It's Following Me
Amphetamines (Dexedrine)
Citation:   Neighbrhoodjunky. "It's Following Me: An Experience with Amphetamines (Dexedrine) (exp14016)". Erowid.org. Jun 21, 2007. erowid.org/exp/14016

 
DOSE:
  repeated oral Amphetamines (capsule)
BODY WEIGHT: 145 lb
A few years ago when I was about 13 a few friends and I had planned a party to avoid going to a school football game. We had invited as many people that we knew of that used drugs or alcohol at the time, which was not many. So what ended up happening was only one person besides my friend and I showed up. We drank all the beer we had at the house. It got a bit too boring for any of us to handle, so he took us up into his room where he took out a bottle of prescription medication. It said Dexedrine on the side. I had never heard of it before, so I just figured that he was trying to liven things up by giving us some kind of arthritis crap he stole from his grandmother. It was his prescription for ADD. They were only 5mg capsules, so I took 4 of them and he gave me another 8 or so to take home.

I waited and waited for them to kick in, but it didn’t seem like anything happened. So I got bored with the whole idea and left for home at around 11pm. When I walked in my door still I felt nothing. Or so I thought. I walked up into my mothers room and kneeled on the floor next to her and talked about everything that came to mind. Switching from subject to subject without even realizing it. I don’t think she noticed either. Not then anyway. At about 3:45am she told me to go and get some sleep because I sounded like I needed it. I went to my room and recorded tapes of me babbling of nothing, not making sense. I still have yet to listen to all of them, because I used more than 3 audio cassettes that night/next day.

Later on the next day I brought some over to a friend Jessie’s house, where we took the rest that I had. She couldn’t make it to the “party” because she wasn’t aloud out of her house. I don’t recall what we did that day, like many others. Most of the year after that point is all much of a blur to me. But I know we had some great times and some rough ones too. Everyday we would go over that friends house and either give him money or sleep with him for it. And after a while he got his dosage raised to 15mg. So that worked out fine for us. We would go for 5 or so days without food or sleep. Then we would crash in school and take more while we were crashing which only seemed to intensify the crash. Sometimes I would pass out in odd places. I would fall asleep while taking notes in school. One time when I fell asleep while writing I wrote down most of my dream. Interesting, no?

I was getting decent grades in school though. Although I don’t know how I pulled that off. We were busy dodging the police and the parents. We were homeless every now and then from running away or being kicked out for this or that. Staying behind convenient stores and such. Like I said. We had our tough times. But they were always followed by good times again. And that always seemed to drown out the bad ones and make them seem like more of a joke. More unrealistic than it really was.

Towards the end of this year of madness we created we were taking about 20-28 15mg capsules every 24 hours and I began to shake very badly, mumble when I spoke, and have almost constant hallucinations. This person, or thing, I should say, used to follow me around everywhere I’d go. It would tell me answers to tests. It would tell me what to say in conversations. And when I was alone in my room it would come from near my closet and just sit next to me and I would reach out my hand. It would touch my hand and a warm surge would flow through my body, starting at my hand, until I moved my hand away. All I could do was sit and smile, frozen in its warm glow. What did it look like? Well, its very hard to explain, but I think I’ve got it down. It was transparent, just made of all these squiggles of light. Like how I would imagine electric wax would look like. It bent the light in the room when it was there.

At the end of it all I was on probation for a prank phone call I had made sometime in between all of this mess and I had been using heroin. I failed a urine test from my probation officer and they locked me up, then sent me to rehab. I still have hallucinations like the ones I described, but much less than before. I’m on a lot of medication for it now. I don’t use Dexedrine anymore because right after I got out of rehab my friend who supplied it all got locked up himself. I would if I could find it again, though. Who ever would have thought that something I didn’t even think worked in the beginning would make so many changes for me in little over a year of my life.

Exp Year: 2002ExpID: 14016
Gender: Female 
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Jun 21, 2007Views: 9,764
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Amphetamines (6) : Health Problems (27), Addiction & Habituation (10), Sex Discussion (14), Entities / Beings (37), Retrospective / Summary (11), Not Applicable (38)

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