Citation: TurboTheyCallMe. "My Story: An Experience with Amphetamines (Adderall) (exp47770)". Erowid.org. Feb 1, 2008. erowid.org/exp/47770
Before I tell my story, let me indicate a few key things about me BEFORE I started taking aderall:
-5'7 in height
-135lbs in weight
-16 Years Old
-Typical teenage male, physically active and sexually thriving
-Outgoing and enthusiastic in nature
-Never done drugs except for pot once or twice
Not but a few days after the first day of school, a friend of mine (quite an active drug user) offered me a 25mg capsule of Aderall XR. Uninterested at the time, I simply took the pill with me, not caring to dose. It ended up in the hand of a pill-popper in exchange for her pizza.
Realizing I was a bit afraid of what would happen if I took it, I procrastinated taking the pill she gave me the next day just as I had the day before. After pondering the idea all morning, I decided to go for it at lunch. *Swallows pill with a gulp of milk* After lunch, I went back to class and back to having my head on the desk. I'm a very sleepy person in school...Well...Was. Completely forgetting about the pill, I perked up and decided to do some work. This event placed the first thought in my head, 'Hmm, that's odd. I never do work.'
After 3rd block (English), I headed to 4th block (Algebra 2). I HATE(D) math. As linguistically advanced as I am, I've never been a numbers person. Upon arrival to math class, I felt awake and ready to work, yet I had not given credit to the pill for this. I proceeded to do my math work, LIKE A LUNATIC. I was doing so much work I could have been doing two separate equations with each hand at incredible speeds. And, to my surprise, I UNDERSTOOD IT!! One glance at the example, and I had the whole assignment done in minutes.
That's when the thought hit me: 'Oh my God. I LOVE math! Wait, that's not normal. Holy shit I feel great! Wow I can't wait to tell Michael how great I feel after school!' Michael is my best friend, he goes to and from school with me. I knew it had hit me, I felt incredible, and was working more efficiently than I had ever in my entire life. Later I found out the feeling of 'incredibleness', if you will, is called euphoria. And it was STRONNNGGG! I couldn't stop talking to my peers. I wanted to give everyone a hug, I wanted to smile endlessly, everything felt so great. I was in the best mood in my life, that fact stands today. Unfortunately it was a completely synthetic feeling.
I left school, excited with this incredible feeling of over-whelming joy, which could be rooted to no other event but the dosing on 25mg of Aderall XR at lunch. Once I got in my car with Michael, I couldn't stop telling him how great I felt. Following the initial description of the effects, I would just say 'Oh my god. It keeps going and going.' The euphoria rolled inside me non-stop to the point where I had no vocabulary to describe it.
Michael and I then went to go get a snack at a near-by Store, where I picked up a Monster Energy drink. Let me just say, WOW!! Aderall + Energy drink definitely triggers something. It brought on an intense reverb of euphoria. Michael and I actually recorded that day when he was with me, and I have the tape lying around somewhere. All I could do was smile at the camera, disoriented and in shock at my own status. I then dropped Michael off at his house, giving him some useful advice about his situation with a girl. Hah...here's what I said:
'Man. Man just don't sweat it. Roll with it man, just do what feels right! Just ridddeeee, let it happen, it'll be okay! Yeahhh. Just laugh the whole time, rise or fall.'
On the way home, by myself, I found myself talking to myself non-stop about incredible insights and self-revelations. That day I told myself the deepest secrets about myself and how I should live. I learned so much that day. It was as if idle thoughts had been unlocked, awakened. When I got home, I had an hour long conversation with my mom, about how I was going to turn my life around. I was going to be successful! That was one of the best talks I've had with my mom. I told her this was brought on by religion, in reality it was Aderall.
I spent the rest of the day talking to my friend Ashley (gave me the Aderall) about my condition. We agreed on so many things, she knew exactly how I felt, even though Aderall never really had affected her that way. After that, I spent hours just walking around the house staring blankly into the walls, amazed at what I felt. Not once did I stop talking, even while alone. My mental limits were shattered and I reached new heights of self-awareness, universal awareness even.
The come down brought on sadness and a feeling of loss, I could not wait to redose the next day. Off to bed. I didn't sleep a god damn wink.
Here's a timeline of Aderall's influence on that day:
12:30AM- Took a 25mg dose
1:30PM- It kicked in
2:00PM- The effects became apparent to me
3:00PM- I reached my peak and was level for hours
6:00PM- I felt I was coming down
7:00PM- I noticed I was gradually coming down. Euphoria had dissipated, had a body buzz of sorts
1:00AM- I was down...
I felt I was addicted psychologically from the first time, so I continued to take 25mg doses every school day. I usually dosed around 7:30 AM and felt the comedown...Never. For the sheer reason that I was asleep when that happened because of the Benedryl I took before bed, which I am now dependant on thanks to Aderall.
Short-term tolerance was apparent. Mondays were the best, Fridays held little Euphoric effects. Sober weekends were a piece of cake, I had no problem being off the drug (yet). Slowly the feelings of Euphoria dissapeared, at this point I upped my dosage to 50mg (Two 25mg capsules). After this habit continued for months, I upped my dosage again to 60mg, certain days I took 75mg to 90mg depending on what was available to me. The euphoric side-effect no longer seemed to work after a while. I only felt it briefly after the onset and after that the drug just functioned for what it was meant for (increased focus/productivity). Sober weekends ARE hell. I can't stop sleeping, eating, being horny (I forgot to mention, Aderall abolishes all and any interest in sex). The fatigue is awful, I sleep days at a time.
So here's my situation today. It's been about 3 months since my first dose, and I have not quit. I usually have a steady flow of it, but Ashley's prescription is dry right now. I haven't gone to school sober since the first couple days of school, and I cannot stand it. I check out or don't even go I feel so bad. My grades will plummet from their honor roll status if I can't get aderall soon. God I can't wait, I need it just so I can be awake. I don't even get euphoric any more, even after a week of not using it. I've also noticed that I am depressed a lot now for no reason during what should be my peak during aderall influence. I feel awful on it and off it, but I need it. I'm addicted, and I don't care to stop. The pros balanace the cons, AS OF NOW. I plan to quit this Summer, the only reason I use it now is for school.
Here are some basic things about me now after all this aderall use:
-5'8 in height
-120lbs in weight (I lost 15 pounds from the anorexia side-effect, and to think I was skinny before.)
-Nearly 17 Years Old
-Little to no exercise, no sexual interest
-I've become shy and slightly depressed
-All I can think about is how I'll get some more pills
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