Citation: Bill. "Relapse into Depression: An Experience with MDMA (Ecstasy) (exp57987)". Erowid.org. Sep 29, 2007. erowid.org/exp/57987
||(powder / crystals)
One night at work after not being able to find oxycontin my manager (a notorious coke head) let me know about a guy selling pure MDMA powder. I bought it for $30 and soon after getting it snorted the powder that came in the capsule. It was the worst tasting thing I have ever insufflated. It didn't really sting, it just tasted like really tangy orange juice or something.
About an hour later I got pretty irritable for about 5 minutes. Went to the bathroom and when I was finished I looked in the mirror. My eyes were pretty dilated. I was definitely tripping. I came out of the bathroom and joined my manager and some other coworkers who were hanging out on the patio of the restaurant after closing. Coming up was incredibly fast and intense and it freaked me out a bit. I decided after having a cigarette that I needed to be alone.
I got in my car and blasted the radio. I was feeling great. I couldn't believe how happy I was. I had school the next morning so I decided to just chill in my room till morning. I was able to sleep for about 3 hours and the rest of the time I watched TV. Everything on tv was interesting even if it was boring. I had alot of strange thoughts and feelings of forgiveness towards people I hadn't thought of in a long time.
The next day I was exhausted and the day after that I became anxious which soon led to depression lasting a good month. Six months prior to this experience I had been taking antidepressants and they had worked for me and I was able to get off of them. I believe that taking MDMA made me relapse back into my depressed state. I am now back on antidepressants. I don't regret taking it though.
COPYRIGHTS: All reports are copyright Erowid and you agree not to download or analyze the report data without contacting Erowid Center and receiving permission first.
Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the individual authors who submit them.
Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid Center.