Citation: Peachy. "Projected Karma: An Experience with H.B. Woodrose (exp56387)". Erowid.org. Oct 20, 2006. erowid.org/exp/56387
This is a report of my third experience with LSA extracted from Baby Woodrose seeds and my sisterís first. I began using Baby Woodrose seeds as a substitute for my beloved LSD, which is hard to find these days, especially since I moved 2 years ago and donít have good connections here. I have found LSA to be as deep and interesting as LSD but with a slightly different focus, more introspective and personal in many ways.
My sister is four years younger than me (she is 21) and had only began experimenting with drugs beyond pot about 2 years prior to this experience. When I learned of her extracurricular activities, I suggested we trip together and she agreed but we couldnít agree on a substance. She liked mushrooms and was scared to try LSD. I love LSD but have never enjoyed mushrooms. For some reason they tend to make me feel extremely vulnerable and confused.
Since we live on opposite ends of the country, we gave up on tripping together for a while. But when she came to visit me a few weeks ago I decided to see if she would be up for LSA. I proceeded to crush up 9 seeds for each of us and place them in 1 cup jars. I filled the jars with distilled water and left them to sit in a cabinet until she arrived. This simple extraction method seems to negate much of the infamous nausea that many people experience with woodrose seeds. I have not used distilled water before but I had heard that it prevents the loss of LSA. The end result was stronger than previous attempts, but I also soaked longer this time so Iím not sure if the distilled water made any difference.
When my sister arrived we discussed it and she agreed so we set the date. The date we chose allowed for an eight day extraction Ė a record for me. Fast forward three days to the evening we chose to trip. I strained the liquid through a fine mesh (very fine Ė I use it to press grains for home brewing) discarded the seed mush and microwaved both tea mugs. LSA extract is less disgusting hot.
We sip the tea slowly (it seems to get worse as you drink it) and begin to feel the effects before we have even completed the mugs. It begins as a tightening in the stomach. Like that feeling you get as the roller coaster begins to descend. The TV begins to look brighter and more interesting. My sister complains that her stomach feels weird and eats some popcorn to settle it. She says it worked. We both find ourselves shifting positions constantly. I am not uncomfortable but I have so much energy.
My sister decides she wants to do my nails. We bought nail kits earlier that day which have special buffer pads to smooth the nail surface and another to give it shine. She quickly becomes totally absorbed in buffing my nails. I find the sensation of pressure on my nail very odd. Not good or bad, just strange and very prominent. I notice that my stomach feels normal now. The queasiness lasted all of 20 minutes. I find I can concentrate on many things at once , the star trek episode on TV, the things my sister is saying, and my own train of thought all at once.
I start to laugh too long and too hard at minor comedies. Sometimes I laugh for no reason. My sister laughs too but at me as much as at the joke. Though smiling and laughing she is more serious than me. And totally focused on completing the nail job. Towards the end I begin to get to antsy. I need to do something. I canít sit still. Though LSA is supposedly a sedative I find it energizes me more than LSD even. I suggest we go swimming and my sister is all for it but she MUST complete the nails first. I am so excited to swim I force her to finish while I change with my other hand.
Soon we are out the door and walking to the apartment pool. Luckily it was totally deserted. The feel of the cool water on my skin felt amazingly refreshing. My sister gets in more timidly and looks stiff. I ask how sheís feeling and she says tense. We talk and she loosens up in a few minutes. The sky and the water are beautiful. The nighttime clouds look like a deep purple and seem to sway. The water is amazingly blue. This is the height of visual effects for me. Interestingly, LSA visuals are more like shroom visuals than LSD visuals (for me anyway). The distortions are more about color and breathing, while LSD is more patterns and melting.
We had been watching star trek DVDs a lot the last few days (we both LOVE the show) and topic of an old board game came up. We had owned it as children and played it all the time. There was a video tape that came with it and was necessary to play the game. Eventually we lost the tape. We searched many times but to no avail. My sister expressed a desire to have that game again, so that we could play it.
