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Skirting the Void
2C-E, Cannabis & Diazepam
Citation:   Phillo. "Skirting the Void: An Experience with 2C-E, Cannabis & Diazepam (exp62410)". Erowid.org. May 31, 2007. erowid.org/exp/62410

 
DOSE:
T+ 0:00
35 mg oral 2C-E (powder / crystals)
  T+ 0:00   repeated smoked Cannabis (plant material)
  T+ 13:00 22 mg oral Pharms - Diazepam (pill / tablet)
BODY WEIGHT: 120 lb
A good friend and I went away for a ‘fear and loathing’ (yea, original, I know) weekend to celebrate my 30th b-day. We left Boston early on Saturday, our destination a borrowed house on Cape Cod for a chemically hedonistic two day journey where we couldn’t be reached by the outside world. We brought dueling mp3 players filled with music and video, we brought speakers and recording devices, we brought blankets and moist towelettes.

Saturday’s poison was 2c-e, I decided on a dose of 30 or so mgs to start w/ 2 14mg boosters set aside for later on (HAH!). Both of us are experienced trippers and have used 2c-e up to 25 mgs and felt we could handle a bit more. I knew what we were potentially in for and at 3:28 pm we dosed. I measured 2 doses of approximately 30 mgs a piece onto some tin foil from which I poured the chemical into small glasses of courant juice (gross). I offered my friend roughly 8mgs on the counter that had spilled, bringing his total dose to roughly 38mgs. I cleaned up a 5mg spill myself which brought my own dose to about 35 mgs. My friend and I drank our tart drinks over the course of 15 and 45 minutes, respectively.

Our spirits were high, we were listening to a mix of soul, disco, drum n’ bass, techno, cheesy house, blues, jazz, ambient, 70s funk and everything in between from Lulu to DJ Shadow. We were happy to be away, both live alone but in situations not so conducive (though not impossibly so) to mind melting psychedelic experiences. We were looking forward to a good journey.

T+15 for my friend and he noticed ‘something’ and then proceeded to vomit every 15 minutes or so for the next 3 hours. He’d only had the courant juice to eat/drink the entire day, perhaps this is why it hit him harder than anything, including past 2c-e doses, ever had. He described everything as ‘swirling’ ‘so fast’, he actually felt he was motion sick. We’ learned from past 2c-e experiences that we don’t really settle into the ride until T+2 at which time restlessness, muscle spasms and GI discomfort fade away. This time, for my friend and me both, the onset was as extended as the rest of the trip. We kept friend drinking so he wouldn’t dehydrate though he would immediately vomit what he’d just drunk.

I had also fasted, but threw up only once. I ran to the bathroom, at T+1 and a small amount of courant juice was expelled. After rinsing my mouth I collapsed onto the floor of the bathroom, the now familiar 2c-e visuals manifested – intricate, swirling eddies of rainbow squiggles covered my visual field. The visuals were not yet overpowering but already fairly strong. At that moment, I was rather uncomfortable: lightheaded, nauseous, with racing thoughts and psychedelic vision, I was chugging up the first hill of a big fucking roller coaster.

I stumbled into the living room, the brighter lights revealing more intricate patterns and shades of neon – the visuals were edged in neon. I was quite lightheaded and a little alarmed, I had a brief moment of ‘the fear’. I could sense that I was in for a serious ride, as was my friend. It had been a long time since I’d really felt locked into an experience – I was locked into this experience, and it was very, very strong, and it was going to get even stronger still and persist for quite a while. I stood in the kitchen, before joining my friend in the living room. I realized: were I to let the fear take hold, it would be a very, very bad time. I swallowed the real panic and retreated to a large cushy chair and looked at my friend through a haze of swirling fractals, huddled on the couch looking miserable, eyes bloodshot and crazed.

‘Did we take too much?’ he asked.

I pulled myself together and looked at him straight in the face and said ‘no, we did not take too much, we are going to be fine. However, as you requested, you are going to have an intense experience. But, please, seriously, if at ANY TIME you feel scared, or unsafe – tell me. I may get very wrapped up in my own experience, don’t be afraid to talk to me’.

