Citation: Jimmy. "A New Outlook Through Cocaine: An Experience with Cocaine (exp3084)". Erowid.org. Aug 20, 2001. erowid.org/exp/3084
Before I start I should give you some background on myself and my health. I've watched friends consume 8-balls of cocaine in a single night and walk away from it and not think about it for months on end. This, however, might not be the case with you. Although I am *far* from an experienced cocaine user, I do respect the fact that cocaine can KILL you. Remember that, and be safe, not stupid.
To date, as I am writing this, I have done cocaine, give or take, 7 times. I am not addicted to any substance, including tobacco. I have a regular heart beat, very very regular in fact, and no problems with blood pressure. About the only thing that ails me is asthma. Although my asthma used to be quite bad (living with 2 chain smokers and a combination of many animals) it's now very minor; I live in a smoke-free environment.
The first night I tried cocaine was early in the summer of 2000. I was picking up some bulk Ecstasy from one of my dealers. I knew he dealt cocaine, as I was told by one of his good friends (somebody I know a great deal better), but never thought about it too much. I had some extra cash, so I decided to get $20 worth (which to anybody familiar with cocaine, is about .3g, at least where I'm from). He agreed and handed me the Ecstasy-pill sized rock and I left, knowing I was about to head deeper into the drug realm.
I brought it home, and called a friend that I knew was experienced, at least a little, with coke. He came over and I cut the rock into 5 lines. I had 3, he had 2. The instant before I snorted I was pretty scared. I had never really messed with any drugs that could potentially kill me. My heart racing, I snorted it up (I had snorting experiences with ketamine and Ecstasy before), about 10 minutes between lines.
Honestly, I felt pretty ripped-off. All this talk about cocaine and how great it was made me expect more. My friend said he could totally feel it, he said he was feeling great and he seemed to like it as well. I got up and walked around a bit, went outside, came back in. Nothing. I knew I felt different but it was subtle enough to make me ask myself if what I was feeling was merely psychological. Before shunning cocaine, I decided I didn't have enough to really make me feel it the way I should (I know this is incorrect but the second reason should rectify this), and my setting was pretty boring. It was an evening at my house, just me and my friend. Quiet and mundane.
Since then, I have totally changed my opinion on cocaine. Here's why...
The next time I did coke, I bought about the same amount as I did last time. My setting was a lot better, but I still didn't get much enjoyment out of it. Again, I knew something was different but it just wasn't that good.
So finally, a friend asked me if I wanted to get some people over, get a gram of coke, and chill for the night. I agreed, in desperate hopes that maybe this significant amount would make me feel the 'wonders' of cocaine.
That evening (6pm-ish) I dropped about 3 grams of mushrooms. The trip was great. As I was coming down, it was time to dip into the coke. We took turns doing lines all night, about every 30 minutes, and oh my God, it was amazing. My mushrooms were pretty much all gone, I knew that before I started snorting. I had about an hour left before I was totally back to normal and feeling blah-ish like I usually do after mushrooms. After I did the coke, I sat down and a couple friends of mine were having a small argument. I looked at them and all I could think about was 'I know they're arguing and that's negative but holy shit I'm having such a great time just sitting here doing absolutely nothing.' I even said aloud, that I was having a great time. I felt VERY euphoric (more than a typical euphoric coke feeling, obviously because of the mushrooms). What I was feeling was completely textbook material. It just blew me away how great everything was and seemed. I was rushing quite a bit, throughout my entire body. Simply amazing. A bit later my friend and I rolled up a joint with some coke in it and passed it around with a few other people. I was pretty wrecked after that. I was quite pleased with my mental state on cocaine. So clear and fresh, so much self-esteem. The night seemed to unfold with joy and excitement, everything I did and everything people said was completely interesting and caught my undivided attention.
The last time I did coke I snorted an entire gram to myself from about 12pm-12pm the next day. I smoked a coke-laced joint with my roommate. I was just coming off of E when I started the coke. I had a blast. And throughout all this time I've never though 'I want more I want more' or had any cravings for coke at all. in fact I couldn't finish the last 4 or so lines of my original 1.5g, my sinuses were completely raw (I had a pretty tough cold at the time, so I don't really question the purity much). The back of my throat stung like MAD. Basically I got to the point where it hurt more to snort the coke than to get the high. Besides by that time it wasn't that great anymore. I wasn't increasing my dosage so basically my tolerance was taking over each time I did it.
I'm very happy that I have found out just what coke is and how it *actually* affects me. Coke is definitely a mixing drug (of course not EVERY drug :) watch out people, read up before you mix). I think I'd rather START doing coke while I'm high on mush, pot, or a little drunk or at least coming off of any one of them, and just continue with coke. I guess I just feel it wayyyy better than I would otherwise. I'm also quite pleased with the fact that I seem to have no addiction what-so-ever to it, having done it quite a few times in the time span since I've started. Although I'm not saying I won't get addicted, I don't think its anything worth having an addiction for.
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