Citation: Heather. "Fun, But Almost Too Fun: An Experience with MDMA (exp19580)". Erowid.org. Dec 12, 2002. erowid.org/exp/19580
||(pill / tablet)
| T+ 1:30
||(pill / tablet)
Ecstacy is definitely my drug of choice, though I don't do it very often. Why? 1. I think it's not good for you 2. It's expensive 3. I have a very addictive personality and 4. My last experience with it was kind of shitty. It's the kind of thing that is fun, but too fun. Know what I mean?
Anyway. My last experience with ecstacy wasn't very fond. It was Halloween night, 2002, and I decided to buy two rolls (pills) off of a friend I had rolled with for the very first time only a few months before. For two it cost $40 (the price varies), which wasn't too bad.
Since there weren't any parties worth going to, I popped them back at my dorm and chilled with my close friend J.
J had never done or seen anybody on Ecstacy before, so she thought it would be interesting to watch me. Kind of like an experiment, since she was considering trying ecstacy in the near future.
I took the first one around 11:00pm. Both of them had @ symbols stamped into them. They were pink with white dots, and one had a brown dot. I was told the white dots were cocaine and the one brown dot could possibly be heroin. I honestly don't know if that was true, which is pretty irresponsible on my part for not figuring that out before ingesting them. But oh well.
Approximately an hour and a half after I took the first one nothing was happening, which was disappointing. I contemplated whether or not they were real or just bunk. I was kind of pissed, so I took the other one. Big mistake.
About ten minutes later I got a major body buzz and realized they were in fact the real shit. I decided to take a shower, which felt INCREDIBLE. By the time I got out of the shower my pupils were fucking huge and I enjoyed staring into the mirror. I thought I was the most beautiful girl alive at the time. I looked so friendly and silly with my pupils dialiated so much. I also felt very lightweight. Climbing up to my bunk bed was the easiest thing in the world.
For the next couple hours or so I spent talking nonstop, smoking cigarettes, biting on my pacifier (perfect for rolling), and cuddling with J. Making out is fun, though sex is rather difficult because it's hard to orgasm. Just being touched or touching things is great because it's magnified. Being massaged anywhere feels absolutely incredible, especially if you use Vicks Vapo-Rub. It's like, if you were to lightly touch your skin, it would feel like someone was rubbing it really fast. Warm, tingly and 'mmmmm'.
Having completely forgotten that I took a little too much for my liking, I hit my peak. My heart started racing really fast and I didn't feel so great. I decided to curl up into a little ball on my floor. J was there to keep me company and rub my back. I didn't like how fast my heart was beating -- it felt like it was going to jump out of my chest and explode.
It only got worse. At the worst part of the peak my jaw started chattering so hard it eventually locked into place. I was grinding down on my pacifyer and rocking back and forth waiting for it to pass. I kept repeating, 'Go away', not to J, but to the drug itself. I just wanted it to stop, but I knew that wasn't going to be happening anytime soon. In a panic I tried drinking water but it felt like I was drinking sandpaper. My mouth felt like a desert and puckered up. My eyeballs felt like they were being squeezed, jiggling around in their sockets. I was extremely lightheaded and was breathing very deeply, trying to calm down and slow my heartbeat.
While all this was going down, I got very scared of dying. I kept thinking about my parents, thinking about how devestated and heart-broken they would be if they found out I died from taking drugs. J started to get a little frightened watching me blow up so hard, but she took very good care of me, telling me I wasn't going to die and that everything was going to turn out alright.
Once my peak passed I was in a state of pure bliss for the next four hours. I couldn't stop smiling and having a conversation was so enjoyable. I made perfect sense in everything I said and found myself to be incredibly articulate in speaking and word-choice. I opened myself up a lot emotionally to J. I was abnormally confident and calm. It was beautiful and the experience definitely brought us closer together.
Once the sun was starting to come up J fell asleep and I went outside and stood on the roof of the parking garage adjacent to my dormatory. There wasn't anybody else outside and people were just starting to get up and go to work. I watched the cars go by on the streets below and smoked five cigarettes back to back. They felt so good, like ice flowing in and out of my lungs. I was in a very giggly, euphoric mood. The sun was finally up and warmed my entire body. It was slightly cold outside, but the sun wrapped me in a warm blanket and I could not wipe the smile off my face.
Aside from taking a tad too much, this roll was decent. Blowing up that hard sucked though and I wish I wouldn't have gotten so impatient and taken both pills.
My least favorite part about ecstacy is feeling like shit afterwards. For some, including myself, ecstacy can leave you feeling depressed for a few days afterwards. It sucks, but it passes over time.
Here are things I've learned that make my Ecstasy experiences better:
1. I like to be in a comfortable environment with people I trust, like close friends or even a love interest. It's nice to have someone who is willing to take care of me if I am having a bad experience.
2. I drink plenty of water before, during (if I can), and after. By not drinking enough water I put yourself at risk of dehydration and possibly overheating, which can send me on a trip to the emergency room. Not fun.
3. I like to have something to chew on since ecstacy makes my jaw clench quite a bit. A pacifyer (my personal favorite), chewing gum, a washcloth. I use something safe and tooth-friendly.
4. I shouldn't have gotten impatient and taken too much. Even if I think the stuff isn't going to kick in, I should wait at least two hours before upping my dosage. Taking too much is a real shitty way to die.
5. I should test my pills. These days, people cut pills with all sorts of shit (cocaine, heroin, pcp, etc.). I can never be 100% sure what's in your pills until I get them tested. I can test the pills myself by purchasing a kit or by taking them to a booth sponsored by DanceSafe or any other ecstacy-friendly organization. These places are often found at raves or even on college campuses.
6. I like to have some fun supplies. Vapo-Rub, menthol cigarettes, water, orange juice, glowsticks.
COPYRIGHTS: All reports are copyright Erowid and you agree not to download or analyze the report data without contacting Erowid Center and receiving permission first.
Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the individual authors who submit them.
Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid Center.