After this speech we decided to smoke some pot. I’d come armed w/a vaporizer and began the arduous process of setting it up. My friend made one of his frequent trips to the bathroom to barf and as I watched him walk from my location in the dining room, through the kitchen, down the hall and into a very long, long tunnel with rainbow neon mist clouding the distance between him and me it occurred to me how very, very fucked up I was. I did, however, manage to pack a bowl, though I spilled a good deal of pot. The pot didn’t do much, the 2c-e was too strong. We generally smoke copious amounts of pot during an experience such as this, for the 1st 5 hours or so, we largely forgot about the ganj.

A friend was to meet us at the house at T+2-3 hours and this was beginning to seem like poor planning on someone’s part (mine, perhaps). We were at a point where were unable to interact casually, so we called our friend and told her not to come. I was curled into a ball, wrapped in a blanket, hallucinating wildly, wrapped in music, close to the void, ‘You’re going fetal already?’ my friend asked with alarm. This was not a state conducive to communication at the casual level. Though we’d prepared a 12mg dose for our friend, and really wanted her to join us, we didn’t think she’d want to be around us: our failing short term memory and inability to speak coherent sentences might have put her off. ‘Abort’ I called from my fetal position between the speakers ‘abort’. After we cancelled, we felt better and settled into the trip.

I felt a persistent though mild need to urinate from T+2:00 to T+4:00. The 1st time I attempted to go I had just hit the peak, and I entered the darkened bathroom and sat on the toilet. I closed my eyes and was in a sea of black and white fractals and some dim colored swirlies, I was in a bubble of dim light, floating in the upper right corner of a vast space, something about this moment seemed like a tim burton film – not the context, the hallucination. I drifted and forgot where I was, forgot I was trying to pee. I opened my eyes after a few moments, slipped out of the void and looked towards a glowing rectangle of light that appeared to be very far away. Peeing was not going to happen, and I’m sitting on the toilet, completely lost in the moment.

I finally stood up, realizing just how long I’d stay where I was if I didn’t get up. I composed myself and made my way to the door. Every time I left the bathroom, I had the sensation that I was making a dramatic entrance, with a sort of flourish. I made 2 more unsuccessful attempts to urinate because, every time I got on the pot, I became so lost that the sensation to pee would dissipate as I slipped into void space. When alone, my racing thoughts slowed, I felt vastness. The delayed ability to urinate was slightly annoying but once I had success I felt triumphant.

My friend and I did not have a ‘spiritual’ trip, but there was severe mental alteration. We were unable to complete tasks that we set out to do, even simple tasks, like getting some water. At T+4 I desparately needed food, and it took my friend over an hour to make it. We kept going off on tangents and forgetting what we were doing, saying.

I stumbled into the kitchen to watch my friend finish his soup making task and he made a comment, ‘you know’ he said, ‘I don’t have kids, but still, I move the pan handle OVER the stovetop, remember, that PSA from the 80s, I mean, I move the fucking handle to the left, I’ve never been in any danger of knocking the pan over’. I thought this was SO FUNNY. I’d had similar, barely realized subconscious thoughts regarding the placement of the pan handle and this prompted a discussion, how many of our behaviors were imprinted through spooky gov’t propaganda. A commercial produced for the purpose of teaching families to keep the panhandle facing away from the front of the stove, hello?? My friend and I are the same age, went to elementary school together, though didn’t become friends until our early 20s. We compare notes re, 80s pop culture and how it’s affected our lives, who was the best phonics teacher at our alma mater, how many garbage pail kids did you have, etc.

When I finally ate my soup it tasted amazing, the warmth spread throughout my body. The warmth was nice as I was more cold than warm, however, if I bundled up or turned on the heat, I would get hot. Temperature was an issue throughout the night. Another weird 2c-e side effect experienced by my friend, coughing during the rise: my friend coughs for the 1st 2 hours of 2c-e, every time he’s done it. I also coughed this time, but not sure if they were sympathy coughs, but it did feel as if I’d taken an expectorant. Also, the nausea for my friend was severe and awful, and ruined the 1st few hours for him, though not the whole night – it did finally pass. He will never go this high again because of his GI reaction.

