Finding Beauty in a Sea of Masks
2C-I, MDMA/MDA, Cannabis, Selegeline, Piracetam, Alcohol & Alprazolam
Citation:   nanobrain. "Finding Beauty in a Sea of Masks: An Experience with 2C-I, MDMA/MDA, Cannabis, Selegeline, Piracetam, Alcohol & Alprazolam (exp28270)". Nov 9, 2003.

T+ 0:00
5.0 mg oral Pharms - Selegeline  
  T+ 0:59 1600 mg oral Piracetam  
  T+ 0:59 100 mg oral MDMA (pill / tablet)
  T+ 0:59 40 mg oral MDA (pill / tablet)
  T+ 1:45 8.0 mg oral 2C-I (powder / crystals)
  T+ 2:00 100 mg oral MDMA (pill / tablet)
  T+ 2:00 40 mg oral MDA (pill / tablet)
  T+ 5:00 100 mg oral MDMA (pill / tablet)
  T+ 5:00 40 mg oral MDA (pill / tablet)
  T+ 0:59 1 glass oral Alcohol - Beer/Wine (liquid)
  T+ 10:30 1.0 mg oral Pharms - Alprazolam (pill / tablet)
  T+ 0:59   repeated smoked Cannabis (plant material)
The following story of pure fiction is intended for mature audiences only; all events, places and names therein have no resemblance to any such in reality. The story contains references to polydrug use, specifically:

MDMA: 300 mg, approximate, oral;
MDA: 120 mg, approximate, oral;
2C-I: 8 mg, oral;
Marijuana: 7 g, approximate, smoked;
L-Deprenyl: 5 mg, oral;
Piracetam: 1,600 mg, oral;
L-Phenylalanine: 1,000 mg oral;
Alprazolam: 1 mg, oral;
Stella Artois beers: 5, oral

In addition, the imaginary tale is filled with vile words, stochastic conclusions and other such offending material. Standard and extra special warnings apply kids, NEVER DO THIS.

So the Sunday started as usual -- with a hangover! Just kidding folks, the day started out great. Plenty of sleep last night, Monday is a day off, Tuesday is an Australian public holiday, and after a week of wouldn't kick your dog out weather, the sun graced our faces during morning coffee and croissants on the back porch.

For the record I am in mid thirties, male, 180cm/70kg, with about 20 years of experience with psychedelics, a byproduct of which is extremely high tolerance to MDxA type compounds. Surprisingly enough, I am also healthy and health conscious.

The Soulmate, a professional musician and an artist of acclaim also had the long weekend fairly free, no mandatories, and although a non-participant in any of the forthcoming, or for that matter, any of my pharmaceutical activities, blessed me with her loving, courageous and very feminine presence. Did I mention beautiful?

So after the morning coffee kicked in, augmented with 1000mg of l-phenylalanine, 1,600mg of Piracetam and 5mg L-Deprenyl (standard nootropics regimen, the remaining five or so neurons need all the help they can get), the sun still stubbornly shone through the gusts of clouds, and we realized there is no way of weaseling out of the working bee at the gardens. By this time it was 11:00 A.M.

T 0:00 On our way out, I happened to glance at a copy of PIHKAL innocently open on the coffee table, right on some obscure chemical, Entry No. 33. From nowhere, the Psychedelic Spirit took possession, halting me midstep. Several large cones (this is what us Aussies call bong loads) of high quality local hydro mull mix were needed to calm the restless soul, yet the desire for alternate and altered perception remained.

The solution became evident, I had to eat a Greenback - a very strong MDMA/MDA combo pill, tested, unusual in that it is dual-colored - green one half, white the other half, not dyed. A lazy-hazy ambulation to the gardens with the Soulmate talking about nothing and everything, touching her brown skin (she gets mistaken for Brazilian) and running my hands through her waist-long hair.

T 0:15 Ah the working bee, the compost heap that needs a'choppin and the sun, and the AXE with which to chop, good grip yyeah, AARGH! As the typical effects of MDMA became pronounced, a brightening of the visual aspect and a general mood lift - I became Coner The Axe Wielding Barbarian on top of the compost heap, the roots and weeds didn't have a chance!

Soon, with an axe in each hand, I devolved to a green goop-covered grinning, chopping madman, the bastard son of a thousand maniacs, or was that Freddy Krueger? Sweating under the hot sun, chopping away, scaring old ladies to be sure, feeling each muscle move in tandem, grrreat!

T 1:45 By this point the compost heap was leveled, the blisters on both hands fully formed, and the effects of the Greenback were in need of augmentation. The Soulmate was resting in the sun, surprised at my manly, sweaty prowess (grin), and although both highly erotically charged, we were unable to take the opportunity, this being in a public place. alas, a swift walk home, several more cones, hmmm, there was sumethin-somethin missing.

A synchronicitous occurrence -- approximately 8 mg of 2C-I, a substance unexplored but much researched, fell into my mouth, seemingly materializing right from the pages of the Shulgins' book. The taste was almost lacking but slightly off-bitter, not at all unpleasant at this experimental dose, washed down with apple juice.

