DOSE:

360 seeds

oral

Morning Glory

BODY WEIGHT:

270 lb

Monday, July 9, 2003, beginning about 6:30 p.m.

I was walking around Wal Mart, and just sort of 'bumped into' the gardening section. Out of curiosity, I decided to check if they had MG seeds. I found them. I remembered that one of the ones with 'blue' in the name were considered the best. I only found 'Heavenly Blue' and 'Blue Star' So I bought 3 of each, each pack containing approx. 60 seeds. I got a coffee grinder while I was at it, since I've often needed one for these little 'experiments' never had one on hand.

I got them home, played with my 'sharks', powdered the MG seeds. I put them into orange juice, having this crazy idea that for some reason, not only would the acid in the OJ 'enhance' the trip somewhat (by getting more of the active chemical out of the seeds), but it would also neutralize any nausea factor. Well, it did - I got no nausea at all (Note: I later found out I don't have a nausea reaction to MG seeds, even full-strength and plain, so the OJ may or may not be helpful for anybody). At first I just drank 1/3 'in case' it would make me as violently nauseous as it seems to make some people. After 20 minutes, it didn't, so I drank another 1/3, and finished it off about another 20 minutes later, around which time I was beginning to feel the effects.

At first, I didn't really notice too much, just a 'feeling'. A rather deceptively-gentle 'feeling'. Then I began to notice that the posts I was making to the internet were getting a bit more 'charged' than usual, that I was beginning to have something to say about anything I read. I had the presence of mind to realize that some of my posts would read like inane ramblings to others, and so decided to quit posting for awhile. I felt like I had something to say, however, which needed to be written. So I opened up MS Word and started typing my thoughtstream.

The next 2 or 3 hours was absolutely fantastic. I explored the depths of my own psyche and 'reality' much more deeply than ever before, and have it all on my computer (still). It was amazing how well-coordinated my fingers were with my mind, because I was typing faster than I've ever typed before. Normally, I'm a very fast typist anyway, going at about 110 wpm with about 98% accuracy. Yes, that's my real speed. But on this trip, I was typing as fast as I was thinking. I could just have a thought, and it would fly out the end of my fingers and into the keyboard before I even realize the process was set in motion. I kept going on the thoughtstream for awhile, and decided to observe my hands while doing this. I pulled myself together as good as I could, and at one point while I was typing, I really couldn't see my fingers. They were all blurs from moving so fast. Of course, that could be part halleucination, but when I'm really 'fired up', it pretty much _almost_ like that even when I'm sober.

There were some men hanging out on the landing outside my apartment with my next door neighbor. They're often there, they just chill out, drink and yak. But as it turns out, they actually could hear me typing, and were commenting about it. I realized that the noise might bug them later when they decided to try sleeping. I'm not generally the type to have paranoid thoughts, and these guys really do often talk loud enough for me to understand their conversation. So I'm not sure, from my current sober position, if this was something I really heard or something I just hallucinated. My typing _was_ awfully loud, so it wouldn't surprise me either way.

Later on, my brain seemed to finally run out of steam with the words. So I got up & walked around. My body felt like a puppet, like I was off in some 'distant place' controlling it through a connection rather than from truly within it. I could feel my own breathing, and at the same time became aware of not just merely 'my body', but _two_ bodies. I recognized it as a state some call 'Dreaming Awake' (reference Carlos Castaneda), but which I refer to as 'Lucid Sleepwalking'. I could feel two of me coinciding in the same space, both breathing, both 'walking' around and sharing - for the moment - the same space. I then began an extraordinarily vivid & detailed trip re-living some of the lives, memories & thought patterns of other people. I 'remembered' my late grandmother's life, and everything I knew about it played out in vivid detail just like it were happening to me. Of course, one reason I doubt any 'mystical' interpretation for this memory experience is the fact that I only 'remembered' things which I actually know of the woman. That's quite a lot. But my mind put it together in such a way that I could see connections and details of the experiences which had never occurred to me before, and which I was grateful to have.

This went on for hours, me 'remembering' experiences as various other people - mostly relatives - from their perspective. Whatever the origin of these experiences, they provided some intense insight into the personas of many of the people I care about. Things I probably could have discerned by some really intense concentration were I sober, but which seemed to just 'flow' through me as though it were purely natural for one body to experience life as another.

I was able to record many of these experiences as well. Then at one point, I began deciding to try indulging my lust. I pulled up some porn, but every picture I looked at was just, like, '*so* totally _everything_', if you know what I mean. I just stared at each picture, revelling in the luxuriant details present in the picture. I could see the universe in these images, and oddly enough, I could also 'see' these images in the universe. Of course, when you're into philosophical territory _that_ deep, all horniness tends to disappear, and mine did. It was about that point that I became aware of the 'convergence' of everything. All time as 'now', all space as 'here', all people as 'everything' and each quark as the universe, itself. Just a very interesting experience, like looking at something and determining somehow that infinity = 0 (zero). A most fascinating way to look at the universe.

Also while walking around, I 'left' for a moment. It's like I lost consciousness in my mind, and when I returned, had 'memories' of sorts. In a few words, you could say that this is what I 'remembered': if you know 'planck length' and 'planck time', you're already familiar with it. If you don't, these units of measurement are considered the smallest possible unit of measurement that can exist in this universe. Physicists have learned that the universe likely occurs in discreet 'jumps', much like frames in a movie, and that each frame encompasses one unit of time known as a 'Planck second'. Well, what I 'remember' is what happens _between_ those 'Planck seconds'. The universe is 'shut off' for a moment in between Planck seconds, and when it is, a whole other layer of 'existence' is stacked right on top of it, permeating it and stretching through it in extremely inconceivable ways. And my experience was that an eternity passes between each Planck second, even though the instant we're 'off' is so very tiny. I felt this reality, then the 'infinite' that exists between moments, then this reality again.

This world soon began flickering before me just like frames in a movie, and the space between moments dominated my awareness. Truly, in the few seconds that this happened, I felt ancient, eternal, always present, able to 'phase out' and 'slip out' of this world by simply hanging on to 'the space between' and letting go of our 'moments'.

I had a few more adventures in this state, but I think this report may be getting too long. So that's the best of it, I believe. At least, the most 'understandable.' So I'm going to finish for now. I definitely recommend this, and as always, I recommend starting safe. Don't just jump into a moderate or high dose for your first trip. I took about 120 seeds the week before, and while it wasn't 'trippy' in the 'cool' sense of the word (no visuals, no intense insights, no voices, just a rapidly accellerated version of my normal thoughtstream), it gave me enough of a foretaste to prepare me for this experience. I'd recommend this 'foretaste' trip highly, because just jumping into this experience unprepared might have been too much for me. Just a word of caution, that's all.

Exp Year: 2003	ExpID: 24498
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Nov 25, 2004	Views: 22,140
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Morning Glory (38) : General (1), Alone (16)