Citation: Nikki. "It Happened So Fast: An Experience with Cocaine (exp53648)". Erowid.org. Nov 7, 2008. erowid.org/exp/53648
||(powder / crystals)
So, I've done blow since I was about 16. Very random. Months apart. Just at parties and shit cause I was a teenager and it seemed like the right thing to do. But my friend just got home from college, so we were in celebratory mood and before you know it, we've been doing blow everyday for about 3 weeks now. Some days it's a line before work and that's it, some days it's a balls out tweakerpad crazycracktivity night where we don't sleep until 10am. Evens out pretty well.
**It also should be noted that we got this batch from the same guy we always do. He is a very trusted source. Also, after the first line of this bag we noted that it was better than the stuff we'd been getting. It seemed like a cleaner high. A more social high, less physical. It felt good, not cracked out beyond control. We were very happy with our purchase from the first line of the evening.**
This crazy 'episode' happened just the other night. I am very neurotic, and obviously moreso when spun out, so I write down all the times I do my lines and the sizes. I had done 9 lines in 5 1/2 hours, which was the most I had done in a small time in quite some time, if not ever. I started at 10:16 and it is 3:46 when I take my last line. I feel way up. CRAZY up. 'Too up', I say to my friend next to me. I have never been 'too up.' It is now an hour after my last line, but I cannot possibly fathom doing more. I get up to pee. Pee FOREVER. I think to myself I am draining the life out of my body, and chuckle a bit. Sit back down next to friend. It is 4:50am.
It hits so sudden. My chest goes ice cold from the inside out, it is spreading outwards and my face is tingling very unpleasantly. I am in tunnel vision and my hearing is muffled. I turn to her, 'I feel weird.' It worsens. I stand up again to try to change something, anything. My pulse is racing, I'm sweating. I'm trying to breath slowly, calm myself down. My chest is so COLD. My friend brings me water, is asking what to do, how to help. I dunno I dunno. I stand up and slowly walk, trying to focus on breathing and small, even steps. Things are very hot, very fast. She suggests to go outside for cold air. I go outside and instantly get dizzy, I start to blackout. NO GODDAMNIT. NO. I AM NOT FUCKING DYING NOW GODDAMNIT NO. I go and stumble inside and sit on the couch, refusing to let my knees buckle or my eyes close even for a second.
This is where it gets weird. Those are all exact symptoms of an OD, yes? Well than what the fuck about THIS?:
It is a sudden and complete 180 change. My feet, legs, hands, arms all go numb. I take my pulse. It is slow. Slower than it has ever been. It has now gone from 3 beats per second to one beat every 2 seconds. I turn to my friend, who is trying to stay calm but doesn't know what the hell to do, and tell her to take my pulse while demanding 'WHY IS IT SO SLOW? WHY IS IT STOPPING?' 'I.... I don't know...I dunno.' My face is drained. I literally feel the life drain out of my face, while watching her watch my face change from color to completely gray. She looks horrified. 'What? Am I pale?'
'...yeah....um.....you are.' My ears are ringing. 'IT'S CAUSE I AM DYING. THAT IS LIFE LEAVING MY BODY.' 'What do you want me to do?' I tell her to go online and research what the fuck OD symptoms are and what to do. We know the symptoms, but this is not right. This isn't textbook symptoms. I start hitting my face as hard as I can. I start smacking my chest as if to jumpstart my heart. Moving my limbs around like crazy trying to get some sort of feeling, some blood flow, anything into my body. Running and jumping around. BEATING my chest full force. ANYTHING to keep my heart beating. I look like a crazy Tarzan on coke.
It starts gradually. But I start to feel a bit more up to speed. Not too fast, but a bit more normal. My chest is still cold and my face is tingly, but I am not nearly going through whatever it was I just was in. I ate some string cheese and a piece of bread. Drank some OJ. Started to be okay. Not good. But okay. It came back 2 times in the next 2 hours, in much smaller doses, and my heartbeat never slowed down as much as it did before. I felt a cold chest and a tingly body and numb limbs and dizziness for a few more hours though. I was scared to go to sleep, scared my heartbeat would slow down again, and eventually stop.
I cannot for the (dwindling) life of me stress how fast it all happened. I kept telling my friend, in case she had to talk to a paramedic or something, 'This is all happening VERY FAST. Faster than I can possibly communicate to you. I am narrating what is happening after the fact cause it is going through my body so fast!!!' It was definitely one of those, 'Oh my God is this ACTUALLY happening? This only happens to people on movies' kinda moments. Very Saved by the Bell.
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