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Am I Dead?
LSD & Cannabis
by didn't expect that
Citation:   didn't expect that. "Am I Dead?: An Experience with LSD & Cannabis (exp64349)". Erowid.org. Jan 17, 2019. erowid.org/exp/64349

 
DOSE:
3 hits oral LSD (edible / food)
    oral LSD (liquid)
  3 hits smoked Cannabis (plant material)

BODY WEIGHT: 100 lb


[Erowid Note: The dose described in this report is very high, potentially beyond Erowid's 'heavy' range, and could pose serious health risks or result in unwanted, extreme effects. Sometimes extremely high doses reported are errors rather than actual doses used.]

It was about 10 at night and I was with my two roommates. We were completely bored so my boyfriend and I decided randomly to take some LSD. The other roommate doesn't really enjoy tripping that much but he was completely ok with just hanging out with us for the night. My boyfriend and I both had a 3 hitter sugarcube and we had the remnants of a vial left. We had been saving this vile for sometime but didn't know quit what to do with it. We just decided to go for it. We then cut it open and licked out the remaining liquid in it. Stupid move, but we thought it would probably be a fun night. After the trip had ended I would say that it felt about like 9 hits total for the night? That is a complete guess but just for the sake of trying to put a number on it, I think that's it.

Just for the record we are both very experienced with LSD, although we had never taken quite as much as this we have taken 5-6 hits on a regular basis. We have never had bad trips either, maybe rough moments but that's about it.

It was almost instantaneous. Most likely because of us licking it out, I don't know. I would say less than 20 minutes we were very much coming up. Everything was going awesome though. We were both feeling really great and decided to go down to the basement to play some music and just hang out. My boyfriend, lets call him John, was playing guitar and I was playing piano, and it was awesome. Ha. Playing music while tripping is the most awkward yet satisfying thing. I became completely entranced in it. For full minutes at a time I would just go off on my own little solo and feel as though it was my soul speaking in music form.

I then decided to do some painting which only turned out to be bright colors and squiggly lines of weird faces and things. My other roommate, Frank was just playing drums completely happy watching us playing and painting terribly. I would find myself just staring at the tapestry on the wall as the butterflies would almost fly off of it and around the room. I could feel their souls, they were real. The picture I was painting was real, the man's face I was drawing was speaking to me. Sometimes good sometimes mean things. My spirits were still high though.

After about an hour of this we decided to go upstairs, it wasn't quite as intense as we were expecting so we decided to smoke some weed. If there was anything we shouldn't have done, it was smoke weed. We usually do quite a bit but almost instantaneously after smoking the other three hits from the sugar cubes brought us to our knees. We were just sitting on the couch listening to Tom Waits and my world collapsed. The room fell over on itself. Frank told me afterwards that I said I'm going crazy, the world is falling apart. With each second the room would collapse on itself then the next second it would do it again and then again. I would close my eyes and I had no idea what was going on outside of my mental head. I had no idea if I was standing, sitting, laying, nothing. All I could feel was pure terror. It was the biggest mind-fuck I have ever experienced. I remember looking up and seeing my roommate and being scared to death of him because he wasn't tripping with me and had no idea what I was going through. I curled up in my boyfriend's lap (who at this point later said that at that moment almost the same thing happened to him) and cried and kept repeating I'm going crazy, I'm going crazy. After what seemed to be an eternity (I'm sure it was only a minute) I regained sight of what was happening, I was just tripping, it is only a drug. We decided some fresh air would do us good.

I think sometimes walking is the only way to go, so we walked. The world was dark, not new and fresh like I had experienced in every other trip. There were demons lurking around every tree, every bush. Just keep walking, just keep walking. My heart was racing. I would close my eyes and my body would disappear, my lip ring was the only thing that still existed. (It was really weird, but I think because I was biting it constantly that that's why I thought this) My body was dead. All that was left was my beating heart, I was a walking dead. I asked several times if there was any way I could die from this drug only to have my boyfriend reassure me that there was no way on only 9 hits.

We talked and talked, mostly about theology. We were completely unhindered to talk about religion, spirituality, and how we think the world should be. God seemed utterly ridiculous. Religion was ridiculous. Culture seemed ridiculous. I didn't even know why I even wore clothes.

At one point during the night we saw a train go by. We ran full sprint until we were about 5 feet from it. It was the most amazing thing I had ever seen. The only thing that was real at that moment was the train. Everything else was some sort of foreign world. The train was almost comforting. The sound of the whistles, the way the wheels sound on the tracks. It was so large and so loud it took over my world for those few minutes. It was one of those moments that you are so overwhelmed that you just want to cry, not out of terror, but out of awe. The wind from the train was absolutely breathtaking.

From there we decided to go inside we were feeling a little better after that. The house was so foreign. While walking up the stairs I felt like I was entering new worlds. If I looked at anything I could see a fourth dimension. It's really hard to explain, but it was definitely nothing like a 3-d world. The walls were more than breathing, they were alive. The door would move so much that it could be on the other side of the wall. Everything had a spirit, everything had a voice talking to me, some comforting, some not so comforting. I eventually had to lay on the bed, which is where I stayed for the rest of the night and closed my eyes. I had to just let go of everything holding me back from having a good trip. Every anxiety, I just had to let go of. The world was swimming in itself. It was almost like the world was dancing. For the last couple of hours that is all that we did, lay there and let the music and the world dance with us.

Exp Year: 2007ExpID: 64349
Gender: Female 
Age at time of experience: Not Given 
Published: Jan 17, 2019Views: 472
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LSD (2), Cannabis (1) : General (1), Difficult Experiences (5), Bad Trips (6), Music Discussion (22), Small Group (2-9) (17)

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