DOSE:

oral

Nutmeg

(ground / crushed)

BODY WEIGHT:

178 lb

I went to the local natural foods shop and bought a big bag of pre-ground nutmeg. It was about 2 bucks and there was a lot. My friend and I were doing this together -- we each got a glass of water, put 2 tablespoons in, stirred up the water, and tried to drink it. We realized it was hard to get down with one glass, so we tried more, I forget how many it took. Let me warn everyone that the stuff tastes like absolute shit and it is *impossible* to eat without water -- I think when I put it in my mouth, it absorbs a lot of water or something, so I can't produce any saliva to swallow it... that's just a theory and I'm not really sure.

Anyways, by this point my friend got pretty sick to his stomach -- luckily I felt no sickness. About 3 hours later, the effects began. This was the second major mind altering drug next to alcohol that I had done. I told my friend that I was feeling something and he said it must be placebo. I thought he might be right, but I realized as it got stronger, no -- this was for real.. I was *definitely* high. My friend still didn't believe me. The high must have been comparable to marijuana, however at that time, I hadn't tried pot yet, so I can't be sure; but I remember losing concentration a lot and paying too much attention to pointless things. We went into a video store and I'd stare at a poster, and then realize that we were supposed to be looking for a movie. We got What About Bob.. payed for it, and started to walk home. Still, my friend had no high, and he didn't for the rest of the night -- I think I consumed a little more than him, because he was too sick to have it all, but I don't think it was too much of a difference.

By this time, my high had grown a lot. My mind was thinking in a network of thoughts; worthless thoughts that all seemed to fit together; well, I can't say worthless because I can't quite remember exactly what they were. But every 10 seconds I'd have a new thought, and it would remind me of another thought I just had, and another thought that reminded me of that, and so on... these thoughts were linking together and forming some pattern, and my mind was just thinking more and more and more thoughts. I don't remember how long this lasted. I don't know if the next stage was a continuum of this or if the thoughts went away. It's been 2 years since the experience so I can't quite remember.

But by this time, we were home and the movie was plopped into the VCR. As the movie went on, I had no clue what was going on. No concept of the plot at all. I didn't even know who Bob was. I tried to focus on the movie, but my mind just *couldn't* -- it was impossible to comprehend. My mouth was getting REALLY dry. I got a glass of water (or my friend got it for me, can't remember), I'd drink it, and once it was done my mouth wasn't any better at all. So I'd keep drinking water -- to no avail. I was getting hot and sweaty. The high now wasn't too pleasant. I think the movie was over when I decided to go upstairs and go to sleep (this was at my friend's house), but I can't remember. I walked up the stairs... suddenly I was in his room (which is right next to the top of the stairs) and then I was halfway up the stairs and then I was in his room again -- it was like time was being distorted.. imagine this:

my experience of time

<--------------------------------------------------------------------->

Event A ---- Event B ---- Event C

the above is this clipping of me walking up and down the stairs had I not been experiencing this time hallucination. Below is what I really perceived -- with the hallucination.

my experience of time

<------------------------------------------------------------------------->

Event A ---- Event B ---- Event A ---- Event C ---- Event B

This time hallucination lasted about 15 seconds and was over... INTENSE. It freaked the hell out of me! What happened, is that I remembered the past events (being at the top, middle, or bottom of the stairs) so vividly that my mind actually relived them -- I read about it about a year later... can't remember the name for the phenomena.

