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Strange Patterns, Insight, and ... Permanent?
2C-I
Citation:   Real Illusion. "Strange Patterns, Insight, and ... Permanent?: An Experience with 2C-I (exp30003)". Erowid.org. Mar 4, 2008. erowid.org/exp/30003

 
DOSE:
22 mg oral 2C-I
BODY WEIGHT: 140 lb
I am 15 years old. On New Years going from year 2003 to year 2004, I tried 2C-I with mostly just a speedy effect, some thought distortion, things were funnier, and slight visual distortions. It was at a party.

But, 2 days ago I had another much better 2C-I experience. It was in mid january of 2004. Well, I didn't really have much preparation, since I personally believe that on psychedelics you should not only expect the unexpected, but I like to just decide what to do once I start experiencing effects, since I won't really know too much about what the mindstate will be like before then. The set was in my house, my mother and both of my sisters were home, all 3 do not like the fact that I use drugs. But since I was in full control on New Years eve with it, I figured that I should be okay, and if not, then I'll just deal with the consequences. Fortunately, my expectations were correct, they couldn't tell my state of mind was altered in any way.

Keep in mind, this experience might not be in PERFECT order because I do not have perfect memory of it....but it will be good enough for its purpose.

Me and my friend 'Clark' swallowed 22 mg's of 2C-I each around 4 PM. We then watched the movie Blow which is approximately 2 hours long. By the end of the movie we started feeling effects. We went upstairs and played xbox for 15 minutes, and the door kept moving back and forth, then Clark had to go home, unfortunately (he actually said he didn't experience much after he went home). On the ride back to his house, all the lights had a kind of rainbow aura over them, it was very pleasing to look at.

After he went home, my family ordered dinner, I got a salad. I was unable to eat more than 1/2 of it, I was totally full. I had that last time for some reason...I feel totally full. As I was eating my salad, I looked at the floor. The floor tiles were moving back and forth, and waving like waves in the ocean. I was amazed, since this is the first time I ever saw anything like this. This effect went throughout the trip. The negative side effects throughout the trip were a kind of tingling sensation in my legs which was a LITTLE annoying, but not too unpleasant to be considered bad, and I also felt a kind of heartburn or something in my upper chest.

I went downstairs in my basement to go on my computer, and thats where I was for most of the rest of the trip. The wood-patterns on my walls would swirl around and form into faces, it was very interesting, and incredible. I talked to some friends on the internet. Up to this point it may seem like I'm one of those people just taking it to get high, but that's misleading - I care deeply about my spirituality (which is Christian, but I have no sect, and I also was Buddhist last year and I really meditated and stuff ALOT, and I still study Zen as I find it interesting...I'm not the 'average' Christian so to speak) and that's my primary reason for using psychedelics, I simply don't see anything wrong with enjoying the enjoyable effects at the same time. After all, life should be enjoyed if possible...

When on the internet, I talked to my friends very creatively, philosophically, and alot of what I said had spiritual content. I could talk like this if I tried in everyday life, but now it just seemed to flow...from nothing. I didn't think about the words...they simply came. I got alot of insight. For example...what something is, is based on how you percieve it (for example, what a sound sounds like is based on how you percieve the sound, and what the sound is, is what is sounds like), and therefore if you look at something from a different view (percieve it differently), it can change into something very different. Another one had to do with an addiction to masturbation and porn that I'm struggling to break. I thought that if you think about it...the state of mind while masturbating isn't really much more enjoyable than our normal state of consciousness. We just masturbate to fulfill our desire to masturbate, but we don't get any REAL enjoyment out of the experience, at least I dont...its like eating. We eat when we're hungry, but unless we're eating very tasty food, the state of mind while eating isn't much more pleasurable than our normal state of mind. And masturbating will only TEMPORARILY satisfy the desire, but like the Buddha said...the only way to permanantly satisfy a desire is to let go of it. This greatly helped me in my quest to stop masturbating, I have been masturbating MUCH MUCH less. I used to do it 5-8 times a day, today I only did it once. Whenever I think about masturbating, I just think 'its pointless...its no more delightful than our plain state of mind'.

