Citation: Regretful. "Permanently Damaging: An Experience with Clonazepam (exp56276)". Erowid.org. Sep 24, 2018. erowid.org/exp/56276
At the time I was prescribed Klonopin, I'd had pretty profound problems with anxiety for some years. While by no means debilitating-- I was still able to excel in college, and all that jazz-- it made me extremely unhappy. Having been on many other psychiatric drugs with no effect, it was decided to put me on something more powerful, hence, a benzodiazapine.
I started out at .5mg daily. I remember feeling differently, the feeling was negative, though I didn't realize it at the time. Eventually, as planned, the dose was upped to 1mg/day. For awhile, nothing happened. Then, I had a rather negative event with a girl I was interested in. As a result of the klonopin, I completely broke down in front of her-- not exactly something that happens to me very much. Or, to be specific, something that just doesn't happen to me at all. Anyway, that wasn't the important part, the big part of the whole experience was that it triggered some pretty nasty depression.
It was downhill from there. My energy level plummeted, and I felt depression such as I had never felt before. Eventually, I felt like I'd just had it with life and didn't want to go on. Obviously, I mentioned this to my doctor and I was cycled off of the medication.
Unfortunately, the departure of the Klonopin from my system did not remove the suicidality. While reduced, it was still there, and would stay with me for quite a few years (though not seriously so, it was just a voice in the back of my head). Very unpleasant. I also have suspicions that it might have triggered me onto a minor bipolar cycle, as my depression-- which I had also lived with for years-- became very different, and much worse.
In short, my opinion is that this drug just isn't worth it, at least for me. At best, it's a very temporary (half life average 36 hours) escape from anxiety--- no different from turning to street drugs or alcohol for salvation. At worst, it can make me extremely depressed. On top, it can be highly addictive for some individuals, and there have been cases of patients requiring rehab to separate themselves from Klonopin. Why this drug is used so liberally in our psychiatric system is beyond me.
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