Citation: DrAtom. "Insightful and Uplifting: An Experience with MDMA (Ecstasy) (exp64263)". Erowid.org. Jun 27, 2018. erowid.org/exp/64263
An Insightful and Uplifting Experience
This was my first time and most of my friends first time using MDMA or Ecstasy as some call it. I am very familiar with drug culture. I have experimented with LSD, Mushrooms, Cannabis, Salvia, and various opiates. I have been around people many times under the effects of MDMA, but thought that it was something I shouldn't try for a long time. Well, my time finally came.
I was visiting some friends during the summer and we were planning on going to the 311 and Matisyahu in concert. We had been planning for a month on going. I tossed the idea out there that we should maybe do ecstasy. We all discussed it for a while. We were back and forth about whether or not to do it, when to do it, and so on... eventually we just stopped worrying and let things come as they may. Well, the day had come for the show. We waited to the day of to actually get it. The pills we got were red with silver sparkles in them. They had the image of the BiC guy. You know... the one on BIC pens and lighters, the guy with the yellow body and black head. Anyways, I digress. We were told they were 'pure' MDMA and had a very clean come down. In the end, I believe what we got might have been MDE. It was not as stimulating and lasted much shorter than expected.
I took one full pill. I was the only one to do this. The rest of my friends either took half then half later or took only 3/4ths of one. Only one other person took more than me. He took 1 and 1/2. He and I clearly felt it more than everyone else. The time we took it at was roughly 15 minutes before 311 came on stage.
We were getting water and preparing for the show when we took our pills. We heard some guy come on stage and start asking everyone if they were ready for 311. It was around 8:30pm when we all took our pills. The sun was setting and a great experience was about to unfold for us. We all rushed up to get a good spot for the show. We were far enough that we weren't jammed next to each other, but close enough to be in the crowd right in front of the stage.
311 came on stage about 8:45-8:50ish. They played one or two songs and I started feeling the tab coming on about this time. I hadn't eaten much that day so I expected it to hit me sooner than normal. I had to pee really bad, and I didn't want to miss the show while I was 'rolling' so I headed for the bathroom. I was into my trip about 30-35 minutes around this time. I started noticing everything looking hazy and colors becoming vibrant. It was either that or it was caused by the light headedness I was starting to feel. When I came out of the bathroom I knew it wouldn't be long before I was rolling.
I made it back to my friends. I stood there for a while listening to 311 and trying to relax. It was now roughly 45 minutes into the trip. It really started hitting me. I started getting scared a little bit. I calmed myself down though, because I knew what to expect.
It felt very similar to how shrooms comes on. I felt light headed, tense, paranoid, and there was this burning/tense feeling in the back of my head and neck.
I felt light headed, tense, paranoid, and there was this burning/tense feeling in the back of my head and neck.
About this time I started sweating profusely. I sweated like crazy for about 10-15 minutes. The MDMA and hot atmosphere caused me to sweat so much.
About this time I look over at everyone and I can tell everyone is feeling what I am feeling. We are roughly 50 minutes to one hour into taking our pill. I mention to someone the tense-ass feeling I am having and they completely agree. My friend, lets call her 'N', sees me and pushes my sweaty-ass hair off my face and I thank her. She told me it looked like I needed it. It was very calming at a moment when I needed it the most. Then... all of a sudden it hit us.
It was a slow progression but all of a sudden about an hour and 10 minutes in to the trip we were going hard. My jaw started clinching so much. I passed around the gum I had brought. I also pulled out my only joint and smoked it with my friends. I only got to hit it once or twice, but it hit the spot. In retrospect, I wish I had a lot more weed for the show and trip. I could tell how the weed and tab were working off each other. Colors became much more vibrant and I got really into the music.
Everyone went from being uptight and tense and not dancing to dancing, talking, and smiling like crazy. We were in our own little world. Everyone one else around us had no clue what we were experiencing. It felt amazing. The main reason I decided to take ecstasy around this time was for thereupetic reasons. I had recently gone through a very bad break up and had a lot of anxiety from work/school/home. I wanted to free my mind as I had done with other psycadelics in the past. I started thinking about my EX and all the crazy shit she had done to me. I thought about my friends and how great it was to experience this with them. It was very bonding.