Another interesting insight I got had to do with reality. Last year I came to the realization in Zen that reality is an illusion, but is also a reality. It's an illusion because we see reality as something that's kind of fixed, unchangable. Like as in facts and stuff, but facts are really only opinions accepted by society. It's not an illusion in that its totally fake, but that it's only one way to see the truth, and people see it as the ONLY way. Like, we see the sky as blue. But a dog who's colorblind see's it as gray. It's true to the dog that it's gray, just as much as it's true to us as its blue. Some people will say 'well thats just because the dog doesnt have the capacity to interpret colors such as blue'. Well, there are probably colors that we cant see, and if I remember correctly this is true, so the same will hold true for us in things that we dont interpret the colors 'correctly'. Not only that, we cant even 'prove' anything, since we can't know we aren't on a high dose of a hallucinogen and living another life in another dimension or something, or that we're in a lab in the future connected to a machine that feeds us a reality that is not 'true'. And the concept of reality is based upon the concept that its 'real', but we cant truly know its real.

Alot of the trip I just sat back and watched the visuals because they were so interesting, incredible, and just awesome, while simultaneously thinking about philosophy and spirituality. I started to do my history homework, which was on the renaissance. I was reading about it in my book, and I could just kind of feel like I could totally understand their time. I thought about life back then, what it would be like, it was like I could connect with all the people of their time. I thought it was so interesting, I was just in love with history at the moment. I would read a paragraph, and think about it for 10-20 minutes straight. I never thought schoolwork could be so enjoyable :-)

After I finished my work, I went back online to talk to friends, and one of my friends who talks to me alot about spirituality was amazed at what I was saying, and he was calling me a 'spiritual genius' and stuff, and I would just reply by saying I'm not really any better than anyone else...you may undrestand more, or perform better actions than someone else, but you can't be 'Good'. I also do not believe people can be 'evil'. I believe we are neutral, and that God (which is Love) is the only thing that is Good. By the way..I also got insights into God...like why God (Love) is so powerful. Hate makes you temporarily powerful, since you will destroy that which you do not like, it produces immediate effects, but in the long run it will usually end in destruction, since you will face the consequences of revenge and whatnot. Love on the other hand, works slowly, but in the long run it is far more beneficial, as it CREATES and BUILDS, unlike hate, which will destroy. Hate can create some things, such as weapons, but those are used for destruction, so that kind of cancels out the fact that they had to do with creation. It's kind of a hard concept to understand and it seems like BS at first but if you really think about it for a long time it really shows its truth. It's too bad so few people understand this...the world could be such a better place. The funny thing is, people would achieve their selfish desires better with love and compassion than with hate, but they hate anyway...its like the selfishness blinds them into thinking a path of self destruction will blind them.

I went to bed around 1 AM, while still tripping a little bit. The next day I didn't feel much 'hangover' and I woke up easy. Something very strange though, I could still see things, such as the patterns on wood 'swirl' around, and the tiles would move back and forth and would roll like waves in the ocean. It would vary between 1/4 as strong as it was on the trip and 1/2 as strong, it would change randomly...and over 48 hours later, this still is happening at the same intensity, it hasn't slowed down one bit. I'm wondering if this will last permanantly. If it does, it's not a big deal, it can be a little annoying at times if I'm trying to read and the letters are bobbing around, but its nothing too distracting. It's actually very interesting when I'm bored and I can just watch the patterns on the floor and the wall move around, so I actually kind of enjoy it overall. I'm wondering if anybody else ever experienced anything like this, but I don't think I read it in any of the 2C-I experience reports, and I read around 10 or so.

Overall, I think it was a very good, enjoyable, and spiritually enriching experience.

Exp Year: 2004ExpID: 30003
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Mar 4, 2008Views: 5,191
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2C-I (172) : Sex Discussion (14), Glowing Experiences (4), Alone (16)

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