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Blue & Black
Citation:   Maloi. "Blue & Black: An Experience with LSD (exp18759)". Erowid.org. Aug 10, 2005. erowid.org/exp/18759

2 hits oral LSD
This trip took place in the winter of 2001, my first year out of high school. I had first tried marijuana a year earlier and had taken a fondness to it, to say the least. The effects of drugs fascinated me so I was extremely eager to try LSD. I had already tried it a few months earlier but I had only felt ‘really high.’ Perhaps it was weak or maybe it took more to break my tolerance.

When my very close friend told me that he wanted to try LSD and could get it, I told him, ‘Don’t worry man, I’ve done it, I know what it’s like.’ I was wrong. We each took a double dipped Smartie candy and drove back to my house to hang out for awhile. Frustrated from feeling no effects, we made ourselves a bong from a three liter soda bottle and took a few hits. We went back into the kitchen, where the cat, Chester, was having a little nibble on some food. We found this to be the funniest thing in the world and were laughing harder than ever at the cat chomping down on his food. When the cat was done and we had fully realized that now we were tripping, the cat began weaving around our feet, looking up at us. I had this feeling that the cat knew we were tripping, even that it was his fault! Thus came the cat’s nickname, Tripmasta Chesta.

It took us forever to get out of the house and when we finally did, we did the most moronic thing in the world, got into the car. At the time though, this was not moronic at all. We felt completely clear headed, carefree, jovial, playful, and better than I think either of us had felt in a long time. We were acting calm and normal, only much more enthusiastic and fascinated. In the car we popped in the White Album by the Beatles and sang along, driving in the cold snowy weather. We went to a nature preserve and walked around for awhile, amazed at the beauty of the snow covered forest. Then my friend remembered an even more beautiful place to walk around and we drove there. It was a nature preserve called Plotterkill, in the hills of upstate NY. We wandered around the forest, no cares for time or temperature or even direction for that matter. We looked out over the hills into the valley and the hills beyond and could not stop commenting on the beauty of the natural surroundings. We talked about we felt and the experiences were completely similar except with the natural difference in perception. We felt like so much information was entering our minds at one time, like our brains were melting or going to explode. We felt emotions and feelings that we did not even recognize, as if the drug had opened pathways in our brain that we rarely used or have never even accessed. All of the bullshit in the world, the bullshit that I was only slowly coming to realize, was thrown in my face at that exact moment and I saw the world in a way that completely changed the way that I had been approaching it. We stood in silence as I played with a plastic wrapper in my hands. It crackled as loud as bonfire.

We then made our attempt to leave the preserve which was somewhat difficult for a few moments when we looked around and all for the trees looked similar and direction was impossible to determine. Then, logical thinking back in order, we recognized a tree with a small pink spray paint mark and found our way out and back to the car. Coming back down from the hills, ‘Revolution 9’ on the White Album came on and turned into utter chaos, panic ensued and my friend suggested I turn it off. I did and the calm atmosphere returned.

From there we went to a supermarket and a diner. I have no idea, or no remembrance, of why we were at the supermarket. However, I do remember walking around feeling almost superior in a way than all the other shoppers. Not superior in a conceited way, but in that I felt I was on another level from them. A level of higher awareness, not concerned with trivial things like groceries and daily troubles. There was life to lived! We looked each person we walked past directly in the eyes with a huge smile on our faces. We were on acid and damn proud of it!

At the diner I ordered French toast. I’m not quite sure what my friend ordered; food was of little importance. I barely finished my French Toast, it tasted like wet cardboard. We talked a lot about people and the way they view life, how were we feeling on the drug, how good yet incredibly intense it felt. I wanted to feel like that forever, to forever explore the world on acid with my friend. Yet, I still had the common sense to recognize that the real world and the daily routine would not permit such a lifestyle and neither would my sanity or health. But in that moment though, we bonded, as if by looking into each other’s eyes, we could feel one another’s thoughts. It was not as if we actually heard each other’s voice in our mind or that random images flashed by. It was simply an understanding of intent. A complete relinquishment of barriers and norms and hidden emotion. It was trust and truth and caring and dependence and love.

