DOSE:

1 tablet

oral

MDMA

(pill / tablet)

BODY WEIGHT:

130 lb

It was the day. The day i had been waiting for all year long. It was New Years Eve 2000. After the y2k scare ruined my last new years experience I was determined to ring in 2001 in style. There was a massive rave that night and I was determined to go to it. After twisting the truth a little, I was granted permission to go from my parents. I had purchased an ecstasy pill (White Octagon) 2 weeks earlier and was planning to drop it, traditionally, at the rave. I had been taking multi vitamins, ginko biloba, DMAE, and antioxidants daily before that night. Also, I preloaded 200mg of 5-htp the night before. The last time I had dropped was 2 weeks before. This would be my second rave, and my third time dropping now, and by far, the best experience yet.

I and two of my friends arrived at the venue at around 5:50pm, gates were opening in 10 minutes. We rendezvous'd with the rest of our friends in line, two guys, and two girls. The two guys were friends but the girls were only acquaintances, and one of the girls was a major factor to me that night.

We got into the venue around 7:30 pm and I was overwhelmed by the size of it. We walked around to get the layout of the entire venue. I was immersed in absolute good vibes and revelry. Everywhere we went, there smiles, laughter and occasional cheers. I had never been in such a positive enviroment.

After covering the venue we found a spot to set up 'home base'. I was still sober at this time and proceeded to dance for a bit. Then one of my friends suggested we go around giving out lightshows, and so we did. After a few lightshows we came across a group of girls who we also gave lightshows to. They were extremely grateful and so we chilled with them for a bit. My homey took interest in one of the girls and proceeded to advance on her, he was sober the time as well. We felt like we found our 'E buddies' for the night so we decided to move home base next to the group of girls. While my friend went to retrieve the rest of our group, I passed out some of my bracelets to the girls. I was still sober at this time, but I'm a generous person anyway. The rest of my Friends arrive at our location and my friend continued to advance on that girl. Her friends caught attention of this and were constantly keeping an eye on him. I was informed that we would be dropping at 10:00 pm, so I went to get some water. 10:00 pm rolled by and we dropped. After we dropped, the group of girls informed us that they were going to the house area and would be back in an hour. They never came back. My friend was optimistic about it saying, 'maybe she forgot'. I on the other hand wasn't so optimistic saying, 'her friends took her away from you'. Whatever happened, we'll never know. Anyway, I kept myself occupied giving out lightshows while I waited for the E to kick in. I am sensitive to MDMA and is usually the first to roll. Around 26 minutes after ingestion, I got my first alert, the buzzing tingly, radiating energy feeling. We headed back to home base where I lied down and prepared for takeoff. I was climbing rapidly, but it wasn't as intense as the last time I rolled. The bass on the ground felt wonderful. The rhythmic vibrations of the music massaged every square inch of my body. I was writhing in pleasure but I still wasn't at the peak. I looked at my watch everytime I felt a change in my roll, and for some reason, I looked at my watch in 1 minute, 5 minute, and 10 minute intervals, and it was always 1, 5, or 10 minutes exactly.

At 10:36pm, I was at my peak. My eyes were fluttering wildly and i was chewing on my pacifier like a cow. Both of the girls that came with us were rolling as well. So we all got together and cuddled and ran our hands all over each others bodies. I kept gently kissing the one girl I mentioned earlier (I'll refer to her as Love) on the shoulder. She took attention to that and asked me if I liked kissing her. I told her 'yeah, cuz yer skin is so soft'. Sooner or later I found my tounge in her mouth. The peak was never a verbal moment for me, it seems like only the pleasure is existent and everything else is just blocked off.

After 20 minutes of plateau, my roll dropped. My roll was gonna be a roller coaster. That is, it would go up and down and up and down. I had experienced this with my first time which was with a different pill (Green Clover) but I had the same pill now as I did with my second time rolling and my second time was a smooth roll. A few minutes after my roll dropped, Love's roll dropped as well. I took the time of this temporary depression in my roll to carry on a conversation with her. Without the rushes of pleasure clouding my mind, I could speak coherently. I have seen Love around and was introduced to her long before the rave, but I never had a chance to get to know her. Now I had my chance, and I took advantage of it. We had a really deep and meaningful conversation (at least, to me it was deep and meaningful). She had broken up with her boyfriend two weeks ago and was kinda cautious about the things I was saying. She kept saying, 'yer only saying that cuz yer rolling' which is partially true. Ordinarily I would keep such things inside but when I'm rolling I just pour my heart out. I'm not like those people who let the Ecstasy generate false positivity, I say exactly what I'm feeling at the time without sugar coating it or twisting the truth. I tried to reassure her I was being sincere but she kept a doubt in her mind. We still got closer that night though. It always seems like everytime I go raving I have a girlfriend for just that night. I guees we just have to get our feelings straightened out and see what happens.