A few songs came on and I just felt like those songs were talking about what I was feeling. Not the tabs, but in life and lessons learned. I let go and instead of being stressed about my EX and worrying so much about things, I just let loose and went crazy. I started dancing with the music... smoking little cigars I brought. The thing is I am not much of a dancer, if at all, and I don't smoke much tobacco, but I did and I didn't care what anybody around me thought. This is very hard for me normally because I always thought people would think I am weird and a horrible dancer. The song Beyond the Gray Sky came on and everyone in the show started holding up lighters... I held one up and I remember looking over at the girl N and my buddies. We smiled at one another and it was like we had a connection and a bond. Not on a sexual, physical, attraction kind of connection, but a 'we are good friends and I am so glad you are here' kind of thing. It felt great.
I was drinking water lightly. I drank enough. I went from having to pee alot before the tab, but once I took the tab and started rolling almost all water I drank was absorbed. Water tasted so good and went down like it was nothing. I drank about 2 bottles during the whole rolling experience and about 1-2 before the rolling experience. Of course, I shared sips here and there and people also shared with me.
Occasionally, we would get a short burst of cool air and it felt amazing. It caused me to get goose bumps and felt so nice. Also, anytime I tried to light a cigarette or look at my watch I could not focus on it. Anything up close was impossible to focus on. I could see it, but it was hard to do things.
Anything up close was impossible to focus on. I could see it, but it was hard to do things.
My depth perception up close seemed to be off also. When trying to light a cigarette I had a little trouble.
There was this girl who had showed up and no one expected to be there. Lets call her 'M' and she was a friend of everyone's. She didn't have any, but luckily everyone who had some left over pitched in and she got to take about 3/4th of one. She totally felt it hardcore. At one point she wanted a hug and as I leaned in to give her a hug she kissed me on the cheek. I thought I needed to kiss back so I kissed her shoulder as we hugged. It felt amazing and I could tell she thought it felt great too. We spent a few songs dancing together and then she asked me if she could hold my hand. I gave it a shot. I felt neutral about it, because I always viewed holding hands as a relationship/like kind of thing. It wasn't bad, but at times I found myself not wanting to hold her hand, because I just didn't feel it. But, I wanted to be nice so I did for her. In retrospect, I think she wanted to make out and I wanted to also. Not because I am into her... not in the least bit, but because of the kissing earlier felt so cool.
The peak lasted about an hour. I was very disappointed in the end. Don't get me wrong, I loved every minute of it. But, it wasn't intense as I expected and I didn't feel like so many people I have seen feel. Most people seem like they go hard for 2-3 hours. I didn't have the physical touchyness that I expected. Only the kisses were nice and receiving that one on the cheek didn't feel that great, but giving them did. I didn't have the urge to rub anything or be rubbed. To me it felt like a really cool version of adderall, except shorter lived and more psychadelic. This is why I think I might have gotten MDE or a poor version of MDMA.
The come down was very easy. After the peak there was an 'afterglow' for about 2-3 hours. The drive home felt great and once we got home we smoked a bunch of bowls of some grass. The bud extended it a little and made me feel at ease. I felt great and like I had been liberated from a lot of things.
At this time I took some 'watsons'. They are hydrocodone I believe. I took two, and then 30 minutes later took one more. Once these started hitting me it felt like I was slightly rolling again. I heard they were good to take after your experience to relax you. Everyone had no problem going to sleep. I stayed up late with two other people just talking about the night and doing whatever.
Overall, I am really glad I got to experience it. The downside to it was it was way too short-lived. The peak lasted only about an hour. I wish it would have been longer like others have said. I know there are some better tabs out there to be had... ones that you can roll on for 3-4 hours. But, for a first experience this was great. I know what to expect next time.
I kind of wish I had done it in a closed situation and not as some huge concert, but the show was so amazing because of it... so its hard to say. It was also not as intense as I expected or wanted. I wanted a very intense experience. I wanted to feel like I had seen so many of my friends feel. I wasn't on that level. I was somewhere, but not there. I think next time I will take two or three IF they are the same ones. If not, then maybe one or two will do. I had a lot of stimulation from the show, so its sad to not feel all of that like I wanted to. I think a higher dose would have made for a more intense peak, but not for a longer one. I am so glad I did it though, and it was a great experience. I just wish I could have gotten some better stuff.
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