We talked about a lot in that diner, we were probably there an hour and a half. We talked about our pasts and my friend revealed to me a memory that he had never told anyone in his life, only his parents were aware of it. He was nearly crying but it was obviously years and years of aggression and frustration and insecurity pouring out. We told each other how incredibly grateful we were to have tripped with one another but more importantly, our gratitude to have one another as a friend.

When the time came to pay the bill, my visual hallucinations were fairly strong but not like I had heard them described by other people. These were merely vibrant colors and prominent, dramatic patterns on the wood grain of the table and the wall paper. I saw the creamer swirling around in the coffee as if a hundred times magnified. I could see every curl and slippery movement of each tendril of creamer. I was, for the first time, aware of the hundreds of little lines, all differently shaded, that make up a simple thing like coffee creamer in coffee. When we pulled out the money to pay the bill, it looked like nothing to us. My friend shrugged his shoulders and pulled all of the cash from his wallet and tossed it on the table carelessly. It was paper and the concept of it being used to get things seemed suddenly so ridiculous and unnatural and necessary. However, our reality instinct kicked in and prevented us from leaving all the money there.

As we left the diner, as throughout the entire day, time seemed nonexistent. It felt like we had been on acid forever and that we always would be. We were aware that the day was ending, that it was getting dark and turning to night but the impulse to inquire of the time, to feel restrained by it, to care about it in general, was not there. There were more important things to think about and it was merely something man made.

As we began coming down, we both wrote a little in a journal I had brought along. Here is a sample of some writings of my friend:

‘It is so good to have a little reality check once in awhile… The mind is amazing. Music is the language of life to the fullest sense… Questions. Ahh… How nice. Simplify, simplify, simplify, simplify, simplify… Why do we fight when we are all the same… Life is not complicated it’s the people in it who complicate things.’

Here is a little of what I wrote:

‘Why is there so much obsession over nothing? It’s all nothing when you come down to it. Just thoughts flowing by and passing through, coming forward and revealing themselves. Dismiss them… I wish I could do so many things, so many things. I wish I could live with all of this.’

We finished off our night by listening to Pink Floyd’s The Dark Side of the Moon (of course) and reattempting ‘Revolution 9’ while looking at computer screen savers of objects flying towards the screen. The shape and angle of the objects (stars, for instance) was always changing and jumping from the screen in some cases. Sometimes I was looking up at rainstorm, other times down a wormhole, zipping across light-years.

We both were exhausted around 3 am after watching Fight Club. Halfway through, the high pretty much faded away and the movie was like any other movie, great, but still just a movie. I headed home and went to bed, sleeping far into the next day. I still get chills when I think about that day though, I physically feel a rush of energy and fondness. It is definitely up there as one of the best days of my life thus far and marks a landmark, a destination change for me. I felt that a mystery or two of self-identity had been chipped away that day. It was uncanny. I was driving a car around, walking around public places, thinking more logically (but still less educated) than I had before and I loved it. Every single moment, even moments of panic were thrilling and amazing and interesting. I never once got bored or wished to be somewhere else or with any other person. I felt like we were brothers, like we had bonded for life.

Many people say that the legitimacy of the feelings I experienced is questioned because I was on LSD. They think that because it is a drug that I am not myself, that feelings and emotions and thoughts are not real but all manifested by the drug itself. But that is impossible because the only way that a person’s thoughts, feelings and emotions and can be perceived is by that person manifesting those things, by our own minds. The drug LSD is not random thoughts and weird emotions splattered on a Smartie or sugar cube or piece of paper. I have no shame in admitting that LSD played a large part in ‘changing in my life,’ because it is absolutely true. Had I not nor ever done LSD or done it with a less familiar person, I would not be the exact person I am today, close, but not exact. It helped me greatly to come to terms with what I really wanted to value, achieve and learn about in life and the kind of person that I want to become. I believe that everyone should try LSD at least once with their closest friend or even just friends they are very comfortable talking to and being around and in a comfortable place, most preferably in nature. There is something about the man made world that is incredibly less appealing than the natural one and this is amplified ten times on acid. Stories and accounts of trips, including this one, cannot even come close to describing the actual experience, the feeling of it when it’s good and the numerous benefits one can derive from taking LSD. It’s truthful and genuine description are out of the realm of language.

Exp Year: 2001ExpID: 18759
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Aug 10, 2005Views: 22,423
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LSD (2) : General (1), Small Group (2-9) (17)

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