Citation: Anonymous. "Not Worth Trying: An Experience with Cocaine & Cannabis (exp58486)". Erowid.org. Sep 29, 2017. erowid.org/exp/58486
Driving while intoxicated, tripping, or extremely sleep deprived is dangerous and irresponsible because it endangers other people. Don't do it!]
Now that I've read some other people's first experiences with coke and their subsequent addictions, I look at my first experience much more positively. It was unpleasant and a scary, but it could have been much worse and at least now I have no interest in ever doing it again.
It all started at a party where I was stressed out by stupid fights and drama, so my friends and I decided to get a gram of weed. We smoked a spliff between the three of us. This got us a little bit high. An hour later, after I had two glasses of wine at the party, we went for another round of weed, and we were quite stoned. After another hour, one of my friends and I went back to the car and smoked the rest of the weed with these two guys we met at the party. They rolled it into a blunt, which was shared between the four of us and a few other people. We only got about two hits each and the guys felt bad for finishing our weed, so they offered to share their coke with us.
I never saw myself as the type of person who would use hard drugs, but I was bored at this party. I was tipsy and curious enough to try it. Unfortunately, by the time they all did their lines, there was barely anything left for me. The guys insisted on picking up more coke and I was very interested to see what all the hype was about.
Being the most sober person, I ended up driving with them to some housing project to buy it. We got $40 worth, and split it between four of us in the parking lot. I did a huge line, but I felt no immediate effect. The guys then went to buy another $40 bag, and this time they got into an argument with the dealer over some money they owed him. The dealer was yelling obscenities and he sounded so angry that I was seriously afraid he might get violent. The guys settled their issue with the him and got the coke, but right as they were about to start preparing lines, we saw a cop car driving slowly through the parking lot. I yelled at them to hide everything, I got the hell out of there and drove back to the party.
By this time, the coke had taken effect. I wasn't feeling anything too extraordinary, just very energetic, awake, and talkative. I got a bit confused finding my way out of this housing complex, but otherwise I felt completely sober while driving. It was not a happy euphoric feeling though. If anything, I was jittery, anxious, and a bit paranoid. I was so worried about the cop following us that I threatened to leave the guys on the side of the road if they so much as looked at the coke while I was driving.
When we got back, we each did another line. At this point I was a little more relaxed and ready to go dance and have some fun. The party was great on coke, but not too much out of the ordinary. I felt pretty good, other than the runny nose and the foul chemical taste in the back of my throat that would not go away no matter how much water I drank. After maybe half an hour of dancing, the coke wore off. It was about 4AM, I was exhausted, and I sincerely wanted to sleep, but my mind was still racing. I felt depressed but at the same time anxious, distractable, twitchy, irritated, and much too awake.
I felt depressed but at the same time anxious, distractable, twitchy, irritated, and much too awake.
This feeling was my idea of what a panic attack would feel like. My friends and I went to finish off what was left of the coke, and I was good good for a while, but then I had the same withdrawal symptoms once the high was over.
This hangover was horrible, the worst part of the whole experience, and it lasted until noon of the next day. I could not fall asleep no matter how much I tried to relax, and my mind was filled with depressing, paranoid thoughts. I remembered everything I'd ever done wrong in my life, every embarrassing moment or painful experience, every time I'd felt used or disrespected. I felt like a complete failure and any little problem was totally magnified in my mind. I dwelled on the fight that had stressed me out a bit before the party, becoming much more upset about it than I was to begin with. I was nauseous and dehydrated, and that awful bitter cocaine taste was still not going away. I would drink a glass of water, and five minutes later have dry mouth again. My heartbeat was abnormally fast and would not slow down. I got even more desperate and frustrated because I couldn't do anything to make these symptoms go away faster.
At around 10AM, I realized that I had not eaten anything since before the party. I did not feel hungry at all and I could barely force the food down, but once I ate I felt a little better. When I finally did fall asleep, I had nightmares and kept waking up. My friend thinks the coke might have been laced with other stuff, and she said hangovers like these are not typical. However, the psychological after-effects alone are enough to turn me off from coke completely.
Overall, the high I felt was too short and not intense enough to be worth dealing with the horrible hangover and the shady people involved in its trade. I could have had just as much fun with alcohol, weed, or even sober if I am in a good mood to begin with, without the nasty after-effects. Coke is not something I ever want to try again.
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