Citation: Itsuoda. "5-MeO-DiPT As a Tool for Introspection: An Experience with 5-MeO-DiPT (exp3209)". Erowid.org. Dec 3, 2001. erowid.org/exp/3209
I have used 5-MeO-DiPT about 10 times. Half of these were probably good experiences. The other were neutral or bad, with an amplification of background psychological negativity, and/or nausea, and/or generalized anxiety. However, whether the trip was a good or a bad one, the next day, I've always felt very good, both physically and psychologically, like after a good workout.
At the time of this experience, I had been feeling a bit depressed, and decided to do some 5-MeO-DiPT again, knowing full well that it would likely amplify that mood.
9pm 9mg of 5-MeO-DiPT orally in some water. The taste, as terrible as usual.
9:05pm Remembering that I had to return some videos, I head out to the video store.
9:20 First signs of alteration: as I'm checking out another movie, I notice that the array of videos on the wall appear unusually colorful.
9:45 I am back home, and am starting to feel the first twinges of nausea. Only slight. A little anxiety.
10:30 I am fully altered. Shulgin ++. Physical feelings of energy. Predictably, negative/anxious thoughts start welling up. Instead of running from them, as I would usually do, I turn all the lights off, and put my full attention on what is going on inside. I let it all come out. The feelings and issues that emerge take on a tangible physicality. I feel the weight of the negative emotions, the buzzy exhilaration of positive feelings, the physical tension of responsibilities etc etc etc... The observer inside me notices/records these effects, while another part of me is busy experiencing and processing.
12:00 The trip is gradually becoming more and more enjoyable. It seems that the more shit that comes out, the more I become airborne. There haven't been any major cathartic realizations, just a slight deepening of understanding.
1-3am The heavy introspection seems to be over. I am now alive and playing: going on the net, opening books I hadn't looked at in years, writing in my journal, going outside and taking some amazing deep breaths of fresh night air, noticing the liquid beauty of the fog rolling through the beam of a street light. Emotionally open without the ego-aggrandizing aspects typical of mdma. Movement is delicious.
5am (ish) finally able to get some sleep.
10:30am Wake up refreshed and in a very positive mood.
This positive mood has persisted for the last week. I have had no recurrence of the blues. I have a somewhat deeper understanding of some issues that were bringing me down, but nothing ground shattering, and the insights in and of themselves have not changed things much. I ask myself, am I feeling better because I simply experienced the darkness that the 5-MeO-DiPT helped bring up, or did the chemical do a number on my neurochemistry, independently of my experience. I don't know. Either way, I will probably consider it again as a tool for moving myself through dark times.
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