What the fuck are you doing? - asked my Internal Observer, but a check of vital signs and emotional-spatial landscape confirmed the set, setting, time and intention were correct for the upcoming adventure.

T 2:00 A review of the morning's activities over some coneloads smoked to the background of Hallucinogen in Dub reasoned my way clear to chewing another Greenback, some cones to follow the well beaten path. By this time the effects of the initial MDMA dose were giving way to the push of MDA, which manifested as appearance of often described smoke-ring type peripheral visual effects and a strong Kundalini push from the lower shakras.

T 2:30 The effects of the second Greenback are kicking in, back outdoors by the bay and the sky moves too fast to look at, I am crowing with the birds flying with them overhead in the thermals coming off the hot sand on the beach. Gardening again proves welcome relief for the MDA push, exercising muscles I never even knew I had.

T 3:00 2C-I, Yes, there it is. Subtle energetic lift complemented by significant enhancement of visual acuity, a distinctly different phen signature, seems to begin blending well with the effects of the MDMA/MDA combo, with MDA the backbone, MDMA the nervous/sensory extension of the metasystem, and 2C-I providing introspective depth and coloration, the painter of emotions. Another effect of the 2C-I, it made me completely unaware of any somatic side effects usually associated w/ MDxA intake. No nausea, and when the 2C-I became pronounced, no nystagmus or jaw clenching until much later. In fact, the whole trip was very lucid, with no body load, perhaps aided by the L-Dprenyl and Piracetam, no distortions, confusion or fuzzyness.

T 4:00 The sun is bright and the wind high, and by golly, so am I. Gliding my way through the crowded street in a quest for sunglasses, absolutely hopeless given my condition as I don't think they make frames large enough to cover the dilated pupils, becoming aware that everyone's faces had changed.

Peoples' faces became masks, but not color-distorted, morphing and often scary masks of LSD / Psilocybin, rather the faces, or rather the expressions they wore became enhanced to the point that all of the person's life, emotional makeup and baggage, and even self perception, were mixed in proportion and stamped indelibly on their face, right now and at all times.

At this point, the questions begin coming. What is the source of beauty that you seek? - asked the Internal Observer. Subjective Projection is not Objective Perception, or is this even the point? The visuals are becoming stronger.

Emotions people tried to put on, the personalities they tried to project appeared fake and thin, veneer, gloss, like the glossy gray skin-tight T-shirt two sizes too small on an exceedingly muscle-bound bodybuilder who walked by, and made me laugh out loud. Almost as funny as a flock of dreadlocked and carefully cultivated crusty ferals perched on the grassy hill who appeared to be Trustafarians rather than Rastafarians.

On the other hand, some people were stunningly good looking, and in many a case, regardless of their outward physical appearance. When the two, the inward and the outward combined, the synergetic perceptual effect was stunning, it was as if some people were karmically pure and shone with the light of Good Intention, for lack of better words, emanating their pure, beautiful energy, comfortable in their own space and purpose.

This was seemingly much more than typical auras I can read under the influence. When I saw the Soulmate upon returning from the lost crusade, I understood the essence of Love, the pure joy of loving and being loved in return, unconditionally.

T 5:00 Something about the righteous satisfaction of packing the perfect bowl of mull, not too big, not too small, the exhaled smoke is a rainbow cloud, the visuals from the 2C-I are definitely there, with surprisingly few somatic effects still. Pulse 85 -- high by 25, BP 120 / 60, normal.

Another bowl was complemented by a fine cold Belgian lager which went down a treat, as well as helping get rid of the taste of another whole Greenback. Back outside and working away, feeling social as all getout, meeting people right and left, with apparently, no awareness of my changed condition, thank god for the sunglasses which were on my head all along. Conversation is no problem, hardly any distortion, empathic and understanding, attention span is great, and memory recall significantly enhanced, long forgotten references on tap.

T 5:30 Fully tripping, lying on our backs on the grass, all senses enhanced almost to the point of being painful, especially the olfacatory and the visual, the grass recently mown smells of sunshine, every inch of ground seems to be covered with life of some sort awakening under the sun. I can almost feel the plants opening up to the warmth.

The gorgeous, stunning, completely unpretentious Soulmate is feeding me a huge dripping golden mango, I laugh as I suck out the nectar lying on my back, juice and pulp running down my face, taste becoming colored, synaesthesia, here we come. Smells, usually enhanced by L-Deprenyl are magnified immensely, although none bordering on the offensive.

Water divine, definite dehydration after working all day, blisters now burst with top layers of skin gone (remember to wear ya gloves when ya axe, dough!) but while visually amusing and disgusting to others caused no pain ... certainly the awareness of the damage was there, as was the sensation, although it was not perceived as pain, but just that, an awareness of damage.

Nearby is a chicken coop, where we see a rooster, no a Cock consider a few prime chooks then, taking a good running start, jump on top of the fattest looking hen, while others ran away cackling, covering his hapless selection with his flapping wings (tracers) to prevent escape, making mad chicken noises all the while and doing what birds and bees do best, with tenacity and vigour to impress any Viagra salesman -- wow, such raw nature, I look at the Soulmate and she is laughing at me laughing at the chickens and places her body next to mine, her head on my chest.

