Citation: TheTele. "A Complete Understanding of Nothing: An Experience with Cannabis (exp56554)". Erowid.org. Dec 26, 2009. erowid.org/exp/56554
My first experience with marijuana was with the guys in the apartment above me. I knew them all very well, so one evening they were like, if you want to try smoking, here's a bong full. After going my whole life without having tried it, I figured once couldn't hurt.
And it didn't. This first time was nice. I was comfortable, sitting on a couch, watching Da Ali G show, eating chips. So I figured, hey, why not, this stuff is fun. I'm not worried about the consequences, as I live in a College environment, where it is practically expected, so I might as well keep using it.
The second time I tried, I was at my friend D's house. It was already a sort of eerie evening, as the walk over it was pouring rain. I did not know anyone else in the room but D, so just the setting was a bit uncomfortable. One of his friends was rolling a blunt, which I proceeded to take 4 massive hits off of. I felt nothing for the first 10 minutes, as I was sitting there watching TV. I started slowly noticing the effects taking place, similar to those of the first time. But after about another 10 minutes I felt a very strange pull on my body towards the TV. And before I knew it, I felt as if I was watching the TV in person. Everything that was on the TV seemed like it was right in front of me. Everyone else in the room was gone.
I am not sure how long it was after this happened, but my friend D asked if I wanted anything to drink. I snapped out of the TV vision for a bit and got up and walked to the kitchen. When I was in the kitchen, I could not pour water out of the Brita, and quickly noticed how unable I was to function. I took a big gulp of water expecting it to help, but instead I felt like I was having a minor panic attack. I do think this was more mental than anything. I went to the bathroom to splash some water on my face to maybe bring myself down. While I was in the bathroom, I quickly found myself in pure fear looking at my face in the mirror. I felt like this was both the first and last time I was ever going to truly SEE myself. I found myself praying to God to bring me down off this horrible drug. While I am a fairly religious person, I found myself believing in God more than ever at this moment, as I was fearing perhaps I was going to die.
I was able to regain focus for short periods of time to remind myself I was going to be ok, but these would quickly disappear. My friend D knocked at the door, and asked if I was ok. I was able to bring myself together and tell him I needed to go home. I feel like this would have all been fine had I just sat down and let him talk me down a bit, as I am willing to bet 99.9% of this panic attack was mental, and could have easily been brought under control.
On the walk home, I found myself seeing INSIDE myself. As if I could see inside my head looking out. It was a very bizzare visual that would occur every time I closed my eyes. When I finally got home and laid down, I could not lie on my stomach, because when I did I would have my face pressed against a pillow causing more of these CEVs. For about an hour I debated calling somebody. I was thinking about calling my mom. I thought about calling 911. It was a very frightening feeling. After a few hours, I must have fallen asleep, as I woke up the next morning, still very high. Although now I felt much better, and realized that the effects had faded, making me realize I was going to be fine within the next few hours.
I laid on the couch for the rest of the day, watching TV, taking short naps, and at around 6 that night, I felt completley fine again. I have smoked periodically since then, but haven't experienced the same intensity as that second smoke.
While I do not think smoking weed is necessarily wrong, I find it to be much more powerful then some believe.
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