About half an hour later, both of our rolls came back, not as intense though. We gave each other massages and kissed again. This time it lasted only half as long. Everytime my roll would come back it would last shorter and shorter till it just burned out. Sooner or later, midnight rolled around and everyone was getting all hyped up about the new year. There was even a fireworks show to mark the occassion, but I could care less because all my attention was focused on Love. She felt sorry that she was keeping me from celebrating the new year but I reassured her that I wouldn't have it any other way. I felt so obligated to seeing to her well being. I spent the remainder of the fireworks show lying on the ground holding her. Then she did something I didn't expect from her, she took my hand and held it. It felt like some wonderful dream at that moment, I felt more complete than I ever have in my whole life. Her mere touch provided me with more happiness than my ex girlfriends could ever give. It felt like the realest thing I could ever have, but I knew better, as soon as the night was over, this moment would be just a dream, as it was with the last time I went raving.

I continued to care for her through the night. I gave her my jacket when she felt cold and made sure she was always warm. I was completely back to baseline by 2:03am. One of my friends had sobered up before me abut he was very tired at the time. I took the time after my roll to care for the rest of my friends. I felt so close to everyone. After I made sure everyone was alright, I let them know I was going to go get them some water. I came back with the water and made sure everyone including myself was hydrated. One of my favorite djs was spinning in the jungle room at 2:30 but 1 of my friends was still rolling so I took care of him till he came down. At 3:30 he was stable enough to walk and another dj I liked was up in the jungle area. So I informed Love and everyone else that I was going to the jungle room. I took my friend who just came down with me. We got to the jungle room and I danced and battled. I felt like I was at my prime. I gained acclamation for my performance in dancing. I felt little surges of energy still flowing thru my body. When I danced, I felt like I was so fluid and smooth. All my muscles were loose and relaxed. However, I had extreme cottonmouth and my jaw and tounge were sore. After the dj finished his set we headed back to our home base.

On the way back, I saw something quite disturbing. There was a guy alone by himself slumped against the wall who didn't appear to be breathing. I felt like I needed to check on him but I was afraid to be the one who finds out if he's dead or not. My friend suggested that maybe he was in a K hole. But then I explained to him that K doesnt suppress yer breathing like that. All I could do was just pray for that guy.

We continued on our way and had a conversation drawing parallels between the rave and tribal villages and the olympics. We bought more water to combat the cottonmouth. The cold water felt kinda painful on my sore tounge and I had a hard time drinking. We saved some water for the rest of the group and headed back. When we got back, most of them were asleep including Love. I noticed that those of us who had preloaded were still awake, and those who didn't were asleep. I woke them up and distributed water to each one. Love's hands were cold so I tried my best to keep them warm. I still felt like she needed me, although she seemed kinda withdrawn and distant. I asked her what was wrong and she explained that she was just tired. I still felt attracted to her but I also felt that she needed some room. So i just made sure that she was warm and hydrated for the rest of the night.

We left the rave an hour before it ended. Love and I walked separate from each other on the way to our cars. Just like the last time, the dream was over. My friend offered to drive me to my car. In the car Love just fell asleep till I got to my car, when I was about to leave, she said, 'you better call me' and I was like 'I dont have your number' so we exchanged numbers and she told me that we need to do this again. I smiled and gave her a hug and bid her farewell.

Ont the way home, it honestly felt like a dream, like the memory was there but the experience was distant. Two nights ago seemed like a vacation from reality.

Also on the way home on the way home we hit a dead dog on the freeway. I felt sad for the dog before I was concerned for the condition of my car. I still had a glowing ember of empathy in my heart and I put material things aside. I was more concerned with life at this time. Then I got this idea that the dog was an omen that we had just left happiness and were now returning to the suffering of reality. We decided to stop by our friends house where they had a drinking party for new years. We spent a couple of hours describing our night then fell asleep. I only slept for two hours then was awake the rest of the day.

I noticed that my heart was still pounding strongly. So strong that my chair would be bobbing as I reclined in it. I was feeling very nostalgic about the night which had passed and I shared the highlights with everyone. I also listened to their highlights from their night as well. I kicked it with them for the rest of the day. I felt so connected to all my friends, even though they weren't at the rave. I kept telling them how I wish they were there. Around 7:00pm the next night, I headed home.

When I got home, I found out from the news that three people got stabbed at the rave I was at. It's weird, it seemed like the night was perfect for me, like I was in my own world, and everyone around me seemed to share my sentiment. However, in another part of the event, hatred ran loose. I guess theres always gotta be one rotten apple in the bunch, but it's good to know the majority is sweet.

I completed the experience with a pleasant slumber.

Exp Year: 2001	ExpID: 4491
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Feb 14, 2001	Views: 4,496
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MDMA (3) : Rave / Dance Event (18), Glowing Experiences (4)