After we lost the tape and gave up, our parents had a garage sale and we sold the game, minus the tape. I know this sounds silly, but I have thought back to that day many times in the intervening years. I felt bad for selling the game in itís unusable state. Deliberate fraud, especially one that hurts others at no gain to me (I never saw the money) is totally contradictory to my sense of morality. I have thought that the children who bought it where probably as excited about as my sister and I where when we bought it. And they must have been very disappointed.
I told all this to my sister. And it felt great. I felt like something I had been carrying around for years was off my chest. My sister told me we felt bad about it at the time, and we sold it because our parents told us to. This detail I had totally forgotten. And it redeemed me. Certainly, I should have told my parents it wasnít whole. Itís still my bad karma. But the fact that I didnít do it vindictively, that I wasnít sadistic to some degree, helped to restore my sense of self as a good and moral person.
Then I remembered something else. Years after we sold the game, when I was packing for a move, I found the tape. At the time it just made me feel worse about what I had done. But now I saw it in a new light. It was my karma. I learned a karmic lesson by finding the tape again. I read once that karma is simply a consequence of an action. The consequence of my selling the game when it was useless, was to receive the tape without the game, making the tape useless. This cathartic revelation elated me and made me feel carefree. One less karmic lesson to worry about. And I finally felt like I understand what karma is.
As we swim back and forth we discussed a variety of topics but one that got us both going for awhile was scientific factoids. She is a biology major and I am a grad student in physics so we have a lot to share. This info, fascinating in itís own right, was downright awesome. I felt utterly amazed at the tidbits that she feed my imagination with. And I rediscovered the things I knew, learning them again with the wonder of a child. One of the many facts we discussed was a study done in mice that found that mice fed the meat of mice that had been though a given maze actually got through it faster their first time. I mean, the implications! We spent around an hour prancing around the pool wrapped up in our convo.
Then two of my neighbor friends walked out to the pool to say hello, along with my husband who was sober. I felt strange because my neighbors are not the psychedelic type. Though they drink a lot of beer. After a few uncomfortable moments I simply asked if they were comfortable with our state of mind and they said it was fine. I felt much better. We swam a bit more and talked with the newcomers until we decided we had to get out to pee. On the way back to the apartment I notice that sandals feel totally strange and went barefoot. The sidewalk felt great. My sister told me she didnít want to go back out cause she barely knew my friends and was tripping after all, so we dried off and sat down to some more star trek.
My husband came in and made fun of something my sister said and that made me feel icky and mad. I was about to have the second revelation of the night. I thought about how he often communicates through verbal jabs which are meant in jest, but can feel harsh at times. I begin to realize that I do this too. I can think of at least two times that I have accidental offended someone with my sarcastic tone.
I look over at my sister who seems happy to lay back and watch star trek. I have felt frustrated this visit that she seems to consider many of the activities I planned second to watching as many of the voyager episodes she can while here. I see in her my own laziness and tendency towards obsession. When I buy a video game I play for 5 hours a day for the first week.
The connection between these thoughts suddenly pops out at me. Jungian projection. The things that irritate me about the ones I love are the things I hate about myself. I have always acknowledged that projection occurs and that it must play a role in my own perceptions but never before have I considered what I project and onto whom. I feel that a whole new way of analyzing my self has been discovered. Armed with this new tool I can see into unexplored areas of my psyche. The possibilities are nearly limitless.
This is all seen with a touch of sadness of course. I am confronting parts of my shadow self and that is unnerving. I stare at the TV but Iím not really watching. I need to be with my thoughts right now and this is a way of avoiding conversation with my sister. Soon she falls asleep. I lay back and breathe. I notice the fullness of my breaths. I find that on psychedelics I breath like a yogi. Deep and full. Equal inhale and exhale. It tends to feel speedy almost, taking deep breaths. Like Iím taking in too much life energy to handle. After perhaps another hour I finally felt tired and went to bed.
I wake the next morning refreshed. My sister shows no ill effects either. Since then I have read further on the conceptions of projection and the shadow self and continue to learn. This trip really solidified in my mind the place of LSA in my psychedelic toolbox. While LSD shows me connections that bring me closer to an understanding of the world around me, LSA shows me connections that bring me closer to an understanding of my place in the world.
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