I feel her warmth and her waist-long hair smells of hay and sunshine and her smell which I love, now in colors, and we want to make love, but there are others, including young'un family members in vicinity; desire a hot knot of white energy at the spine, rising through the lower shakras and spreading through every skin cell, touch is in itself semi-orgasmic.

Eyes closed, her words, spoken gently and not too often, are colored with emotion, I can see both melding into a visual thoughtform, each concept a geometrical figure of fractal complexity, unique as a snowflake, in brilliant hues of primary, yet un-Pantoned colors against a neon pastel background of gently shifting field patterns. Love shines as a tesseract lotus diamond through my whole being.

T 8:00 back home after the sun on its way to meet the ocean becomes obscured by copper-tinged clouds, some cones and music. A shuffle through the CDs scattered everywhere, a few hit and misses, the misses being Sun Ra, some new school Israeli psytrance which proves too aggro, some dub which was too boring, with a Shponglization-Younger Brother a final temporary selection, which when cranked to pleasure levels prompted the poor Soulmate to drive the tired family members back to their abode.

Alone with the music, subs at just before the neighbors come knocking levels, the cat absolutely freaked out jumping off walls, her eyes bigger than mine if possible, escapes to the balcony where she sits indignantly twitching the tip of her tail. The cat hates loud electronic music, she is a classical aficionado though. Oh well, she will have to bear for a bit as next up is a wicked mix of some guitar driven space trance off Guitars on Mushroom, and some Russian psy, which, of course, needs full amplification. Some definite ego expansion noted. Pulse 120 BP 130 / 70 getting higher than I like but within normal range.

Online, reading no problem, music jamming visuals, connection not fast enough to keep up with my clicking, internet bores, reading is not fast enough, some agitation and peripheral amphetaminergic stimulation becoming noted.

T 9:00 Disconnect, a short session of cones, load of laundry, washing dishes proves no respite from the forthcoming Comedown...

Lay back, close eyes and chill to Backroom Beats 2 (Twisted) over another lager. Cat is back, laying on my chest, purring away as I scratch her cheeks. How cool is it to be a cat, with long soft fur, grace, agility, personality. Chilling with the cat, fully grokking as to why the Egyptians of yore chose to deify the feline. Coming down off the pills, the 2C-I still in effect, blood pressure normal but pulse around 140. An energy tremor, not a cramp passes through whole body. I want sex, but she is gone, oh frustration!

T 10:00 Soulmate is back, wonders at my condition, which has apparently become pretty disheveled. Shower brings back memories of being a primordial water creature, feeling the impact of the spray, each drop on my skin.

T 10:30 Just when the massage is blooming to the truly erotic, Glen Gould humming along to his unique Bach fugues on the piano, every cell afire with sensation, friends who were supposed to drop by some hours ago show up. Dough! They knew nothing of my intake, and conversation flowed easy over beers, cones, and for the abstinent ladies, a bit of amaretto on ice.

1mg Alprazolam ingested to ease peripheral tension, and pardon the expression, the priapic puptent in my pants. Pulse is fairly fast still, active visuals calming, mind at full throttle.

T 11:30 Friends dearly depart and a brisk walk outside in the warm night holding hands with the one I love, haloes still around lights and headlights. We walk, sharing our thoughts and revelations of the day, I nuzzle her neck with my shaved head like a big scratchy dog, we kiss under the phosphorescent glow of the cloud-diffused moon and, well, if you know about kissing a loved one, enough said.

T 12:00 Back at home, the cat fed, and Soulmate is falling asleep after an intense day, too tired by this point to respond to amorous innuendos. I follow her to bed after a final nod to Jah Rastafari, and lay curled up next to her luscious naked, warm body, matching my breathing to hers, some CEVs still present, which slowly take the shape of her oncoming dreams.

T 12:30 Thinking there is no way I can fall asleep, I find myself in the midst of a lucid dream, floating, no, flying slowly above an endless lazy blue-green crystal ocean glistening in the breezy tropical sun. The answers to all questions come, realizations yet again, ephemeral yet again.

One remains, of Beauty of Good Intention combined with the Will to Power as the manifestation of a plan of a higher intelligence, and that quintessence of Beauty, regardless of Perception, is Love.

Exp Year: 2003ExpID: 28270
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Nov 9, 2003Views: 60,487
[ View PDF (to print) ] [ View LaTeX (for geeks) ] [ Swap Dark/Light ]
MDA (34), 2C-I (172), Cannabis (1), MDMA (3), Alcohol - Beer/Wine (199) : Various (28), Combinations (3)

COPYRIGHTS: All reports copyright Erowid.
TERMS OF USE: By accessing this page, you agree not to download, analyze, distill, reuse, digest, or feed into any AI-type system the report data without first contacting Erowid Center and receiving written permission.

Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the authors who submit them. Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid Center.

Experience Vaults Index Full List of Substances Search Submit Report User Settings About Main Psychoactive Vaults