapes, and they were rather animated. It had very amusing yet wise things to say about everything going on, and its contributions to my stream of thought is what prompted me to evaluate my rude reply to the naysayers. The entire time, it was almost like walking with and being in the shadow of a better, more grown me. It knew/knows how to speak in such a way that gets through to me, and how to take reign of the vast expanses of knowledge floating within my head to help guide me and help me reform. How to connect dots and move me forward from places of extreme darkness. It had done exactly that in a previous AcO trip, one where I had chosen to trip a night I felt emotionally tiny. I left the experience feeling inspired in my core, and to this day the lessons of that experience resonate with me. I’d have to speak on it another time.
As I sat here speaking to these people and analyzing my own thoughts and what was coming from me, I discovered the best element of the trip. The one that would define how the rest of the trip went in short. I was almost entirely lacking the wandering thoughts and emotional flare-ups I considered classic of the oral experience. As well as the speech stupor. Whenever I spoke to a family member it would come out a bit faster than normal, but coherent and complex. Eloquent/proper speech is not an oddity for me, and thusly, no one had suspected anything. Towards the tail end of the initial 60 minutes, I began to settle into a visual state of psychedelic cognitive enhancement/stimulation that would define much of the rest of the venture. At the time, I described it much as like “taking my adderall but with a visual, cognitive kick,” and that is exactly what it felt like.
At the time, I described it much as like “taking my adderall but with a visual, cognitive kick,” and that is exactly what it felt like.
Not nearly as stimulating or organizing of my executive function like Adderall is, but with its own twist on a similar feeling cognitive boost. I had so much to talk about, so much to say, and I cared about everyone. My stream of thought was perfectly split into two and I was thoroughly enjoying being in the presence of a second comical conversationalist asshole within my own mind. Putting my phone down for a bit to spend time to myself at around the 60 minute mark, now begins phase 2 of the experience:
Phase 2 - The family connection; T+1:05, 10:00pm: After a good while of hanging out on the webs, I figured it was time to either really look into myself or see what my family was up to. Normally, I would stay out of my family’s presence. My dad is a part of the abuse and my stepmom is just not a good person. I take issue with the way they choose to live and I am only months from leaving this place for college and not looking back. I simply seek to take away the harsh lesson in who not to be and in how I can grow to be a bigger individual. It’s different while tripping though. It’s almost like I can set aside all of the difficult feelings and questions I have regarding the nature of these people, and just live alongside them in harmony. When I look at my dad while sober, I just feel disgusted. He has an awful gambling issue which he refuses to acknowledge the existence of and he’s cost us a lot. He’s also gone to extreme lengths to chase this addiction. He tried to manipulate me while I was tripping once for money and I called him out for it. He attacked me. After and to this day, he still states I’m the one to blame for why he attacked me. That me calling him out for taking advantage of someone and for having an issue justifies him putting his hands on his son. I hope this brings to light my own perspective of why I choose to just walk out that door and never look back. I really just want to see him get better, but in his current state, he won’t. While tripping though, I can see him as my father, and respect the positive qualities he has that are buried and lost to years of alcoholism, stimulant abuse, gambling and generally wasting away.
Over the course of the next 90 minutes: I spent the time playing Xbox with him, enjoying his presence, and splitting my attention between him and my half-twin sister. Made plenty of jokes, laughed a lot, and got him in a good, happy mood. Towards the tail end of the night I bought something for him in one of the game’s he really likes playing. I love my sisters and take great care of them on a 24/7 basis. Always have, for I had to step to the plate when no adult would claim domain over us or care for us when I was only 11, and them younger. I told her I was tripping, as she has a good bit of experience herself and understands. She definitely found my choice of administration and my enjoyment of the method itself amusing, but not in a mocking way. She is very supportive of my bisexuality, and is lesbian herself. We kicked it for a little while, and this is when the weed makes it’s entrance to the experience. Between us we passed a bong packed full of good bud while just chatting. We spoke about how our youngest sister was starting to grow into her own identity, we spoke about what I was experiencing + my insights, our family and generally just hung. Upon my first hit of the bong, the visuals returned to their initial prominence. The walls danced in slight waves to the tune of the music we were enjoying, and I began to feel the first true bits of “intoxication” that I usually attributed to mushrooms/psilocybin. The weed helped elicit the forgetfulness/lack of surroundings that I commonly experience under the effects of a psych. I was misplacing items a good bit for a little while and was having troubles keeping track of small, handheld items like my phone or lighter. I spent the rest of the time passing my attention from sister to father, spending a few minutes with one and then moving back to the room the other was in. It was really enjoyable. Hanging with my sister always is but that night I felt extremely connected to her as I did everyone else. The only person who knew I was intoxicated at all was my sister.
Offset/comedown; T+2:30, 11:30pm: I began to settle back to sobriety and come down from my high up psychic perch around this time__. As aforementioned, the visual aspect of the experience was already subtle all throughout but it was this time I noticed the shadow tracers on the walls and on my hands fading away. My inner buddy was becoming less vocal, and even announced it would soon be his time to take a seat in the back again. I was settled in my bed, sleep mask and ambient music on at this time - enjoying the enhancement of mental imagery during the fleeting hours of my trip. I envisioned myself being “hugged” by my higher self, and we both communicated our enjoyment of the experience to each other. It was around 12am when I could tell I was nearly back to baseline. The self inside was there, but moreso only observing as it typically does. It only contributes when it has something contrasting to offer or when I address it directly. In either case though, it’s interactions with me are not nearly as personal nor in-depth while sober. My head felt cloudy and I was rather exhausted. Not quite ready for bed yet, so I spent the last bits of my trip catching up with the hundred or so comments I had yet to read on my post and replying to them, detailing my experience and my feelings.
I was very pleased with the turnout of the experience, the length and what I had learned about myself. The experience of boofing 4-AcO-DMT enlightened me on my inner workings, on my desires; on what I enjoy and the implications of it all. I saw myself potentially enjoying this method and route, yet I did not see myself coming out of this so changed and motivated. Compared to the oral route in similar dosages, the method of boofing was not more or less intense, but shifted I would say. It felt like there was a prominent focus on my psyche. My mind. Orally 4-AcO is eye candy but through this absorption method, the visuals felt more like an afterthought. The shortened experience is also really nice for any night you’re prepared to trip but are lacking the time for an extended trip. My own inner self image has developed further, and it continues to be a driving force in my ascent from this place I am in. It wants to see me with my world in my hands, my pockets full of bands and no longer holding on to emotional strands. Best yet, it seeks to guide me there. I will be revisiting this particularly carnal method of administration again.
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