More than 2 million people use Erowid every month.
During the pandemic, only 70 of those contribute $1 or more.
Donations are down significantly. Please Contribute.
One More Hit, One More Chance
Crack Cocaine
by Crack
Citation:   Crack. "One More Hit, One More Chance: An Experience with Crack Cocaine (exp16250)". Erowid.org. Jul 24, 2002. erowid.org/exp/16250

 
DOSE:
  smoked Crack (powder / crystals)

BODY WEIGHT: 140 lb


All along I thought nothing could ever happen to me, but I was wrong. I was out of high school and going to college, working and partying on the side. I had done other drugs before like weed, coke and x, but this time I wanted to try crack. I did it with one of my ex-boyfriends who was a previous crackhead but had quit and bought quantities from his friend.

At first it was small amounts like $20 or $30 worth then it got to $100 a day. I started skipping college first to go get high, then work, finally I wouldn't even come home for days. I didn't know myself anymore and neither did my family. This went on for months, I would get mood swings when I didn't have any and I started pawning my things, even my sisters jewlery. We would go to hotel rooms to get fucked up and I remember crying every morning when the crack would finish.

I would try to blame these feeling of depression on my family and myself and I didn't give a damn about anyone. All I wanted was to do some rock and die if I had to. I began to isolate myself from family and friends that cared about me and didn't let anyone know about my problem. Anywhere we would smoke crack I would feel paranoia and my heart would race I felt like someone was out to get me or that someone was gonna catch me smoking. I dropped alot of weight because I wouldn't eat. I remember sleeping at 7 in the morning waking up at 3 or 4 P.M. taking a shower and then buying more crack and starting my same routine each day.

Now I think of all the time I wasted and the trust that was lost. I wouldn't have stopped if it wasn't for my oldest sister who went to get me. I had to move to another town and start my life again with no friends or nothing. Sometimes I think of going back to my hometown but the thought of crack hurts my chest and I can't take the chance of starting that shit again. I feel like I still want it sometimes, just one more hit on the coke can, one more inhalation of rock. I can't forget it, but I try to take one more chance in living my life and erase the past.

Exp Year: 2002ExpID: 16250
Gender: Female 
Age at time of experience: Not Given 
Published: Jul 24, 2002Views: 32,752
[ View as PDF (for printing) ] [ View as LaTeX (for geeks) ] [ Switch Colors ]
Crack (82) : General (1), Addiction & Habituation (10), Relationships (44), Various (28)

COPYRIGHTS: All reports are copyright Erowid and you agree not to download or analyze the report data without contacting Erowid Center and receiving permission first.
Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the individual authors who submit them.
Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid Center.


Experience Vaults Index Full List of Substances Search Submit Report User Settings About Main Psychoactive Vaults