Citation: Laur. "Welcome to My New Life: An Experience with Cocaine (exp54329)". Erowid.org. Apr 4, 2018. erowid.org/exp/54329
||(powder / crystals)
I first started using blow regularly about 2 months ago. I had experimented with weed, shrooms, ecstasy and LSD before.
At first I only bought smaller bags. I generally stayed in the .50-.70 range for the first month and found that each bag lasted about 3 days. Last month, I found myself with a large sum of money, and immeadiatly called up my dealer and purchased an 8-ball. Once I got it that night, I was finished with it the next evening. Yes, I even had time to sleep for a few hours before I continued my binging.
Cocaine has consumed my life. I love it, it's so much fun...it makes me feel like god. The comedown is the worst though...I just want more and more...and the more I buy, the more careless I am with it, and the longer I allow myself to continue the binge. And cocaine is such an easy drug to do in public, sneak into a bathroom, my bedroom, at the beach, school, work, wherever. During these binges I hate being in social settings and I become extremely paranoid, always sitting in silence listening for footsteps of someone coming to my door. I'm extremely jumpy...don't walk up behind me anymore unless you wanna earfull.
Sometimes, when I do too much too quickly I get terrible chest pains. My jaw/neck ache, signs of heart attack, and I just sit and wait it out. They say a heart attack can occur up to an hour to two hours after usage, so once that time is up, I don't think I'm going to die anymore, the fear subsides, and break out a few more lines. All my money goes toward it too, my social life is suffering because I don't have the money to hang out with my friends and do what normal college kids do. It's sad, that I have chosen to curl up with my drug and void out the outside world.
This won't go on forever...but until forever ends...it's my life.
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