We decided to watch The Office and at this point one of my favorite 2c-e effects manifested. I’ve noticed, on 2c-e, more so than other psychs, a tendency to dissect a subject to its core -- to break everything down to its atomic structure, start talking about an elephant and end up at a neutron before getting back to the elephant not remembering the in between, knowing something is not quite right, and enjoying every minute of it. We watched this one episode of The Office, over and over and over, tearing it apart, dissecting scenes, replaying single lines of dialogue, pausing on facial expressions.

I was convinced that 1 scene was real. The way it was cut, roughly, as if the producers were forced to make cuts, something had happened that couldn’t be shown. I mean, it was so sloppy why not do another take? So, I was certain that there was all this subtext and I thought it was real. I don’t know, maybe it is, but we were mesmerized. ‘Is this real?’ ‘Are Americans watching this?’, ‘Are people talking about this’, ‘What is funny?’ I mean, it WAS funny, but it seemed very, very real and I was trying to understand what level Joe Sixpack was amused by. We both were. What makes this program successful? In re-watching the show over and over and over we got into a long, fanciful, whimsical, conversation, finishing each others’ sentences, desperate to get at the truth.

We then prepared a nest that we were sure was invisible to the outside world – we were in a borrowed space, there was some paranoia. We retreated to our nest, determined to vaporize a 2nd bowl of pot to completion (this took over 2 hours). During this time the conversation continued to flow, though it would have made little sense to an observer. We continued to speak in incomplete sentences, finishing thoughts w/facial expressions and body language. This mode of communication is only possible w/this friend, had I been with anyone else this period could have become extremely awkward and uncomfortable as I would have had great difficulty explaining myself, there was lots of, ‘You know what I mean cuz-‘, ‘Yea, yea it’s like that time when we-‘, ‘YES, EXACTLY!’, etc.

At one point my friend looked at me and said, ‘do you realize we have “supplemental” doses?’ This comment sent us into hysterics as the thought of ingesting any more, getting any higher, was absurd. What, exactly, would we be supplementing? We were at a point at which we were taking notes to remind us of thoughts and only remembering the notes and not the thoughts to which they were associated. Supplemental? I’m usually willing to take things a little further, but there was no way in hell I wanted to go anywhere but down from here.

We soon made a decision to play Grand Theft Auto and after 3 hours I lay immobile on the couch, enjoying a moment to myself. I observed the game, and the TV, the game seemed to flow out of the top of the television in a thick stream of color, the television took on religious connotations and was an idol in a sci fi flick, levitating in front of a glowing background of subtle shades of flowing fractals of color emanating from a central point of floating light. This vision was so soothing and though the visuals were not the focus of the experience, they were astounding. The ability to fantasize was strong and had I been alone I believe I could have visited many worlds staring at a patch of light on the wall.

We remained at a HIGH plateau from T+2 until about T+8, a strong +++ with moments of serious drifting. We stayed at a low +++ until about T+12 and slept at T+13:00 with the aid of 22mgs of valium. I went to sleep with marked visuals. I slept like a rock and woke the following day, a little hung over from the valium, my friend slept poorly. Would I ever dose this high again? Probably not, but what I loved was the looooooong plateau, there was never any urgency. There seemed to be a 6 hour period during which our state did not change: a true plateau. The next high dose I do take, say 25-30mgs will be alone, with a long play list, visual candy and meditation pillows. I’d also like to take a break from this substance and then start again very, very low. BUT – this experience was memorable, and brought me closer to my friend. I even had a little fun.

Exp Year: 2007ExpID: 62410
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: May 31, 2007Views: 7,969
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2C-E (137) : General (1), Relationships (44), Difficult Experiences (5), Small Group (2-9) (17)

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