Citation: Viola. "I Think I Was Half Dead: An Experience with Ecstasy (exp3214)". Erowid.org. Oct 10, 2000. erowid.org/exp/3214
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This was so scary. i was looking forward to this party for 4 years and couldn't wait to get on to some good E and dance my @$$ off. I get to the party which was outdoors and -5 degrees celsius outside, and met up with a friend who knew someone with some extra pills to sell. I bought 2 off him and ate them right away. (never take something just because you trust your friends). I was told they were Mitsubishis wich i have done many times. Looking forward to the high i went out searching for my other friends. (the party was 4000+).
Someohow i ended up sitting on a haybale for an hour by myself. not smiling, not knowing whether i was happy or sad or scared or high or straight or disappointed. The longer i sat there trying to sort out my feelings the more lost i got. My buddy found me and asked how my night was going yadda yadda yadda. I just looked at him and said i was lost. When he asked what i meant i almost cried. Then i shook my head and turned away from him, virtually shutting him out of our conversation. I no longer wanted anyone to talk to me but at the same time i wanted all my friends to be with me. Everytime one finally walked by i would smile then hide my face because at last minute i decided i didnt want them around me at all.
Finally i made it to the jungle tent were i sat down and some people from another city hugged me for the next 4 hours and bought me hot chocolate. People were coming up to me and kissing my forehead and giving me water because i looked horrid. My eyes kept rolling back in my head about 5 hours after dosing. Plus i started to get a white cloud floating in front of my eyes. I felt as if i was watching everything but not actually a part of it. I felt that i could never be a part of it and that somehow everyone was different and did not want me to be there (except for the people hugging me.) once people approached me i then believed that they were happy unlike all the others. I didn't move for 4 hours in total. I don't know if thats because i was cold, scared or sketching out. I can't honestly say i knew if i was coming or going. I Finally stood up and danced at 8am. (8 hours after dosing) This is when the e kicked in for about 2 hours.
After i got home i just became dead to the world for the next 3 days. I barely spoke or moved. I had a lot of inner turmoil and had a hard time dealing with every little emotion.
i did have some other visuals like when i looked at my glowstick. But since i did not know what i was on at the time and was panicking i preferred to watch people dance and concentrate on not having any visuals since i do not take drugs which cause hallucinations so this made my experience quite a bit more frightening.
I may try it again now that i know what to expect but i recommend people do not take their friends word when it comes to drugs. Sometimes they dont even know for sure that what your taking is what you wanted.
Do drugs. Dont let them do you. Stay educated.
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