So I ran downstairs as fast as I could and told my friend. He helped me walk upstairs so nothing would happen like me passing out and rolling down the stairs and breaking my neck or something (exaggerated).. I went upstairs and lay down... ahh... And then.. in the background.. there was this feeling.. no, a sound, rather.. maybe a feeling... anyways it was this... 'feelound' in the back of my brain.. it gradually grew louder and more intense.. louder.. LOUDER.. And now it was so loud that it HURT my HEAD -- it got LOUDER and LOUDER AND I COULDN'T STAND IT AND IT WAS SPLITTING MY BRAIN IN TWO -- IT WAS SO INTENSE AND SO STRONG AND SO PAINFUL THAT I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!! AAAHHHH!!!!AHHHH!!!!!AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (and then I moved my head slightly) silence. But the feelound came back.. and it grew.. and it GREW. AND IT GREW!!! AND IT WAS TEARING MY BRAIN APART AGAIN -- AAAHHH!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and I twitched my head.. and it started, again, very silently. And I twitched my head so it wouldn't grow.. and I twitched my head.. over and over and over.. I kept twitching my head so the horrible feelound would not take control of my sanity.. So I kept twitching my head until I realized that I better get to sleep and I couldn't get to sleep if I kept twitching my head like this.. So the feelound came back.. it grew and GREW AND GREW AND GREW!!!!!!!! twitch. no, I couldn't let it do that. It would be easier to get to sleep by twitching my head over and over than letting the feelound conquer my brain. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. it's 2 in the morning and I HAVE TO GET TO SLEEP!! twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. No!! I have to do SOMETHING!! ANYTHING!!

I can't go on like this all night!!! What can I do? No -- my friend is asleep, and won't listen to me... anyways, even if I told him, he couldn't do anything.. What would he do anyways, take me to a hospital where they'd know I did drugs? Tell his parents so they'd know I did drugs? No.. nothing can be done...... Nothin... it's so late, nothing can be done... Oh my god, this sucks. This really sucks big time.. I'll never do any drug again.. NEVER NEVER NEVER... It's not worth it ... This SUCKS... twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. twitch.. etc. etc.. for so long I didn't think it would ever end.

The next morning-- I was awake, my mom came to pick me up... I was really zonked. I felt spaced. I still couldn't concentrate. I now had to go to band camp today. Well, my mom was taking me there and I saw my face in the mirror and it was whiter than hell. 'Have you been drinking?', my mom asked. 'No.' I got to the high school band room and we took attendance, etc. people wondered why I was so pale. I told some of them. We got on the buses and I just sat in my seat, completely out of it. I didn't really talk to anyone the whole ride up.. We got there and it was a relief to have a room to be in, but there were a lot of responsibilities at band camp - not really the first day, though.. But the second day came, and I was still in a dreamy/zonked/out-of-it/hangover. I was lost. I was confused. I had to work on my music!! My instructor explained the mallet parts to me and I tried to do them well, but I didn't understand. He'd say something and I was lost. What was wrong with me, he must have thought.

The third day, still there, but less... the fourth day, basically gone, maybe a little bit left.. And finally, I could continue with my life... No, I didn't keep up with the idea that I should never do drugs. I figured it was just nutmeg. And it was, basically. I've always had strong reactions to drugs. The first time I smoked pot, it hit me like a 2x4 and I literally fell down -- or I spontaneously lay down because the onset was so overwhelming and unexpected. The second time I did shrooms was my friend's first time, and interestingly enough, his experience was stronger. I had a hard time dealing with shrooms, mostly because of the conditions in which I was. But nutmeg's different -- it doesn't matter if it's set or setting -- if I'm going to have a bad reaction, I'm going to have it, at least if it's something like a feelound -- I wish I could have stopped the feelound.. Maybe I could have just stood up and walked around and it would have gone away because I'd be constantly moving.. But I was too zonked to even think about that.. Twitching was easier, anyways.

But the overall experience wasn't really worth it, even without the feelound. The dry mouth, the 3-day hangover. Personally, I'll never do nutmeg again in my life, I guess that goes without saying, though. If I just had sleeping pills, I would have only had to go through 5 - 10 minutes of the feelound instead of a whole hour or two (maybe it wasn't even half an hour, I don't know, I have no idea, but it felt like eternity).

Exp Year: 2002	ExpID: 20001
Gender: Not Specified
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Oct 5, 2005	Views: 16,750
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Nutmeg (41) : First Times (2), Difficult Experiences (5), Various (28)